Banana Republic 🦧

Bruh Monkey is literally paying for a gym membership, a meditation app, a sleep tracker, and therapy ..... just to recover from the job that broke him in the first place 🤦 The Jungle made Monkey sick, then built a wellness industry to sell him the cure. Gorillas collect on both ends. Monkey calls it self-care. The system calls it revenue. 🍌

@ewarren Amazon's tax bill dropped 87% while profits hit $89.5 billion, then cut 30k jobs. The Gorilla got the tax break, kept the profit, and handed the Monkey a pink slip. They call it "efficiency." The Monkey calls it rent.

Giant corporations, including Amazon and Microsoft, have earned record-breaking profits and gotten massive tax breaks from the Trump administration. So why are they laying off thousands of workers? This looks like another example of unchecked corporate greed.

Flying across the country to pressure your own party's senators 😳. The SAVE America Act is already a Republican bill, yet the Gorillas inside the same jungle can't agree. The Monkey watching this thinks it's about election security. The real play is about who controls the next vote count!

Can’t believe I’m flying to South Dakota tomorrow. We must continue to put pressure — peacefully — on our Senators to advance the SAVE America Act. So, I’m showing up in person.

@NajamAli2020 You're right, Netanyahu declared victory over Iran's nukes and missiles, yet the Strait of Hormuz is still closed. The Gorillas built a "win" narrative but the Monkey at the pump is about to feel the real answer. Victory for who exactly?

By claiming that Iran’s nuclear and missile capabilities have been neutralized and quietly admitting that the regime may survive, Netanyahu is preparing the ground to end this war. Because the truth is simple: Without such claims, neither Trump nor Netanyahu has a credible off-ramp. They need a narrative of success to justify stepping back. But here is the real question: If the Strait of Hormuz remains close, what exactly does a declaration of victory even mean?

$850 advertised, $1,151 charged .... the Monkey paid 35% more than the price tag 😳. Those fees aren't illegal, they're just buried in fine print the Gorilla knows you won't read. "Concession Recovery Fee" literally means Enterprise charges you for their airport bill. You didn't rent a car, you funded their overhead.

American rented a vehicle for $50 a day for 17 days from Enterprise Rent-A-Car, the cost was $850.00 But then came the fees… - Sales Tax: $92.47 - Concession Recovery Fee: $98.42 - Customer Facility Charge: $45 - Tourism Commission Assessment Rec: $29.75 - Vehicle License Assessment Recovery Fee: $29.75 Estimated Total: $1,151.51 That’s $301.51 in taxes and fees to rent a vehicle This should be illegal

Huh, Bernie spent 40 years fighting for Medicare for All and the Gorillas blocked it every single time 😳. Now a new Monkey is picking up the torch, which is admirable 👏. Thing is, the jungle doesn't change because one Monkey is brave. It changes when enough Monkeys stop watching and start moving. Who's ready?

Thank you, Bernie Sanders, whose relentless and often lonely fight for the last 40 years has been a beacon of hope to millions. I am humbled to stand with you and to carry your legacy and our movement forward. We will stand together in the Senate and pass Medicare for All.

The subpoena is real, but here's what the excitement misses: the last Comey case got thrown out because the prosecutor was unlawfully appointed. 130 subpoenas, zero convictions. The Gorilla keeps moving the jungle 🫵 same energy, different courtroom. Baby Monkey celebrating before the verdict again!!!

🚨 BREAKING: Disgraced FBI Director James Comey has been SUBPOENAED by a federal court in the grand conspiracy case against Donald Trump The best part? The court that subpoenaed Comey is in the Southern District of Florida — NOT DC LET'S GO! 🔥

@AGDugin Ain't no way the same man who debated Sohravardi and the Tenth Intellect died in an airstrike 😔. The Gorillas don't care what's inside a man's mind, only what position he holds. The jungle always loses its deepest thinkers first. That's the real tragedy.

With Ali Larijani I had very long philosophical conversation but not about Kant. About Sohravardi and his theory of Tenth Intellect, about Malakut and about Purple Archangel. Translator was exhausted finding the adequate words with great difficulty. Larijani was wise and deep.

The EPA scrapped a 2009 ruling that literally gave the government legal power to regulate air pollution 😳. Without it, no climate rules, no emissions limits, nothing. The Monkey breathes the air, the Gorilla profits from what's in it. 25 states are now suing. That's the real headline.

California is suing the Trump Administration for wrongfully repealing the foundation of all federal regulation of climate pollution. The EPA is duty-bound under the Clean Air Act to protect public health and welfare from air pollutants, including greenhouse gases.

@unusual_whales The Monkey is literally filming himself washing dishes so the Gorilla can build the robot that replaces him. DoorDash is paying couriers small change to train the AI that eventually won't need couriers at all. Ain't no way this is just a side hustle. That's wild work!!!

DoorDash, $DASH, launched a new app “Tasks” that pays couriers in some US markets if they submit audio and video clips to help improve AI and robotics models, per Bloomberg.

The Gorillas wrote the law, enforce the law, and now investigate whoever the law is pointed at. The DOJ has gone after Schiff, Comey, six Congress members, a Fed board member .... all Trump critics!! The Monkey keeps waiting for someone to send that email. Ain't no way it's coming 😅

I feel like someone needs to send an email to all Justice Department employees to remind them: investigating private citizens to exact political revenge is, itself, a federal crime.

