Favour Obirinma Nwanne

My wife cheated on me 1 year into our marriage. She confessed when confronted with the evidence, cried and begged for forgiveness, and swore never to repeat her mistake. In the 16 years that have passed, she has cheated 4 more times (that I know about). 3 kids have complicated the situation now, and I don't have the freedom to leave without consequences like I did the first time. My marriage is now 40% good and 60% hell. I am basically trapped, and it is a miserable situation. What would be your sincere advice to him?

Promoting decency and elegance should be a thing. Dressing this way makes you look rich and honorable.🥰

Elders say that when a man loses his footing, the ground shakes for everyone around him. Everything I will be saying here is the wisdom I got from my father. Let me tell you one hard truth. Your husband is not fighting you; he is fighting his own shame. You said he took over a successful family business and brought it to ruin right? While you thrive? That is a huge confidence breaker. His demand to take over your business is not about the children needing attention. It is a desperate attempt to feel like a leader and a provider again. No let anyone whine you. And here you are. You do not want to lose your business and you do not want to lose your marriage. But there is a way our mothers handled it. A lot of our grandmothers were very wealthy market women, sometimes richer than their husbands. But they understood that a man's ego will never allow him to sit at home and watch his wife feed him everyday. If you fight him head on over ownership, he will become toxic and he will find faults in everything you do just to prove he is the head of the house. Don’t go that route. Instead, our mothers survived this by practicing invisible leadership. They gave the man influence without handing over the treasury. Firstly, do not fight him face to face. Bring in that one uncle or elder he respects deeply. Let the elder soften the ground and make him see that taking your shop will not rebuild his father's company. After the elder has spoken, sit him down and make him the chairman of your business. Let him handle the big suppliers, the landlords, or the government people. Give him a title that commands respect when he steps outside. But keep the bank tokens and the daily market operations in your own hands. You also have to feed his need to lead. Consult him on things you already have the answers to. Ask him if you should buy ten cartons or fifteen, even when you know you are buying fifteen. It makes him feel in charge of the family vision. Then, if the business is making good profit, free up some capital for him. Tell him you want him to use his experience to start a new branch or a completely different venture. Give him his own project to build. When a man has his own vision to chase, he will stop fighting you for yours. That is how you keep your home peaceful and protect the sweat of your hands. Allah knows best.

Elders say that when a man loses his footing, the ground shakes for everyone around him. Everything I will be saying here is the wisdom I got from my father. Let me tell you one hard truth. Your husband is not fighting you; he is fighting his own shame. You said he took over a successful family business and brought it to ruin right? While you thrive? That is a huge confidence breaker. His demand to take over your business is not about the children needing attention. It is a desperate attempt to feel like a leader and a provider again. No let anyone whine you. And here you are. You do not want to lose your business and you do not want to lose your marriage. But there is a way our mothers handled it. A lot of our grandmothers were very wealthy market women, sometimes richer than their husbands. But they understood that a man's ego will never allow him to sit at home and watch his wife feed him everyday. If you fight him head on over ownership, he will become toxic and he will find faults in everything you do just to prove he is the head of the house. Don’t go that route. Instead, our mothers survived this by practicing invisible leadership. They gave the man influence without handing over the treasury. Firstly, do not fight him face to face. Bring in that one uncle or elder he respects deeply. Let the elder soften the ground and make him see that taking your shop will not rebuild his father's company. After the elder has spoken, sit him down and make him the chairman of your business. Let him handle the big suppliers, the landlords, or the government people. Give him a title that commands respect when he steps outside. But keep the bank tokens and the daily market operations in your own hands. You also have to feed his need to lead. Consult him on things you already have the answers to. Ask him if you should buy ten cartons or fifteen, even when you know you are buying fifteen. It makes him feel in charge of the family vision. Then, if the business is making good profit, free up some capital for him. Tell him you want him to use his experience to start a new branch or a completely different venture. Give him his own project to build. When a man has his own vision to chase, he will stop fighting you for yours. That is how you keep your home peaceful and protect the sweat of your hands. Allah knows best.

Y’all think making money is so easy.. if tables turned, all men would happily cook, clean and be submissive

They are saying you can snatch some Nigerian men with food It's so funny but sounds true 😁 I'm just imagining it Make them snatch my man with Egusi soup ke I go write petition to the IG of police 😭😭

In a home where both husband and wife work and earn, domestic staff is necessary. The wife should bear full responsibility for their remuneration. Why? Because tradition is clear: the husband’s duty is to go out, work, and provide completely for his wife and children while the wife stays home to cook, clean, and raise the family. Now that she has chosen to abandon those responsibilities and enter the workforce, it is only fair that she pays the domestic staff with her own money. That should not be a burden for her. It is completely unfair for a working wife to skip household chores while her husband still foots the bill for domestic staff. What exactly is she doing with her earnings? Her money, her chores. She must choose: either remain a stay-at-home wife and handle the domestic duties herself, or go out to earn, hire staff, and pay them from her own pocket. Personally, I can accept domestic staff for other chores, but cooking is non-negotiable. My wife must prepare my food. I desire her cooking, not anyone else’s. Kindly and respectfully share your thoughts on this. Above all, love God.

A man can love two women at the same time: his mother and his woman. But Yoruba and Urhobo men have mastered the art of loving three to four women simultaneously.