Emily

@Edler_John It’s under her high-waisted bottoms you idiot.

I might be dumb, but like, the belly button isn’t there. So something happened to it. We’re all just trying to figure out what happened

@Edler_John Wrong.

I’m not saying we should be rooting for it, but it would be funny if this place goes bankrupt, right?

@Edler_John Folx

Prayers up for those 500 folks

@Edler_John Insensitive!

Puts the whole Ukraine Russia thing into perspective. Can’t be worrying about what’s going on in Eastern Europe when we’re getting a little taste of summer in early March!

@Edler_John 7/10 I smiled

3/ don’t try to write a list of 10,000,000 things. You run out quicker than you think! 😂 😆

2021 was a BIG year for me and Kettle, Inc. It marked the first year Kettle, Inc. had $10,000,000 in annual revenue. For fun 🤩 🤪 😜 here’s a list of 10,000,000 things I learned along the way!! 🧵 🧵 🪡 🪡

@Edler_John Eh. 1/10

@Edler_John 0/10 Super weak joke here. I would just remove entirely. Just a suggestion.

I’ll be either dead or in Jail

@Edler_John 2.5/10

I feel like the range of these half court prizes is too big. Some for a million, this one for $7,500. As President, I will regulate the hell out of this and make sure all #Americans will shoot the half court shots for #EqualPay

Jared Polis : Grant Clemency or gove commutation with time served to Rogel Lazaro Aguilera-Mederos - Sign the Petition! chng.it/mNSWKZYw via @Change

@Edler_John @Everyone I’ll give you a wedgie

Hey @everyone, when I grow up and I’m big and strong, I’m bringing back noogies and wedgies. This is your final warning

@Edler_John 10 years too long. Deducting points since this is boring 1/10

Jesus, I’ve been on this app for 10 years? Sheesh! #MyTwitterAnniversary

@Edler_John A little insensitive 3/10

“We gotta start killing people to get this country’s economy back on track! All good economies are built on murder! Kill foreigners, aliens… idk, kill Americans, it doesn’t matter! Just make sure you use Raytheon!” - Raytheon CEO after 2 high noons

@Edler_John 2.5/10

BREAKING: Johnny Kettle screaming obscenities at clouds and over-drafting his bank account to over-invest in crypto after drinking too much in the final days of October, 2021, was not caused by misconduct or negligence, and doesn’t recommend disciplinary action - AP

@Edler_John 1/10

I hate Big Lightbulb (Big L). They’re always different colors and it’s tearing this country apart. I’m anti Big L!

@Edler_John This is funnier. 6/10

I finally received the J&J vax. So now I have the two Moderna, the two Pfizer, the J&J and 3 flu shots. I think I’m ready to have a couple wings and watch college football with my friends (outside)!

@Edler_John 3.5/10

Haven’t stepped on a crack in about a week and my mom’s back is finally starting to get better 🙌🙌

@Edler_John This is mean!!!!!

I’m going to start a podcast for the deaf. It’ll have nothing said, but a slightly different length each week and an inspirational title like “Keep your head up - week 42” or “Believe in YOU - week 17”

Thank you @ProfJPizzo for the most inspiring afternoon! In the middle of a hectic week, you reminded me why I want to be a teacher in the first place ❤️ #teachertwitter