Houston SubGirl

Journey to Submission. Enjoy! Or not. I write things. houstonsubgirl.com

@Bull_Rush4570 Live feed of Bull:

I'm two hours in at a Mexican b-day party. Pray for my liver.

@RobSays__ Turk always drives but that’s only because I drive like a blind, drunk toddler behind the wheel of a dump truck that’s missing one wheel. It works for U/us. 😂

Girl-Woman wants Man-Child to Man Up and Be A Real Man. For her, of course. Bitch, I drive for 40 hours a week, you think you could drive us around on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon for a couple of hours? No? Fuck off.

Dear Idiots, Wrong. And more wrong. e.g. = Exempli Gratis i.e. = Id Est Just stop. —Someone who took 3 years of actual Latin and who auto-translates each time those abbreviations are used

If you get “misgendered” everywhere, maybe you aren’t trying hard enough. Up your woman-face cosplay game. #TranswomenAreMen

@DaygameCharisma Well iirc @Turk_Innocenti ‘s response to any version (blue hair, short hair, no hair, tats, body mods, etc) of this dumb shit test is “I’m gonna miss you.”

Got this from 2 out of my 3 regulars: "Summer is getting a bit too hot, I wanna cut my hair short, what do you think?" How would you handle?

@Mea_____Culpa Thank you! 😁

@SubHouston Happy Mother’s Day!!

Y’all left off the part where you and the besties drive blind drunk for an hour up 35N to get back to campus after tubing all day. “A beer” my a$$. 🤣🙈

@Turk_Innocenti Hahahaha yes, Daddy. They found a new one they love in Chinatown. Couple weekends ago, 16 shuttled all 6 of the BrainTrust there, 2 at a time. Never seen them all so happy. 🤣

I can think of a couple of kids who might could see this card in their future... #eatingThemselvesStupid

@TheRealLeejo Mine watched me walk to the mailbox several times, looking for an incoming check and complaining about our “lazy” mailman skipping our house that day. When I found a mystery stack of mail on the table the next day, “oh yeah, I put it on the table.” Why are they like this? 😂

me: get the mail I bet those chargers arrived my valedictorian son who is leaving home in a few months: ok! son: here’s the charger me: was there anything else? son: lots of stuff! magazines, envelopes…no packages me: did you think I’d ask you to put the other mail back? son: …

I grew up, sitting in Hoffheinz Pavillion with my father— close enough to see the sweat— watching Clyde the Glide, Akeem the Dream, and Phi Slama Jama… He would’ve *loved* watching tonight’s game. 🥹🥹🥹 WHOSE HOUSE??? COOGS HOUSE!!! #NCAAChampionship #coogshouse

What in the wild wild world of sports is going on here? 🤣

Fun with Wrong Numbers Episode 78435532356

@TheRealLeejo lol algo showed me that one, too. Tricky issue, she is clearly aware of her body/sexual appeal and is actively advertising it… where’s the line for competency/consent relative to all her non-47c simps, I wonder

what soros agenda of disruption decided that i need to see large breasted down’s girls? get behind me, algorithm

@Bull_Rush4570 That’s fantastic. Love it

@SubHouston Years ago, I ran into my kindergarten teacher at a Spec's. I was walking around, dressed in my Marine Corps uniform, holding three bottles of booze.

But OF COURSE when I’m at Walmart *specifically* to buy booze, with a cart already full of it, I run into 16’s ultra-religious bestie, who saw but politely ignored my cart. 🤣🤣🤣

@HandyGingerGal I don’t think I’m even allowed to watch the video of someone else doing it 🤣

No question I am dying on the first try.

The Texas Declaration of Independence wasn't just words on paper. It was the birth certificate of a nation. Every time you see the Lone Star flag, you're looking at the symbol of the sovereign republic established on March 2, 1836.

It’s so weird that this completely benign and normal phenomenon that happens all the time everywhere has not happened anywhere near my house since @elonmusk and @DOGE started auditing the federal government. 🤔 Clear blue skies every day now.

@Sarabeth_MrsB @UnchartedFather Good guy = nice guy = future abuser Bullet dodged. For her.

@UnchartedFather He failed that shit test.

Hey @elonmusk @DOGE literally ALL of the fed dollars going to Houston need to be cut. It’s either: imaginary programs or 99% unnecessary. Maybe keep the one about fire trucks at airports, that’s all. The rest is grift. Thanks @DataRepublican datarepublican.com/award_search/?…