Shemeshka the Marauder

While I spin the deepest dark of things, I spin lies just as often. Dance little puppets! Dance lest the razorvine of my crown grace your flesh! #Planescape #Dnd (formerly @AskShemeshka ) This is the obnoxiously in-character alt of D&D / Pathfinder author @TheRealShemeska

Yugoloth. It's yugoloth. Call me a furry and you'll get knifed in a back alley by well-dressed tieflings! *preens in art-patron* #Planescape #dnd #dnd5e [Art by Nanihoo, based on the original meme]

A random day in Gehenna... Arcanaloth 1: I know you're on contract with Pazuzu while secretly on Mammon's payroll. Arcanaloth 2: I absolutely am not! Arcanaloth 1: Yes you are and I want a cut! Both of them: *GEKKERING INTENSIFIES!* #Planescape #dnd #dnd5e

John Legend was obviously singing about me in his song, "You Deserve It All" I am indeed the gift that keeps on giving! -I- deserve it all! Gimme gimme gimme mortals! Bring on those early 'lothmas gifts!

Very yugoloth line from Chevelle's song 'Fizgig' "I never meant you torture, but I didn't care that much." So let me ask you mortal, is it better or worse if your misery is due to a deliberate plan, or simply without reason? *preen*

Today is a new day for you mortal. Go one day at a time. Succeed. Make bank. Above all, understand that I will not allow you to die before you pay me back every dime that I loaned you wretched mortal, plus extensive interest! *preen* #ominouslypositiveShemeshka #Planescape #dnd

It's post Shemeshka'ween, but here's something REALLY scary! #Planescape #dnd [Art by Nanihoo]

Happy Shemeshka'ween mortals! *preen* #Planescape #dnd #dnd5e [Art by Nanihoo]

*preen*

Consider mortals: what's the point of dressing up in costume and trying to trick me? I have true seeing, magic to make an archmage weep, and stylish tieflings with knives. Don't kid yourselves. Let's just jump to where you give me all of your candy! *preen* #Planescape #dnd

It's nearly Shemeshkaween! *preen* #Planescape #dnd [Art by Nanihoo]

Just remember: I'm the best. I'm always the best. *preen* #Planescape #dnd [Art by Nanihoo]

Obviously I Google my own name. *castigating, judgmental stare* You mortals are freaks. [Art by Nanihoo]

The Duality of Shemeshka: Be an absolute preening social darling, and then with little to no provocation, just flip out and whip a berk with razorvine. Somewhere in the middle whisper to your tieflings to stab someone in an alleyway. *preen* [Art by Nanihoo] #Planescape #dnd

@antodemico Just so long as everyone understands that I am and remain the best arcanaloth. *preen*

So I haven't said much lately. I've been asleep! For months. Physically merged with a boulder I dragged from Gehenna (and surrounded with a velvet rope). Because that's how arcanaloths sleep. Now go away you wretched mortals. I needed by beauty sleep. *preen*

In light of recent events... *intrinsic yugoloth misotheism intensifies*

New power move: Sit some berk down at your table, serve them Bradford pear ice cream and tell them to eat it. It's one step up from pissing in a bottle and making them drink it. It's also not something you freaks might look forward to. *preen* instagram.com/reel/DJANvPCTb…

Happy Easter mortals! *preen* [Art by Nanihoo]

Who in the Oinoloth's name is June Way and why in the Oinoloth's name is she getting more fan art than me while cribbing my damn style?! *ANGRY PREEN* #Pathfinder #dnd

@ShepEffect Yes, but invariably the pranks escalate into a silver knife in the back, or silver powder in your water bottle, or swapping out Shylara's perfume with aerosolized silver. Actually most of the pranks start at that level as well. *preen*

@Ask_Shemeshka Your lordship, are you aware of the mortal past time around this time of year? Where we play pranks on each other? Do arcanoloths also play pranks on each other? I will refrain from using the phrase "good-natured fun" and instead substitute "neutral-natured evil" for context.

Everything I've ever touched invariably ends up with claw marks. Metaphorical or otherwise. *preen*