Ben Malisow

Waitasec...you mean to tell me that they had all these No More Kings rallies...then, like, THREE WEEKS LATER an actual king shows up???? I hereby promise to attend the very next No More Gold Bars, Motorcycles, and Blowjobs rally.

@Parkerlawyer So....the company now employs...nobody?

In 1998, I was fired from my corporate job while 9 months pregnant because and I quote, “my priorities would be elsewhere after the baby is born.” The lawyer I hired told me I didn’t have a case because discrimination like “that” was almost impossible to prove. So I got pissed. Took the LSAT. Went to law school. Passed the bar. Had 3 more kids. Twelve years later, another woman from that same company was fired for the same reason. She sued them for a million dollars, and won, partly because I had kept every piece of evidence from what happened to me years prior demonstrating a systemic pattern of discrimination against women. That company no longer exists. My law practice is thriving. And that baby they said would derail my priorities? She’s a brilliant attorney now working at my firm. Turns out my priorities were indeed, elsewhere.

@elonmusk I really don't like the "then" for "than" typo. It bothers me.

lol

@SandyofCthulhu As a narrative device, and a way to blend some magical effects, maybe include a Mat Shot. Which is what you get when the bartender lifts the bar mat and tilts the dregs of all the night's spills into a shot glass.

So I am creating a cultist tavern for a Call of Cthulhu adventure and I want it to have the nastiest liquors imaginable. Not the cheapest - the nastiest. Obviously Absinthe is a star. My problem is I am a teetotaler. So I don’t know what ANY liquor tastes like, except cheap whiskey and apple wine which I tried in my misspent youth. I’m thinking Jagermeister, Absinthe, Jeppson’s Malört, banana schnapps, Fireball, Certain Baiju (Chinese pal recommended this), Fernet-Branca and … what else? Suggestions are welcomed. Cloying sweet is as gross as bitterness so let me know. Yes, all the drinks have a magic effect TBD.

@WrestlerHauser The former is so overrated, and the latter so under.

Zach Cregger, amidst his very busy schedule, had me and Austin Abrams over to his apartment for Thai food and we watched DINER and THE KING OF COMEDY.

@The_Kyle_Mann @SouthernKeeks Never underestimate the power of Kabbalah.

@SouthernKeeks How does the blood get on the shirt but not the tie?

This former comedian is a headliner at the November “Christ is King” conference.

@oeingoboeing I know the time it would take is an onus on you, but reporting them for attempted fraud would probably go a long way toward forcing them to clean up their act.

I don't like being bullshitted by a place I contracted with to simply replace tires and do an alignment on my 2.5 year old SUV...especially when I was just underneath it yesterday replacing the brakes they say are "worn-beyond-limits." "Oh, you don't say? That's surprising...since I literally just replaced them myself yesterday and the car has less than 50 miles on them." "Oh..." "Yeah...oh." "Well your rear shocks are leaking." "No they are fucking not." I used to know almost everyone that worked at this particular Pep Boys from the manager on down. It used to be a place I could trust to send my wife if she had car issues while I was out of town. Since I was last in, there's apparently been a lot of change.

@matvelloso Wait-- the dev purposefully engineered SQL injections??

Years ago a junior dev in my team built a web service that would take a full SQL as the input, and run it straight into the database. He argued this would make it the most flexible, simple approach and any use case would just work. We had to patiently explain all the things that could go horribly wrong with that.

@Delicious_Tacos @HoraceSpellman9 YUP. The scene where Oddjob cracks the fireplace mantlepiece with his hand, after Bond had spent the first part of the book entertaining the notion of writing a manual on hand-to-hand combat...and realizing his pasty white British ass was not up to the task.

@HoraceSpellman9 Check out the Goldfinger novel, not far off

Now this Bond novel I would read

@TheJeffPutnam That's inane. Fuck your last-minute change order; offer me financial incentive to stay late, wait for me to accept or decline, or eat the fucking order. I ain't your slave; we have an employment contract. And I'm a senior citizen.

It’s odd to me to come across so many young people (17-25) who fail to understand that responsibilities don’t just disappear because you’re angry to think something isn’t fair. Had a 19 year old kid start at my job two days ago and today he was fired. Why? Because of a last minute change order on a job required him to stay at a customers house later than he expected. “But I made plans.” No one gives a flying fuck. Shut the fuck up, man up, and do your job without whining like a little bitch. But no, instead of doing his job, he threw a mini tantrum and then called his girlfriend to drive 45 minutes across town to come pick him up. It’s fucking pathetic.

@karlykingsley This is simply and truly wrong. Check out various state laws regarding unmarried men getting a vasectomy, for one example.

🎯

@StumpGuyTy Can I possibly be the only one who looks at this and doesn't think it looks any better than a flat wall in any way? Like: I truly can't understand why anyone would care. More: a bunch of little flat surfaces that will collect dust and need to be cleaned.

Poke holes in this business idea for me: Friend of mine bought a new build a couple years back. Everything inside was very builder grade. He slowly added wall moldings, beadboard, wallpaper and the house is now completely transformed. Why is there no company that ONLY does this for builder grade homes? I’m talking: - Crown moulding - Box Mouldings - Beadboards/wallpaper If your answer is “just hire a carpenter” that carpenter is doing 6 other types of jobs that probably pay better. Genuinely curious, what am I missing?

@MattForVA It's weird that I already agree with you, but I take your assertions with a grain of salt because you somehow got "tidal wave" wrong.

