Clown Boat

@BBallzz69 @Gengar11teen @o_lalonde @Andr3jH The correct response to a veteran is "Thank you for your service"

@Gengar11teen @o_lalonde @Andr3jH "I was on the front lines during Gamer Gate" is a sentence that should get you publicly castrated

Explaining how these two images are connected should be part of the American citizenship exam.

@S_CharlesNFL lol no fuckin way did he say this, I won't believe it

Dianna Russini’s husband has finally broken his silence on the recent rumors, saying: “A lot of people still struggle to accept a strong, independent woman thriving in what’s traditionally been a male-dominated industry. Instead of celebrating her success, they try to tear her down with misinformation and noise. But I see the work she puts in every single day, and I couldn’t be more proud of her. She’s earned everything she has. That’s exactly why we supported leaders like Kamala Harris — because empowering strong women isn’t controversial, it’s necessary.”

@CNviolations Gen-Z boss and a sprained ankle

Are you absolutely sure she's not 11 months old?

@jondelarroz @_MichaelSussman Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me 5 times, shame on me.

My insider at Paramount tells me that Star Trek: United from @_MichaelSussman IS going forward, but due to the current deal structures they have in place, they're unable to announce it as of yet. I'll note there is also an IMDB page made for the project already. If my source is correct, this is a HUGE win for Star Trek fans.

@DefiantLs Not making the varsity squad at this rate

42-year-old Jayvee Sangha sentenced to 15 years in prison in connection with the death of actor Matthew Perry

@ReviewsPossum Grug make line on bone. Each day new line. Line reach end, Grug hunt. Not return for 3 nights. Leave woman in cave.

Anthropologist finds a bone with a bunch of notches carved into it: "Clearly, this is some sort of primitive calendar." 40,000 years ago: "Hey Grug, I bet I can fart more times in an hour than you can." "You're on. Here, let me make a score board."

@ennui365 "Hi, I'd like to urgently stop payment on a check. It's made out to Cambridge University and the memo says 'tuition'."

@JimDMiller @GarrettPetersen

@GarrettPetersen Why does someone whose basketball ability places him in the top 0.1% bother to continue practicing basketball?

Why does someone with the face on the left even walk into a surgeon's office? She's basically perfect. Blessed with a 99.9th percentile face. What was the surgeon supposed to improve?

@nypost I didn't know the Patriots were scouting for a new tight end

New England Patriots’ Mike Vrabel and top NY Times NFL reporter Dianna Russini hold hands and hug at luxury hotel trib.al/nsxyMmj

@dpoddolphinpro @NASA If only there was someone experienced in both plumbing and space travel...

TOILET UPDATE: Artemis II Flight Director Rick Henfling says that @NASA no longer believes the frozen vent theory is causing the waste dump problems. Orion Integrity's vent was pointed at the sun for ~2 hours a few days ago, which would have melted any blockage, but there is still something restricting the vent. The current hypothesis is that a chemical reaction with the waste water, used to prevent it developing biofilms, could be generating debris, clogging a filter.

@Symply_rhoda1 You're right, hitting won't solve it. Better to gouge the eyes.

Parents, please stop sending your kids to school with the mindset of “if someone hits you, hit them back.” You are part of the problem.

@jaroondee @michaeloburns It's pretty short, yeah

@michaeloburns So this is a limited series 🤔

I was given advanced access to this show and can confirm that: 1) Yes, he tries it. 2) She dies.

@m_ashcroft @nonregemesse Your police are too busy scanning online posts for hate speech to pursue those thieves

@nonregemesse I'm well aware that there are issues in London, and I call them out when I see them But the existence of crime—which I want to see action on, as you've highlighted—is not the same as the level of disinformation that I see around here

@Amanti_koko @ManMilk2

@DailyMail After we topple Iran's government we should do the UK next

@LokiJulianus I'd bet for every man sent on this mission there were 10 more who volunteered

Are these guys just learning about America for the first time?

@KinkadePau70767 @yamanakanobody @GovTimWalz Legend has it Tampon Tim was born on a heavy flow day, under a blood moon

@yamanakanobody Some liberals believe that men need tampons. They are apparently for their bleeding manginas. Tim needs the largest size. @GovTimWalz

なぁ！海外の兄弟から聞いたんだが、 ミネソタ州の元知事、ティム・ウォルツは、納税者の税金を投じて、高校の男子トイレに女性用衛生用品を設置しました。それが彼に「タンポン・ティム」というあだ名をもたらしました。 って言われたんだけど笑笑 どうなってんだよ！

@anas_chaudhry11 @LeadingReport Your name is Anus

Man, if this is actually true and Trump really got rushed to Walter Reed... damn, Easter just got a whole lot better 😂🍿 Let's be real this guy has been nothing but a disaster for America. Dividing the country even more, pushing crazy policies that hurt regular people, tanking our image abroad, and making everything about his ego. Four years of chaos was enough, and now he's back doing the same damage again. His "leadership" has only brought more hate, more lies, and more problems for everyday Americans. If something serious is happening and he doesn't make it... honestly? It might just be the blessing this country needs right now. A real chance to heal and move forward without all that toxic noise dragging us down every single day. The replies are popping off and I get it after everything he's put us through, a lot of people are done pretending. Fingers crossed the rumors are true this time. America deserves better than this mess

BREAKING: President Trump has not been hospitalized.

@ravseg_sopdyl @jon_stokes They're trained on reddit which is just a collection of snarky political headlines

@jon_stokes This really demands a proper explanation and I haven't seen one

They can't not do it, even when writing code

@FaraKlara @malph0 @rylandsgrace @LinkofSunshine This snippet mixes past and present tense

@malph0 @rylandsgrace @LinkofSunshine Dawg no it's not

he should’ve been at the club