Fiona Phillips

A reminder to all my friends across the UK that British Summer Time starts tonight at 1am so don’t forget to put your clocks forward an hour and get your snow shovels ready!

That was an exciting finale! I thought I had figured it out but there were unexpected twists! And plenty of unanswered questions to get us excited for S16! There was just one thing wrong with the episode, but I have put it right in this screenshot… 🦎💚 #deathinparadise

@snigrintrigrin Oh, do give over!

#deathinparadise is a totally pointless, yet expensive production. Is it just set so a load of BBC crew and cast can jolly it up in Guadeloupe at the license payers expense?? Could have created it far cheaper in the Isle of Wight!!

@SparkyGareth @tfwrail Also, who wants to arrive at 01.30 in the morning! And how do we get home - no buses at that time of night - and limited, if any, taxis?

@tfwrail I said West of Carmarthen. Carmarthen is 15 miles up the line. There are no trains West of Carmarthen after the 19.39 from Cardiff. You've got Whitland/Narberth/Haverfordwest/Tenby/Pembroke/Millford Haven etc etc. And it can't be done by train.

Would have been nice to go to tonight's game by train and have a few beers but oh dear last train from Cardiff to West of Carmarthen leaves at 19.39 Kick off at 19.45. Well done @tfwrail 👏👏👏. It's all about rail around Cardiff etc no thought for us down her West Wales.

I heard a squeaky toy but my dogs were inside. Found this little guy living his best life! 🐿️ 😍

@davemorrissey64 @ITVX Absolutely outstanding performance from @davemorrissey64 . @TeamEveMyles wasn't half bad too! I think I suspected everyone, at one point or another, but the ending still came from left field.

On ⁦@ITVX⁩

There are only two problems with 'independent regulators' like Ofcom and Ofwat; they're not independent and they don't regulate

Oh now, won’t this be a great evening! 💚

@AisLPhillips My favourite is: "You worry too much." "No, I worry exactly the right amount." I could have written that.

@FionaPhillips One of my favourite quotes from this film. I’m sure this was improvised between Kenneth Branagh and Kevin Kline!

@chefsevenn That would be me. @AisLPhillips

Is… is there anyone who actually likes olives? Are we sure those people exist? Who buys olives to consume? I demand you reveal yourselves 🫒

😆😆😆 #archaeohistories

Happy St Patrick’s Day from Shaun and the flock! ☘️ #HappyStPatricksDay #LuckOfTheIrish #StPatricksDay

Remembering my mother, today and every day. Thinking of all those who are remembering someone they love today. Happy Mother’s Day. W

@deathinparadise I am so using the phrase “This egg’s harder than Vinnie Jones” from now on!

2/2 And that ending was very unexpected for Mervin - looks like there will be 3 of us for breakfast! @DonGilet #DeathInParadise

"Welsh Water set to pay out £44.7m over sewage spills Ofwat said it found “serious and unacceptable” breaches in Welsh Water’s sewage works systems and operations." And here's the really scary part in all of this, none of this, none of it would have come to light had it not been for you, the general public, you're the heroes in all of this, the ones that stand in our rivers, that are prepared to be counted, that are prepared to hold authority to account. My respect. 👏👏👏 independent.co.uk/news/business/…

“Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?” Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote the following response: A few things spring to mind. Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem. For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed. So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump’s limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief. Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever. I don’t say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman. But with Trump, it’s a fact. He doesn’t even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty. Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers. And scarily, he doesn’t just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness. There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It’s all surface. Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront. Well, we don’t. We see it as having no inner world, no soul. And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist. Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that. He’s not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat. He’s more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege. And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully. That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead. There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down. So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think ‘Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy’ is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that: • Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are. • You don’t need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man. This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss. After all, it’s impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum. God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid. He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart. In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump. And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish: ‘My God… what… have… I… created?' If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.

Labour was built on the belief that justice must never belong only to the powerful. Today MPs vote on restricting jury trials. For Labour MPs it’s a test of principle. The poorest & most marginalised depend on juries. Today we’ll see who remembers why they came into politics.