When I was at the Countering Weapons of Mass Destruction (CWMD) program at DHS, the official position of the program about the origin of Covid was that it either “naturally” originated from the wet market, or it was a lab leak. The official position was “both of those scenarios are equally plausible.” Keep in mind, the wet market just happened to be a few miles from where they were doing gain of function testing on that very virus. You don’t have to be an expert, common sense would tell you it came from the lab. The only question is was it intentional or unintentional. In talking to the scientists that worked on that program, they told me that their true position was that it more than likely came from a lab leak. They told me they had authored a report with that assessment. I asked why that assessment was never released. One scientist told me directly that the SES and GS-15 that presided over the program stopped that assessment from moving forward. The reason given was, that assessment would cause political title waves, and they didn’t want to deal with the effects. These are the people we have working for us at the highest levels of government. These people are not only too risk adverse to make important decisions, they are also just downright evil. Nothing will change in this country, and it will never be fixed, until the government is purged of these bad actors.

@seanmdav Modern data centers might have 12 people inside, per shift. Most everything is automated. They are not overwhelming local schools with employees' kids. And I assure you more damage has been done due to espionage activities at golf courses than any data center.

Most golf courses use their own water. Pump houses next to ponds and lakes aren’t there for looks, turbo. Many others are in flood plains and the land cannot be used for anything else. Golf courses don’t hire infinity foreign nationals who crowd schools, overwhelm infrastructure, or spy for our enemies. Golf courses don’t jack up power rates, and they also don’t scale resource-wise. Many are public and have great trails. They’re beautiful and the opposite of a soulless, concrete eyesore. They make land values instantly go up, because everyone loves having them nearby. Hope that helps. Get better talking points. bUt mUh GoLf cOuRsEs is low IQ slop.

@DaddyWarpig Not seeing Garrison Keillor there.

Morgan Freeman the only choice, not to insult any of these other eminent actors. Some special people should get PeeWee Herman.

@IMAO_ Tarantino's unnecessary addition of the racial component to their dialogue was jarring, even on first viewing. It could have been any two men-- there was zero reason to put that in there, other than to be Tarantino-y. Tarantino-esque? Whatever.

Good movie but I always felt it chickened out with its “everybody was right” ending. I was 15 when I saw this in theaters and had to scam the ticket seller since it was R and I wasn’t with parents.

@Jringo1508 Serendipity. When my gf was rereading Dracula, she mentioned how cool it was to have a story told in epistles. I was reading LC at the time, and told her about it.

I once told a (very lefty) 'Adjunct Professor' of English that I'd written an entire book of all tell no show. I was told 'You can't do that!' 'Really? It was very popular.' So is Dracula. (Just a different format than Last Centurion.)

@SandyofCthulhu @mikemoviez The Ballad of Cable Haug My Name is Nobody

Here are ten great somewhat less well-known westerns. 1) Angel and the Badman 2) Destry Rides Again 3) Johnny Guitar 4) Western Union 5) The War Wagon 6-7) The Westerner AND Judge Roy Bean (see these in order - they both tell the same story, but in the first Bean is the villain, and in the second he's the hero) 8) Support Your Local Gunfighter 9) The Over The Hill Gang 10) Rio Bravo

I'd like to get a list of good westerns going, but not the typical ones. The John Ford and Sergio Leone stuff, Magnificent Seven, True Grit, High Noon, The Wild Bunch etc. I'm looking for good westerns that aren't mentioned as often or have slipped under the radar 🤠

@MatthewModine Would you schedule a DVD double-feature and call it "Bye Bye/Birdy?"

That’s quite rare! BYE BYE LOVE isn’t available to stream, rent, or buy digitally anywhere and it’s never been released on Blu-ray. Unless you have an old VHS tape, LaserDisc, or this DVD from two decades ago, you can’t watch this movie! It was originally released by 20th Century Fox, so the rights now reside with Disney. @PaulReiser @RandyRRQuaid

@SandyofCthulhu Control - William Goldman The Troop - Craig Davidson That's all I got. You may be on to something.

There are mostly only good horror short stories and novelettes. It's so hard to make a good horror novel that it has only been accomplished a couple of times. Bram Stoker did it once (Dracula), Arthur Machen did it once (The Great God Pan), Shirley Jackson did it twice (Haunting of Hill House & We Have Always Lived in the Castle), and there's not many others. Think about Stephen King. His short stories are head and shoulders superior to his turgid over-long novels. When we think back on his novels what do we remember? The characters? No. We remember Ralphie floating outside his brother's window, or an evil clown peering out of the storm drain, or the Overlook's topiary animals stalking Danny. No one remembers the plot, because they stink. Ask someone to remember the plot of Lord of the Rings or To Kill a Mockingbird or Death on the Nile or Harry Potter and they can recount it at tedious length. But The Stand's plot? Um ... there was an epidemic and then ... Las Vegas? Or something? We only recall the short scenes - the books' equivalents to short stories. I think King knows this, which is why his books go for about 2 chapters, then a scary scene, then another 2 chapters, then scary. Rinse and repeat. Lovecraft's two longest tales clock in at about 130 pages. M. R. James never wrote a horror novel. The two sentence horror trend is solid. There's a reason for this, and it's because it's very difficult to keep the terror going for a novel's length. Below is one of the shortest horror stories ever written, by Fredric Brown, who wrote some REALLY scary short vignettes. He wrote novels, too, but they weren't horror and thus are just fine. Here's your chance to prove me wrong in the comments.