Skeletor 🧼🧽🫧

Hey guys; I had to get a new phone and it apparently lost all my old NGL messages 😞 But I have a new link, so we can start fresh!! ngl.link/themuppetpasto…

@JessicaTheGreen I have questions but I don’t want answers.

Every May 13th we gather at MJ's ATM Patio for cold beer and erotic bingo at 9 pm 🍻

Massie fans: you have to see the grift here. This is a bad move. I love his voting record so don’t mistake it for hate. But Boller is an obvious grifter.

@DjMirnum Teenage kids!!!!

Hey uh, @TheMuppetPastor you um, care to explain this?

@Joygilligan Awe that’s sweet!

@TheMuppetPastor @TheMuppetPastor I sent 2 soaps and a candle with my 16 yr old daughter to Northern Ireland! She said in her wee Irish accent: “I wont want to use it, its so pretty and smells incredible, wont want it to end. We're just out for ice cream and guessing all the US states 😅 xo”

Many people who have not read the Bible are fond of telling others that it’s a book teaching us to love one another. Mind you, it DOES tell us that. But it spends countless pages showing us how much we humans fail at doing so, even killing the prophets God sent to warn us. It tells us God Himself came in human form, lived a perfect life, and we killed Him anyway. If anything, the Bible teaches us how much we hate the truth, how greatly we prefer sin over goodness, and how willingly we walk away. And despite all of this, for reasons we can’t comprehend, God STILL chooses to love us and give us numerous chances to repent. God gave us a way out of sin. God modeled behaviors we need to follow. And God proved that without Him, we can’t be good. We can’t love one another like Christ did if we aren’t following Christ. If anything, the Bible teaches us that God had every reason to give up on humanity, yet He has chosen to redeem us anyway, despite our imperfections. Love is looking at a broken, wicked populace, and still seeing good in them. And when we understand just how undeserving we humans are, we can learn to love a God who submitted to torture and death on a cross simply because He loved us more than we could love Him in return. “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:23 ESV All means you, me, and everyone else, even those yet to be born. I don’t know why God puts up with humanity, and yet He does, wanting all of us to be redeemed and giving us innumerable chances. So yes, the Bible teaches us to love, yet it also teaches us how unloveable we are and how much we fail to love. How we can ONLY love in Jesus, for without Him, we fail. We don’t know why Jesus gave us a second chance, nor will we ever discern why this side of heaven. All we can do is demonstrate our thankfulness and live accordingly.

This is horrible. I wasn’t going to watch anyway, but nobody should be dating this woman. She should be in prison.

@Protestia Someone get that singer out of the woke church and into a real one so she can marry a Christian Chad and have beautiful babies. Such a waste of a lovely girl.

At one of Canada's most progressive churches, an woman does a rendition of Coldplay’s “Fix You”… reimagined as “Heal You”

@defshepard @TMZ 🤣😇

@TheMuppetPastor @TMZ 🤣🤣🤣😇😇😉😉🫡🫡🫡🫡

🚨 EXCLUSIVE: Chuck Norris has been hospitalized after a medical emergency in Hawaii. What we know: tmz.me/7e8iqBd

@BasedZillenial Can’t help but notice they all have faces. #facism

I personally prefer 2-5, but there should be an option for 5.5, because the jump between 5 and 6 is actually kinda crazy. 😂 But if you’re fine, you’re fine and 1-5 is sublime. 🤷🏽‍♀️

@electrofier @TMZ @defshepard Me too

@TheMuppetPastor @TMZ @defshepard Lol. On a serious note, I hope he recovers.

@allie__voss There is such a thing as a man who’s brilliant, emotionally intelligent, sweet, and sexy because of it.

The sooner you realize that women’s desires go way beyond what the internet describes as an “alpha Chad male” the sooner you will understand women Until then you’ll make weird posts like this about happy married couples

@BasedZillenial The only right answer is Gimli.

@TheBabylonBee TO HELL WITH THE DEVIL!!!!!!!’

Stryper To Perform At Great Wedding Feast Of The Lamb buff.ly/qQIDISi

@allie__voss It’s almost like a woman who refuses to take responsibility for her actions might also have an affair with her boss.

