Your Nigerian Uncle

I wish to make a Google+ circle for my village online, but with only 1 computer at café, we are already all in circle.

#imisswhen people actually believed me.

@Digeratii BELIEVE ME, they're real ;)

@fpillet "Scammer" is such a mean word. I prefer Financial Opportunist. Let's talk about potential venture I have over a game of Mad Birds.

@dahmelolla You say "scam", I saw "opportunity for many riches".

@devtony @am2me Actually, I have potential few online ventures we can discuss, niece and nephew. PS - I'm not dead yet.

#whenblackpeoplegetpaid They send me wire transfer to collect their inheritance.

@shamusbaier What? That dreams and fortunes are just that easy?

@Monaghan21 Hmmm. 1) Name 2) Email 3) Their offer 4) Can they swim?

@yanma89 I upselled him on the hyenas because they also serve as document shredders and supply milk for the two daughters.

@Jawdz_Fstar Olarotimi is my apprentice. He shouldn't have been on my computer station and internet chatting.

@IBMangz @Myko_Ariyo @Uncle_Manny @Cokobar @IBMangz @Seanovski91 You're welcome. Come visit sometime!

@LegendaryDonnie I am still very much alive, nephew. Just this morning I outran the old cheetah that lurks outside my village.

Nieces & Nephews, I am returned to the Twitter after long stay in US of A to help @BarackObama with debt. He ended up buying 3 hyenas!

I an finding out that hanging clothes on goat's horns is not the best way to dry them. This explains the chewed holes in my jacket!

@banteringblonde @DanielleSmithTV I am so happy you both found this connection, nieces. In celebration, I'm sending inheritance to you both!

@chris_london There is a Chevron Texaco right outside my village. They have the best deals on novelty hats and beef jerky!

@dotnetcowboy I'm so sorry for the typos, Mr. Peterson! My fingers must have been greasy from my afternoon Hot Pocket snack. Many apologies!

@4ThaLuvOfRaeRae hmmm an email from the CENTRAL BANK of NIGERIA. // At least open the email. I'll throw in a CBN stress ball & lollipop...

@abosio We sell our business models worldwide in 3 lovely packages: Gold, Platinum and the $250,000,000,000.00 Executive Set. Interested?