God's Weakest Soldier

@turboghosto Did you lose a fight? I don't drink my meals

yall on team soupa mario or stewigi

@meatypepper I got in trouble at work for using this filter on freight

she say i'm a dog but it takes one to kno one 🐕 i refuse to let this filter die!!! 🐶

@real_lord_miles >suited up for gaming Unfathomably based, I miss living somewhere cold enough to do this

Got 2nd place on Fortnite, lost to either 7 year old or bot. NOT a good start to the day at 5am 👎🏻

@meatypepper Well now you have to ask your father

doxxing my nips but i have the unfortunate reality of Massive Aerola Syndrome (even before pregnancy) and i read it's genetic so i asked my mom if she has em too and she was like "?? wdym let me see" and when she saw mine she went "omg!!! wowww yeah.... no you did not get that from me" part 2 is she told me how they say when you're breastfeeding you're supposed to shove the whole areola and nipple in baby's mouth but that i shouldn't do that method bc i'll probably suffocate my son and then she laughed 💀

@memeticsisyphus I cannot forgive them for discouraging a whole generation of kids reading the classics "Tess of the D'Urbervilles"? "The Handmaid's Tale"? Yes more novels of women getting mistreated pls this is what Classic Literature is like Took me 15 years to start reading Don Quixote, banger

For what it’s worth I liked most of my teachers, the only ones I hold in contempt and think about unprompted years later are the absolute garbage English teachers I had in high school that put me off reading fiction for years.

@realfrothyfriar 2 stories is AVERAGE okay

I need a backyard wizard mini-tower

@pika_nekopanda Zankoku no tenshi

海外ニキへ質問です。 日本の曲といえば最初に何を思い浮かべましたか？

@MediocreJoker85 A knight, victim of an ambush? Sir Prized.

What do you call a knight that ventured too far into enemy territory? Sir Rounded.

@turboghosto Just tell them your accountant is on floor n+1

fuck. the tax assessor just found out that my tower actually contains an infinite number of floors, and now hes saying I owe a veritable dragons hoard in back taxes. if I don’t pay, he’ll send the iron rogues of scylla after me. im a powerful wizard but i am NOT taking on the IRS

@bauhiniacapital Third sino-Japanese war when?

This was the honest-to-god sunset today in HK. Zero filter. Zero adjustments. Just a zoom.

@UpdatingOnRome I believe him, he looks like a heterosexual Hadrian

Be ready.

@ReviewsPossum "Under communism, libraries would work out which book was most efficient to print, and they would print ten million copies of just that book." Repurposed from the fridge quote but it'll do

This is like complaining that every library has books.

@romanhelmetguy I think they're meaning the "Honorius" part of the "Roman spirit," or perhaps the "Theodosius" part

Reignite the Roman spirit? You guys won’t even go to war against Persia.

@Profit_Lx Johnny Bravmoo

소의 이름을 지어주세요

@SandyofCthulhu @AaronSeeingGood Aaaaeeuuuerrrrggghhh

@AaronSeeingGood The tough coughed as he ploughed through the dough.

I'm learning Greek, and every time I learn a letter that makes the same sound as 2 or 3 other letters, I get frustrated, but then I remember I speak English

@mudscryer "Have you considered not mutilating your baby's penis" is the most natural starter

Can anyone counsel me on how to approach my brother about not circumcising his baby next month? I’m very anti circumcision becuase I think an adult should be making that choice for themselves and not a baby having its body part cut off but idk how to approach it with him

@ShipwrightA Spoiler: This is part of the plot of A Connecticut Yankee in the Court of King Arthur by Mark Twain Worth reading btw

The iron steed wasn’t as cool as I had imagined.

@gregthesorcerer (he's casting Blizzard)

Making it hail at the strip club tonight

@turboghosto The saddest listing a wizard/witch couple can ever write

for sale: new orb, never scried

@MitchicusX @MonikaCinnyRoll Correct

Y'all, send me a good anime to watch. No slice of lifes or isekai Something with indominable human spirit