Van Coversions L20

@SimonBrodkin Very funny. Do you want to do this as a career when you grow up?

🏆 Best caption wins a pair of tickets to one of my 20 extra tour shows.

@cctvidiots Where you born female?

@HumansNoContext Where you born female?

@AnfieldWatch A fully fit thiago is a rare thing but he gets in most teams in the world imo.

When he's fully fit, does Thiago Alcantara make it into Liverpool's strongest XI this season? 🇪🇸🤔 If so, which two players would compliment him the best? 👇

@Jaack Our top class players are to old or gone for young players to see a quality future (salah mane firmino van dyke) started the rebuild a year or 2 too late to be attractive to top players.

Serious question, why are so many class footballers turning down Liverpool? I don’t get it?

@clownworld Axe you your permission???

@ScouseCommie @kat_lfc13 It can be in both their hands. If two boxers enter the ring, you could say to either of them “the title is in your hands. All you have to do is win.”

@kat_lfc13 But that's the same of City, and it can't be in both their hands.

How are they saying it's still in Arsenal's hands when City have two games in hand? It literally isn't.

@WelsbyElton By that logic only gay men are sexist.

My girlfriend. Now call me racist you clowns.

Protesting at Thatcher’s funeral. I want this lady to be me Nan.

@stefan80sm @TheFigen_ Absolute nonsense anyway. A car window would not come down that easy. Been an auto glazer for 30

@TheFigen_ Good to know, yes. I never leave the house without 2 plungers.

Anyone who enjoys brutally killing a fox for fun is a cnut. Please pass it on ...

What’s the best name you’ve seen for a British business?

@l_rxm_ Instead of south end wanna be’s ?

North Liverpool is mad yeno proper Frank Gallaghers everywhere

Whenever I tweet about a charity needing money, there's always the odd moron with 9 followers who says "You're rich. You pay it" That's missing the point. Charities thrive on awareness. Tweeting about it to 15 million people is the point. Just RT if that's all you can afford 🙏

@ladbible Call it soccer

What is something you should NEVER do in the UK?

If you clapped nurses on your doorstep during Covid, clap them on the picket lines on 15th December. Fair pay for nurses now! Fund our NHS!

@Liverpool Bert n ernie.

Wrong answers only - who are these two?

@Shadyblues117 @TheFigen_ You horrible cunt!

@SoVeryBritish Tory amos. Professional widow. Scabby dick.

What’s your favourite misheard lyric?

Brits of a certain generation will always know that although her love has got no money, he’s got his trombelese.

@NoContextBrits Give in. Don’t like a test.

Twat.