The_Count_of_Haunted_Crisco

@windowsinsider Fire everyone responsible for ads and copilot, and reduce both to zero. MAYBE then your words might mean something.

Our commitment to Windows quality aka.ms/WindowsQuality…

@zacbowden Too late. They’ll be Microslop forever

BREAKING: Microsoft just announced several major changes to Windows 11 in an effort to win back user trust and evolve the platform into something people will actually want to use over macOS and Linux! It's a huge announcement that addresses Windows 11's biggest problems today, tackling core fundamental issues such as unreliable system performance, UX consistency, AI bloat and general enshittification. Microsoft has confirmed that this year, it WILL be reducing where ads and Copilot appear throughout the system, including in Start, Widgets, Notepad, Photos, and more! File Explorer and Windows Search will be upgraded with improved performance and capabilities that make finding apps and files much faster and easier. The OS will become lighter with less RAM and system utilization at idle, making it smoother to run on low end hardware with limited memory. These improvements will also benefit high-end PCs too. Windows Update will be improved with more granular controls and the ability to postpone updates for longer, along with reducing how often the OS needs to restart to install an update. Microsoft has also confirmed that it's bringing back fan favourite features such as the ability to move the Taskbar! It's also working to update more areas of the system shell with modern WinUI designs, which should make Windows 11 feel more coherent and complete. There's much more in the announcement, and it honestly all sounds too good to be true. Microsoft really is listening to feedback, and is eager to make Windows the BEST desktop OS on the market. More details including when these changes will arrive in the link! windowscentral.com/microsoft/wind…

@LemmySmackett Having a latino get a good price for rice killed the immersion for me.

"Jesus, Paul, look at this receipt—ten dollars for a single potato. This new Value-Mart AI surge pricing is killing me, man. Killing me." “That’s nothing, Bill. Wait ’til the next update: the store will be able to see exactly how much money you have in your bank.” “You’re kidding.” “And your 401k.” “@#$% me sideways.” “That’s why I use URCHN to do my groceries.” “Really? What’s URCHN?” “URCHN is the latest in affordable concierge shopping.” “Oh, you mean like Uber or Instacart. What makes them different?” “Orphans.” “𝑂𝑟𝑝ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑠?” “That’s right, Bill. And not just any orphans. Dirty, starving orphans who live under overpasses.” “Uuuh.” “As you know, the cameras in the grocery aisle scan your face and adjust the price based on race, socioeconomic status, and dietary restrictions. But you know who always gets the best prices, no matter what?” “…orphans?” “Yep.” “I don’t know, Paul, that seems a little-” “Of course, the AI still discriminates based on race, which is why they send a multi-racial team of no less than four dirty orphans to buy your groceries.” "Um." “The Latino child buys your rice, and the Asian child buys your tortillas.” “Yeah, no, I get it.” “And the black child-” “Sorry, uh, these are children, right? Small children?” “Of course. Teens would raise the price.” “How do they, uh, reach the items on the top shelves?” “They stand on each other’s emaciated little shoulders.” "Jesus." "Yeah, the Hispanic orphan tends to be on the bottom." "What?" "Sturdy stock." “…and how much do you save?” “My last potato was 34 cents.” “#$&@ it, I’m in.” --- [r][title: AI Surge Pricing]

@Kneon Inshallah

Copilot will be the death of this company.

@GoodVibePolitik I think if you ignore how well they do when declaring someone the “better” candidate you look like a clown.

@CountHaunted I think if you judge candidate value purely on the percentage of votes they get on a primary and not what they stand for or the myriad factors that affect those percentages you’re missing a lot of the mark here

Gonna be honest everyone’s been attacking Bushra over Kat’s loss but every progressive I know in district voted for her or admitted to me that Kat should’ve dropped out to back her. She was a better candidate with deep roots in district while Kat was seen as a vanity campaign.

@rushicrypto The orange depression

If the last one was named “The Great” Depression, what’s this one going to be called?

@NVIDIAGeForce @RevolutionAndre How does it look with DLSS 5? Hmmmmm?

Experience DLSS 4 in Nioh 3. #RTXOn. 🎥: @RevolutionAndre

@NateSilver538 @SpecialPuppy1 Leaving this up for this long is so embarrassing lol

@SpecialPuppy1 26% of the vote seems kinda shitty idk, it's not like she lost 50-46

There's plenty of appetite for progressivism, etc., within the Democratic electorate, but the Very Online version of it doesn't really travel well.

@xvshoota A lot more than coconut cake 🤢

who actually eats carrot cake

I'm begging y'all to realize that Gaza is a niche issue that 97% of people are not going to be considering when casting a ballot. Social media is not real life.

@FortunateFolk Shenanigans

Umm… switch 2 and pokopia giveaway cuz why not, might double the reward if lots of people join Only requirement is comment

@Eve_Barlow Classic Fartlow. Ain’t nobody reading your pro-imperialism essay.

What Javier Bardem did within the most elite echo chamber inside the Oscars theatre is as morally contemptible as anything Harvey Weinstein did. He signalled that human rights don’t matter. Freedom for 90 million Iranians doesn’t matter. Ridding the world of the biggest financiers of terrorism doesn’t matter. Blaming it all on the Jewish people is the name of the game. FREE PALESTINE, and resounding applause. A room that has been curated by pushing anyone with decency and common sense out of sight. The same psychology is behind both men and both collectives. Narcissism. To behave like an entitled gangster in broad daylight and be protected by an industry of loons who have convinced themselves that they’ve evicted the patriarchy is a joke. They have built a new Titanic. Armed to the teeth by self-congratulatory terrorist apologists. Bardem, like Weinstein, made a fool of himself and everyone in Hollywood. Anyone next to him would be shunned to infinity if the world was anywhere near sane. And the biggest coward in all of this is the Jew who is protecting him. Ari Emmanuel.

@KalshiNewsroom @yashar God I hope they bury you parasites

@yashar Sadly, a state can file charges on paper thin arguments. As other courts have recognized and the CFTC affirms, Kalshi is subject to federal jurisdiction and it should not be overseen by a patchwork of inconsistent state laws.

@EdishereWA @belikesagee Better to let people think you’re dumb than post this comment on twitter and confirm it.

@belikesagee People with kids got it made bro , they get a FAT Tax return while people with out kids get penalized? People with kids get easy food stamps mostly if you’re not white , you get bank 🏦 , also they get WIC & food stamps . Again we can’t kuz we don’t have kids . The system sucks

my salary is not even enough but my co-worker with a wife and 3 kids is living on the same salary

@HarmlessYardDog Thought he was talking about the show

They don't call them fireflies in Dixie.

@ferretbranca Hey it’s great if you make at least $200,000 per year!

in a bad place right now (northern virginia)

@ClintonThought It’s 2026. I expect people to be both.

Are you an Abughazaleh supporter, or are you gay? Choose wisely.

@KeruboSk Going to bed smelling like outside sure is a choice

Apparently there are people who shower at night instead of the morning. I genuinely want to understand this. Night shower people… explain yourselves

@TimmyFacciola_ Why the fuck are we asking the mayor of New York City about Irish unification???

Zohran Mamdani on whether he supports a united Ireland: "I gotta be honest, I haven't thought enough on that question."