NeanderBill

Hot? Not Hot?

@alt_w_v_g @JimmyC1366 Wow. Your wife has you by the balls.

Went to the doctor the other week My wife made the appointment She said I "look tired" I said I am tired She said "not normal tired. Weird tired." I don't know what that means but I went anyway Nice office Fish tank in the lobby Third one this year Signed in at 1:48pm My appointment was at 2:00pm 12 minutes early Because I was raised to believe that matters The receptionist said "the doctor is running a little behind" I said "how far behind" She said "about 45 minutes" I said "so my 2:00 appointment is actually a 2:45 appointment" She said "we appreciate your patience" I said "I haven't shown any yet" My wife grabbed my arm There was a sign behind the desk "Missed appointments without 24-hour notice will incur a $75 fee" The doctor was 45 minutes late Nobody offered me $75 We sat down CNN was playing on mute with subtitles Running a segment about New York City redesigning its trash cans Cost the city $4 million I looked at my wife She said "don't start" Seven magazines on the table All from 2019 I read an article about supply chain disruptions that have since been resolved Very informative My wife was on her phone She looked up and said "WebMD says you might be dehydrated" I said "so we're paying $1,800 for a second opinion on WebMD" She went back to her phone At 2:54pm they called my name A nurse walked me to a room Took my blood pressure Took my temperature Typed for three minutes Then said "the doctor will be right in" I sat on the paper The paper ripped immediately I looked at the wall There was a diagram of a colon Not how I planned to spend my Tuesday 3:19pm The doctor walked in 1 hour and 19 minutes after my scheduled appointment He was looking at his phone Shook my hand without making eye contact Sat down and read my chart for about 30 seconds While I sat there watching him learn who I was He said "so what brings you in today" I said "my wife thinks I look weird tired" He said "what does that mean" I said "I was hoping you'd tell me" He said "when's the last time you had bloodwork done" I said "2019 maybe" He said "we should run a full panel" I said "fine" He asked if I was sleeping well I said "I have three kids and a golden retriever who thinks 3am is a reasonable time to need outside" He said "are you drinking enough water" I said "probably not" He said "that might be it" I said "you think the reason I look weird tired is because I don't drink enough water" He said "dehydration is more common than people think" I said "I've been here over an hour and sat on a piece of paper that ripped to be told to drink water" He said "we'll know more when the bloodwork comes back" I said "when will that be" He said "3 to 5 business days" I said "business days" He said "yes" I said "my blood has business days" He didn't respond Then he said "any other concerns" I said "several. But none you can bill for." He shook my hand again Still no eye contact Total face time with the doctor: 6 minutes Total time in the building: 1 hour and 37 minutes I was examined for approximately 6% of the time I was present I've fired people for better numbers than that My wife was in the waiting room She asked how it went I said "I need to drink water" She said "I told you that last week" I said "yes but now it's a medical opinion so it costs $1,800" She didn't laugh In the car she said "at least now you know you're fine" I said "I was fine when I walked in. I just didn't have the receipt to prove it." She didn't disagree The bloodwork came back four business days later Everything was normal The doctor's office sent a message through their portal It said "results look great. Continue to stay hydrated and follow up in 12 months." Follow up in 12 months To be told to drink water again $1,800 1 hour and 37 minutes 6 minutes of face time One ripped piece of paper And the same advice my wife gave me for free Plz fix. Thx. Sent from my iPhone

@Michelle__Skye @1109Patricia

Joe Biden is writing a Presidential memoir book. What should it be named?

@GregoryRogers7 15

Neither

@FrankKane11 We Irish are okay with this because our people are crazy enough

I am required by Scottish law to post this. Back later

@FrankKane11 Do they make a slapping noise?

My hot wife as far as you know) wanted to remind everyone that it’s HumpDay

@johnondrasik @mkhammer I liked his movie. But, best actor?!

Stud

@atensnut 87

🧐

@ShadowofEzra @DebraDosch No oil for you.

The European Union has rejected President Trump’s call for allied naval support to secure the Strait of Hormuz. The European Union says, “This is not Europe’s war,” and is basically telling the United States, “You’re on your own.” “Nobody wants to go actively into this war.”

@DankArts101 Gorgeous. Do you illustrate for graphic novels?

@AimeeBill2023 How humiliating. He's a cuck.

Sick phucks

@RandyLa35983906 It's like a cartoon

That's gonna have a mark 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@RadioGenoa @CruisersV8 Don't mess with gingers. They've got Irish soccer thug genes

A black boy attacks a white boy from behind and finds out it wasn't a smart move.

@FrankKane11 Is that a trunk or are you just glad to see me?

Goodnight. Here’s a feel good for you for Frisky Friday. Why yes it is another elephant.

@FrankKane11 Don't call him Shirley

Good morning. Pour a cup. It’s Haturday. Do you recognize this dashing revolutionary war hero or the Disney TV series?

Splatterday ? Got to go babysit. Back later

@gregauman How can you not root for this guy?

A message from Mike Evans to Bucs fans: “Forever grateful.”

@FrankKane11 @CacheCuties

@BillRab @CacheCuties Congratulations

Hanging out in Holland's haunted house for the night. (it's friday the 13th) && she's the only cutie i can stand. (the rest are too... bubbly.🙄) don't tell cache. - Reign 🖤 (sfw/wholesome)

@heyitsmeCarolyn @dsware123

What has happened to Natalie Maines from the Dixie Chicks⁉️ 👀