Sedgwick's Ghost

@joncoopertweets Trump, so he can stand trial

Orbán, Putin, Netanyahu and Trump are in a rowboat that’s sinking in the middle of a lake. You can only save one of them — who would you choose?

@smc429 Sanitysgone

Pop Quiz!

@mariana057 I love your rye humor.

If I had a nickel for every pun I’ve ever posted, I'd have a pun per nickel.

@Judianna One Monkey

The One Commandment. 😎

@mariana057 They also have the best digs

Why do archaeologists get all the girls? Because they have the best dating techniques.

@ChrisMartzWX Those numbers are more anthem than random.

867-5309

@MJMcKean At least she didn't dress like a kumquat. That would be a step too far

A tale as old as time.

@Noirchick1 One of the great failings of Hollywood is that Claude Rains never won an Oscar even though he was nominated 4 times in a span of 8 years.

No matter who else is in the scene, you cannot help but watch only him. His presence leaps at you, even here at age 23, before he hit Hollywood and appeared in some of the most well-known films of all time... Who is he?

@gtconway3d @realDonaldTrump Who are you and what have you done with the real George Conway?

I must respectfully agree to disagree here with my friend Julia. @realDonaldTrump is one of the most honest people in government service today—if not ever. His integrity is unimpeachable and unmatched. As he himself has so forthrightly explained on so many occasions, "I think I’m the most honest human being, perhaps, that God ever created." The truth of that statement is utterly beyond dispute. Accordingly, I cannot accept the suggestion that the president could have made a statement to a journalist without regard to its truth or falsity in order to manipulate the financial markets. It's also beyond any question that, as the most honest president in our nation's history, he has surrounded himself only with people who are themselves highly ethical and completely incorruptible. Accordingly, although Julia has not made any such assertion, I reject any suggestion that it could be even remotely possible that anyone in Donald Trump's close or even extended circle might engage in any profitable front-running or insider trading based upon any advance knowledge they may have had of the president's statement. That would be inconceivable, because just like our president, the people who surround him are among the most selfless and patriotic people in America, and would never, ever put their own personal financial interests ahead of the nation's well-being. We should all thank them profusely for their probity and sacrifice. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

@mariana057 Well, when you were that weight you wore diapers so some things have improved.

It's hard to believe I used to be 6 lbs, 4 oz. I've really let myself go!

@DocAtCDI That's because it's the principle of the thing

I have a mortgage joke, but nobody's interested.

@DocAtCDI That's a real stretch

There is a famous musical group called the TROJANS. Also known as the Rubber Band.

@DocAtCDI Ivan the Terrible's grandfather was Ivan the Great. I want to know who came between. Ivan the Mediocre?

Last night on Dancing With The Tsars, Peter and Catherine were great, but Ivan was terrible.

@DocAtCDI I'm actually longing for the days when politicians did nothing.

I can't believe I was arrested for impersonating a politician... I was just sitting there doing nothing.

Trump: "I stopped 8 wars." Reality: Trump started more wars than he stopped

@hazelflag It's OK, you're entitled to your opinion...no mattter how wrong it may be. Young Frankenstein still makes me laugh.

Am I the only person here who finds Mel Brooks' movies uniformly unfunny? I apologize in advance to his fans and admirers.

@DocAtCDI I went to UMASS and always like the name Belchertown. I will never lose a 12 year old's sense of humor.

Where is everyone from? I'm from Massachusetts. That's right, Athol. Not Ware...nope, what's that, Natick? Did I stutter? Athol. Well, then I moved to Orange... You glad? :-)

The definitive character that had roughly 15 minutes or less in a film, but had a huge impact on it!

@MrPitbull07 Tomato sauce. I know a tomato is technically a fruit but, hey close enough.

If you grew up in a “vegetables at every meal” household….what did you eat with spaghetti?

@JaredEMoskowitz Yeah, but just for the material he gives you for the comedy act.

Mine is Comer