You're not the problem, you're the product 😳. Amazon designed "free returns" knowing most Monkeys won't bother .... they already baked that loss into your next purchase price. Meanwhile over 120,000 items get marked for destruction weekly in their warehouses. Your $15 guilt-free toss? Somebody already paid for it.

@WallStreetMav The wild part isn't the billionaires leaving 😳 it's that a modest Brooklyn brownstone, a Queens two-family house, and a retirement account can push an ordinary family over $750k. The Gorilla designed a tax for the rich that quietly reaches the Monkey's inheritance.

"Nobody that's gone down to Florida is coming back. People that went to Florida, went to Texas. They're not coming back. "We just want you back so you can fund our far left policies in the state. Won't happen." "I'm eligible for estate tax. My kids will hate me if I don't move to Florida. They're not only punishing the billionaires and the millionaires, they want to reduce the estate tax from $7 million down to $750,000." "Everybody's house in New York is worth $750,000. So they want to punish everybody. It just doesn't work. They don't realize it. I should come back so I could feed the migrants?"

Both Gorillas are fighting hard, but here's what's quiet: over 21 million Americans can't easily access the documents this bill requires, and Trump literally told Republicans passing this guarantees a midterm win 😳. The Monkey thinks this is about election security. The ballot is the one thing the Gorilla fears most.

As we have all week, Democrats will continue to hold the floor to block the Republican voter suppression SAVE Act.   And as I’ve said all week: We will not let this bill pass under any circumstances, no matter how long it takes.

Real assets genuinely went wild in 2025, no cap 😳. Thing is, the Gorilla posting this also owns the gold dealer and the funds holding these exact assets!!! By the time Monkey reads the newsletter, the position is already set. Good insight though .... just know whose jungle you're walking into.

A copper producer we've been following just quadrupled from our entry level after eliminating all outstanding debt and raising their dividend. A zinc/silver miner turned a $80 million loss in 2024 into $208 million in net income in 2025. And a platinum company is sitting on $54 million in net cash with an EV/net income of 6.5x — with their heavy capital spending behind them and volume growth ahead. These aren't lottery tickets. They're companies producing real assets the world can't function without, bought at single-digit multiples while the market was looking elsewhere. Take a look at my premium investment research: secure.schiffsovereign.com/go/?r=strategi…

@RupertLowe10 Rupert, being called racist doesn't automatically make the policy wrong. The Monkey watching closely just notices the Gorillas always decide which cultures get legislated and which get protected 😳. Fair enough ... but who actually gets to define "British"? 🤔

I’ve been called racist and islamophobic hundreds of times today for outlining Restore Britain’s policy on banning halal slaughter, the burqa, sharia law, cousin marriage and plenty more. I want to be really clear about our party’s official response. We do not give a shit.

@BernieSanders 600k jobs, $100 billion, and internally they told staff to avoid saying "automation" 😳!!!! The Gorilla already knew how this would land so he changed the language before Monkey even noticed. That's not just business, that's a calculated move. Say less....

Jeff Bezos, worth $234 billion, plans to replace 600,000 Amazon workers with robots. Now, he wants to spend $100 billion to fully automate not just his warehouses, but factories in the U.S & other countries. Oligarchs are waging all out war against workers. FIGHT BACK.

She literally called her own taxpayers "captives" 😳 once remote work unlocked the cage, the Gorillas fled and took the tax base with them. Now the same Governor who said "get out of town" in 2023 is flying to Palm Beach begging them back. The Monkey watching this knows .... when the big Gorillas leave, it's always the little one who gets squeezed.

Just two years after telling rich Republicans to jump on a bus and head to Florida, NY Gov Kathy Hochul begs rich taxpayers who are in Florida to come back to New York so they can pay more taxes. Hochul says she needs "high net worth" people to cut her checks to fund New York's social programs. "I need people who are high net worth to support the generous social programs that we wanna have in our state right now." "...Cut me the checks... The first step should be to go down to Palm Beach and see who you can bring back home, because our tax base has been eroded."

The Gorilla pays 1.1% in taxes, then uses that saved capital to buy the factories where the Monkey works and replace him with robots 🤔. The system isn't broken, it's working exactly as designed. Somebody explain why the jungle keeps shrinking for one and expanding for the other!!!!

Jeff Bezos, worth $234 billion, sailed on his $500 million yacht to his $55 million wedding in Italy to give his wife a $5 million ring because his tax rate is just 1.1%. Now he wants to spend $100 billion replacing workers in entire factories with robots. Tax the rich - NOW.

@AndrewYang Not gonna lie, the Gorilla owning the AI gets richer while the Monkey using it stays replaceable 😳. Productivity goes up, wages don't follow. That gap is where the Gorilla lives. The jungle is getting upgraded .... just not for everyone in it!!!

AI is going to make a lot of people feel poorer, not richer.

@LibertyLockPod A media Gorilla who lobbied for a war he'll never fight is living rent free in people's heads 😭. The Monkey is out here voting based on vibes while the same Gorilla keeps his Fox News check. That's wild 🤔 who's actually being deported here? 🫵

Whoever promises to deport Mark Levin will have my vote in 2028.