Ali Elkin

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Ali Elkin

Ali Elkin

@AliElkin

A pleasure to have in class.

New York, N.Y. Katılım Ocak 2009
999 Takip Edilen1.3K Takipçiler
Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Not me RSVPing yes to my Barre class Friendsgiving because @AOC and @PeteDDavis say I have to join a club.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Keep thinking about that article about the guy with the online gambling addiction who kept digging himself deeper because he wanted to win to show himself he had been doing the right thing and not a very stupid thing, and I think that’s also why some men keep voting for Trump.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Love when a restaurant calls its drinks menu a “cocktail program” like I’m about to go to grad school for being tipsy.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
What do homeschooled kids dream about when they grow up?
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Jennifer Bendery
Jennifer Bendery@jbendery·
I got a screenshot before it was wiped. This was on JD Vance's Senate campaign website until yesterday:
Jennifer Bendery tweet media
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
I would love for one of them, either of them, to enter to “Tambourine.”
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Is THIS why there’s that terminal in JFK where the only viable food option is Eat & Go Istanbul?
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
This should be a DBQ on the AP US History exam.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
I’ll tell ya how I’m doing. Not well, bitch!
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
As long as I’m back on Twitter and more horrified than I’ve ever been in my life, maybe it’s time to take up smoking again.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
My 3-y-o: What song does a dog sing? Me: Hmm maybe BINGO? 3-y-o: What song does a hamster sing? Me: *cracks knuckles*
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Being a mother of two has so removed me from the zeitgeist that I didn’t even feel the damn earthquake.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Lol the first omelette I make on this @LGUS stove is actually a binding arbitration agreement.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Me serving dinner to my three-year-old on a Sunday
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
Maybe the baby shoes in the six-word story are never worn simply because baby shoes are fucking useless.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
I just don’t understand how my breast milk is so fabulous if it’s made out of Italian combos and cream soda.
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Ali Elkin
Ali Elkin@AliElkin·
“Preventing picky eating” is just code for “let’s try to make them thin without giving them eating disorders.” It’s the new version of putting your kids on WeightWatchers while lecturing them about Barbie’s waist circumference. romper.com/parenting/when…
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