Simon Lord

@Heidi_Labour @UKLabour @Keir_Starmer Ah, I see that you got the Save Keir’s Arse memo.

Today's results are brutal. People want us to deliver the change they voted for in 2024. The last thing we need is to descend into a vanity leadership contest. @Keir_Starmer is clear he will roll his sleeves up & deliver for the country. And in Swindon, we will play our part.

@ronportnoir @paulmasonnews Starmers inner beast coming out of the cage.

@paulmasonnews Starmer needs to let the beast out of the cage, no more mister nice guy.

I don't want Keir to resign - nor do I want him to set a timetable for resigning - I want the Labour Party to diagnose its own problems and the wider fragmenting political landscape and face facts: working class people are in a zero sum game and we need to be on their side ... 1/

@MatthewStadlen 80% of the electorate didn’t vote for the Labour Party in the GE, and look at what that saddled us with.

Three quarters of voters in England took a look at what Farage and Reform are selling and said: No thanks.

@Fx1Jonny Well, the country managed to somehow let Keir Starmer slither into Downing Street, so it’s fair to assume that they lost their mind some time ago.

They are actually gonna make Nigel Farage the next PM. This country has lost its fucking mind!

@Anniepop2027 @SkyNews @BBCNews 80% didn’t vote for Labour, but look how that turned out.

Let’s be clear Labour vote UP 4% this year Reform vote DOWN 6% at least this year. Reform have LOST. Despite the media push to get them out to vote. 74% did not vote Reform This is hyperbolic nonsense - Labour did well considering the media onslaught @SkyNews @BBCNews

@louderry Keep polishing that Labour shaped turd.

No one campaigned harder for Reform than the British media. Result so far 2 just 2, council gains. 🤣

@bphillipsonMP “Ok minister, we are floundering in the polls and expecting a wipe out in the local elections. Say something to motivate the masses.” “Free breakfast clubs!” “Well, if that doesn’t persuade the plebs to vote for us, minister, nothing will.”

✔️ Lifting a record number of children out of poverty ✔️ Free breakfast clubs in schools ✔️ Accessible, affordable childcare ✔️ Free school meals for more children Change like that only comes with a vote for Labour 🌹

@BenjBenjBenjM @DazzyBroad @metpoliceuk @declassifiedUK Really?

@MPC3675 @DazzyBroad @metpoliceuk @declassifiedUK They’re not amateurs they do it for a job, hope this helps.

@ShabanaMahmood @UKLabour …….if you are insane.

Vote Labour 🌹

@calculus52 Well done. I hope that your mental health improves very soon.

I've voted Labour! The best PM and government in decades

@Captain34466242 @ExInspectorBDS 🤣🤣🤣 proper coppering! 🤣🤣🤣

@MPC3675 @ExInspectorBDS I did see a City Wpc deal with a drunk on a night bus-not so gobby being led squeaking down the stairs of a route master by a firm and painful grip on his bollocks. Many years ago now.

People rarely attacked female officers when I joined. I sometimes suspect that might be because, on the rare occasions they did so, we'd beat them to within an inch of their lives. Happier times.

@lancelachlan Avoids persona scandals? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣breathe 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣breathe 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣aw bollocks, I’ve just pissed myself.😖😖😖😖😖😖

Here’s a sharper version that flips the framing a bit more: The right-wing media hate Keir Starmer because he’s boringly normal. Drinks beer, watches football, spends time with his family, avoids personal scandals, and gets on with the job instead of chasing every online outrage of the week.

@AngelaRayner The gullible school kids that you accosted the other day might believe you, we don’t.

No matter what they say, Reform UK will only let down the working class. They voted against our better deal for workers. With your support, we got it done. Only Labour will work for working people. Vote Labour 🌹

@parlyparty @TheGreenParty The TikTok generation, young and gullible, voting for a party that will make no difference whatsoever to their lives, led by a man with a distant relationship to the truth and filled with the worst of the Corbyn supporters. What could possibly go wrong?

My 18yr old son is voting for @TheGreenParty tomorrow. So are all his 18 yr old friends. All the bots on TikTok that billionaires money can buy won’t change their minds. They’re voting for their futures. They’re voting for humanity. They’re voting for #Hope💚 #VoteGreen💚

@Lord_Talbot64 @copping_nicola As much as I’d like to ridicule him, he is actually using a cordless phone.

Keir Starmer “calling voters at Labour HQ” on a landline phone that isn’t even plugged in 😂

@InspGadgetBlogs I recall during my service a guy was promoted to skipper on the strength of his interview where he declared himself bisexual and disabled as he claimed to suffer from dyspraxia. They couldn’t promote him quickly enough as he ticked plenty of boxes.

I know a man who pretended to be gay to get promoted to Ch Inspector. This worked for two reasons. First the force was 'under-represented' by LGBTQ+ in senior ranks. Second, they dared not fail an openly LGBTQ+ candidate. Only non-police followers will not believe this.

@valeriemann20 @KitKlarenberg @shirvani_rose Shame on the defendants, every one of them, particularly the cowardly streak of piss that struck the female police officer with a sledgehammer, is what you meant to say.

@KitKlarenberg @shirvani_rose Shame on the judge and shame on the jury. I wonder how handpicked they were.

Absolutely scandalous four Palestine Action activists have been convicted in a deeply corrupted trial. Jurors were barred from knowing they would be sentenced as terrorists, and could be acquitted on conscience. They face *very* lengthy jail terms now. aljazeera.com/news/2026/5/5/…