Chet “Chetamine” Williams

@zachcozart2 Wait until you discover no food Saturday

Hello friends. What’s your favorite New England prep lacrosse warmup mix? Let me know!

Apparently you're actually supposed to talk to your formal date if she invites you, why did nobody tell me this.

@VolsandBlowjobs @kennethclarkeiv There sure is pal.

Preparing to be the weirdest guys at the pi phi date party. Sophomore girls WATCH OUT

Woke up on the couch, scrolled for 5 minutes, DoorDashed, and established the bag order. Safe to say @Stimduncann and I are crushing Saturday

I can quit anytime I want! Just not right now

Bro Rufus was a movie #shrink

@fadule_ How do you even think of this

The plan: -start pregaming at 4PM -your friend’s older sister shows up with 5 hot friends -one of them is wearing a jean skirt and backless top and her body looks like she’s hit Pilates 5 times a week the past 6 years -she teaches everyone a dance routine as an ice-breaker -girls call her “extra” afterwards but all she did was unselfishly go out of her way to generate fun -your other friend shows up with dudes from his hometown - you could just be surface-level nice to them but you decide to boy them up harder than the chill Senior on your football team when you were a Sophomore -by the time you get to the bar you’re talking about sneaking out of your room to play Sly Cooper on school nights in 4th Grade and Maurice Clarett stripping Sean Taylor on his interception return in the 2003 Fiesta Bowl -you catch the baddie staring you like you’re Zac Efron in his prime (which is odd because she’s a certified 8 and you’re 6) -ten minutes later “When We Were Young” (2017) by Lost Kings comes on - you and the baddie find each other and start jamming to the dance she taught you - you’re absolutely crushing it which is uncharacteristic of you but you’re so high on life you’re not thinking you’re just being -you do this for 30 minutes like main characters in a show chicks would love then Irish exit together and smash in her immaculate condo (she’s a corporate lawyer) -you have a non-cringe cuddle session (no baby talk no hollow plans) then she politely kicks you out because she has “litigation” in the morning -you meet back up with your boy and his friends and order burritos and watch Dallas Buyers Club

@grantsnyder_ Nails

Pretty sexual head cover game I got this afternoon #sticks

@Nike Good ad

Priorities unchanged. Another major secured. The wins keep coming on and off the course for Scottie Scheffler

Duesday #expand

Please take all of my money

Who you think you am, I are

@captainjswiz Buddy ever heard of a sear? -Chet

Heard the left was trying to cancel a white (conservative) male summer… yeah that ain’t happening.

@JoeMarinaroLuvr PlayStation is for black people.

“No don’t move your PlayStation outside!” yelled the left. Watch this.

Gets home for the summer to see one of these open up. Southern burners are fuming. #yankee

Changing of the guard

“Yeah mom im gonna kill finals ive been in the library all day”

Mr Roberts running the ball #LANK