Danielle Holdsworth

@SoVeryBritish Get a wiggle/wriggle on!

Today as I was sitting in my car at a crossing, watching a pedestrian stop in the middle of said crossing to check something in their shopping bag, I was thinking about all the ways British people have to say “hurry up!” Let me know if I’ve missed any… In your own time Anytime today While we’re young Come on, I haven’t got all day Take your time Get a bloody move on Sometime this century Let’s have some urgency, shall we? Chop chop Get your skates on Don’t mind me, it’s not like I’m busy or anything

Why isn't there a southern hemisphere equivalent of The Lions? @lionsofficial @AllBlacks @wallabies @Springboks @lospumas

The blood is pumping listening to TMS!!

I really hope they had a shit in the woods! #stereotype

Sometimes, it's easier to seek forgiveness than ask for permission. This is one of those times!

@SoVeryBritish Ouch. Said through very gritted teeth!

“Hi guys, have you eaten with us before? Okay, let me explain the concept. If you scan the QR code you’ll see a menu with a selection of small plates that come out in no particular order. We suggest ordering 3-4 each, even though each one costs the same as a regular main course. Just to let you know, the plates, some of which will actually be roof tiles or chopping boards, will require more room than the table provides. Seeing as there are two of you, we’ll make sure each dish contains three items. The meal will cost three figures and you won’t be full. “At the end you can pay the bill via another QR code, and that bill will include a service charge, but then we’ll ask if you also want to tip an extra 12, 15, or 20 percent on top of that, so hopefully you’ll get confused and tip twice. You’ll also incur a £1 admin charge for paying via the QR code. Can I get you any bread for the table for a £5 charge I’m not going to mention?”

@SoVeryBritish a Harris hawk terrorising tall men in Hertfordshire and the King playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on a recorder made out of a carrot. Could the BBC 1 o'clock news have been more British?

@amolrajan So glad UCL Jack said out loud what millions of us at home say every week "I don't even understand the question!"

No mention of tea in any form. Have I clicked on the wrong site? I fear you may not get the job with that glaring omission 😞 (but otherwise spot on)

@SoVeryBritish And in a complete ying-yang moment this morning, after 21 years together, my husband made me the worst cup of tea ever!

I just made a cup of tea that was a noticeable cut above my usual standard. Might be one of the best cups of tea I’ve ever made. I doubt I’ll make one that satisfying for a long while to come. I did absolutely nothing different.

OK then, I must toddle off!

@SoVeryBritish Ham sandwich on white bread (no mustard, no mayo), plain crisps (on the verge of expiry date), water. Bleurgh!

If Monday was a supermarket meal deal, what combination would it be?

@ThatBloke_Jesus Dude, make sure there are no buns on the menu....

Looking forward to the first Supper with the boys tonight Said we should make it a yearly thing

@neighbours Believable, emotional acting from Majella Davis & Stefan Dennis

@bushontheradio Please play The Model by Kraftwork for Dani in Guildford as I finish a quiet week at work. Thanks. Dani

Request a song or die!

@bushontheradio You have inflicted unnecessary cold on the nation this weekend. You should feel ashamed and I'm disappointed in you Bush. Hang your head in shame #BringBackBCP

Oh shit

@SoVeryBritish Apple & Blackcurrant - hands down

People who drink squash - what’s the best flavour?

@Number10cat Did he bring treats?

Relax everyone, he just popped by to see me

@bushontheradio @RichieFirth not a favourite tunnel but a tunnel fact: the Blackwall Tunnel has a bend in it so that back in the day, the horses couldn't see the light at the end and bolt towards it! #tunnelfact

@SoVeryBritish I'd die for a cup of tea. Oh wait.....

What’s the first thing a British person would say upon getting into heaven? I reckon: “when’s bin day?”