BatCAt

You know how there are fortunes in fortune cookies, and uplifting sayings on the back of sugar packets? I'm going to start a business that puts rude comments on salt packets. Gonna call them insalts.

Awww heck. RIP Chuck. Thanks for the movies and the best memes.

Wish I knew who to credit. Sent via a friend. Thank you anon whoever you are. Nailed it.

accidently typed in gail.com instead of gmail, and its my new favorite website.

@AlanRMacLeod I'd love to see the byline. You know, so I know whose opinion to ignore on every matter, ever.

An absolutely insane start to a story.

Laptop is napdragon powered.

@Nick_Frost Ugh now I have a headache.

@BatcatCA That’s the joke u fk!

If you find proofreading painful, consider taking a painkiller. I can't tell you how often I be proofin on ibuprofen

@CAPITALSIGMAza Same as VMware... It's like they don't think reality exists.

@BatcatCA The moment Oracle changed its licencing rules, the accountants added a huge liability line-item on the balance sheet. And for big companies like Sasol, that's not a small figure. Once a contigent liability, always a contingent liability. What did Oracle think would happen? 🤡

Sasol ditches Oracle Java for open source OpenJDK. Oracle got long in the tooth and jumped the shark with their unilateral pricing and licencing changes. Too late, enterprises are moving away. finance.yahoo.com/news/azul-core…

@Micylaaa Just wait until you see northern Alberta...

This is more about the traffic it causes tbh

@AngeloCoppolaSA Blue skies and fair winds, Angelo. Love and condolences to your family.

Good morning from the kitchen for a final time. Rumours of my death are true. “Goodbye cruel world.”

@kitzluvs It's Friday, Saturday-Sundae, what? :P

@kitzluvs Friday, Saturday, Sundae.

@ShellsPemBroke (even if I'm the pits at actually using it)

@BatcatCA And this is why you were allowed to have my phone number ❤️❤️

The only way I can fucking deal is through writing. A message to Norden 💔

@ShellsPemBroke you're 1derful, so there.

@BatcatCA What is less than 3? Is it 2? Is it 1??! (I fucking love you and my jokes are gonna be horrible for a while ❤️)

Gonna start a society-for-awkward-people-who-are-bad-at-networking and go stand at conferences with a sign.

@ShellsPemBroke I so damn sorry Shells. Sending all my love to you and Raph.

This fucking sucks. But here’s what it is. My kid’s dad is no longer with us. I say “kid’s dad” but he was also my husband and chosen partner for over a decade. To anyone who knew him, I’m so sorry, I am fucked. I am processing. I’m trying to be the best mom that I can 🤷‍♀️💔

@Micylaaa The glass of wine after the next half marathon.

What am I thinking about?

Working by osmosis.