I swear this woman doesn’t know when to quit

I don’t think they’re mutually exclusive. A God that can set up a system where land, plants, people, and animals evolve into exactly what He wants them to do is mighty and powerful indeed. We humans are like toddlers wondering where babies come from. We have some who believe the stork theory, some the cabbage patch, and we argue fiercely over them while God knows the truth and smiles like a doting father.

@DrDemosthenes @TheMuppetPastor Evolution is an highly evidence and understood scientific theory. It's why I believe it over the bible. And I used to be a christian.

I got geology books for my oldest and they talked about a 4.5 billion year old earth with fossils and geological eras. And she asked “But God created the world in seven days?” I sat down with her and said “Yes, he did. Whether that’s seven days that we know or seven days to God, He did.” And then I said “Look at the order of fossils you see. What animal comes first?” “They think Bacteria.” “Right. Before we even needed light, and after. What’s next?” “Plants.” Day 3 after he made heavens and earth. And next came the sun day four. Next. “A lot of clams and fish.” “Fifth day. Also remember dinosaurs are related to birds, and birds are day five.” “Wow I see dinosaurs and birds now!!” What’s next? “Day 6, animals.” “And what’s next after dinosaurs?” “Mammals!!” Day 6!! “Now what comes last?!” “People!!!” “End of day six.” “Wow, so the geologists are saying that life was created the exact same order God said?” “Yes. Did God lie to us?” “No way!! It’s the same order!” “So if it’s a human week, great. If it’s a week to God, who is outside of time and space, also great. Where some people look and see the Bible disproven, I look and see the creation order of Genesis one. And that is the takeaway. God made the universe and science agrees with the build order!” I respect young earth creationists and old earth creationists. Whether God intimately crafted every atom, or if He designed a universe where nature itself would do that for Him, He is still almighty and loving. God doesn’t need to meet my 2026 scientific standards for me to believe. I have seen the Grand Canyon and Mammoth Caves. God not only exists, He chooses to love even me. And the Bible isn’t “disproven” nor is it “errant” if earth is 4.5 billion years old. God designed the universe no matter what and expecting human authors born 4000 years before then scientific method to satisfy my modern curiosity is the height of arrogance. The Bible was written for us, but not TO us. We should endeavor to understand the culture it can from. Our pride demands it to fit our preconceived notions, but that is folly and sin. We are to understand the bible, not force it to become something it isn’t. God took us exactly what He wanted us to hear and know at a level He wishes us to understand. It’s like speaking to children, which we are. He made clear to Job that He doesn’t owe us an explanation of exactly how he designed the universe! Rather we are to trust and obey Him no matter what. And none of that somehow makes the Bible errant. No, it is exactly what God meant to say to humanity. Sure, it fascinates me that dinosaurs are now considered close relatives of birds, and that they were created before most mammals and humans, which explains day 5 and 6. But knowing that isn’t what made me want to love and obey God, either. Christians shouldn’t live in “fear” that science will disprove God. Remember, God created science, and the universe it studies. He will be just fine. He is just as real now as He was at the dawn of time, and nothing will ever disprove Him. Our pride does that, and you know what they say about that particular sin.

@DerekSmythe7 @LazyPhilosophia @McBrideLawNYC I am a doctor of evil, actually!!!

@LazyPhilosophia @McBrideLawNYC @TheMuppetPastor Dude, Skeletor doesn't even have a degree.

Catholic Carrie Prejean Boller is a Catholic who is Catholic. Did you know this Catholic was Catholic? Catholic Prejean is so Catholic she doesn’t tell any Catholic she’s Catholic. It’s been ten minutes that she’s been Catholic. And not Catholic, but Catholic Catholic.

@LutheranNovice Orthodox

@TheMuppetPastor Wait, so she is a Catholic?

@Happywife151 And to her credit, she did this in her prime. She could be making a ton of money in the music industry selling her body and souls right now.

She looks beautiful too.

@Friars75 @megbasham @staleyexpress He seems saintly in comparison, but I hear you.

@TheMuppetPastor @megbasham @staleyexpress Wait til they hear about Martin Luther king

I have no problem believing that Cesar Chavez was a sexual abuser. I have a very hard time believing that the legacy media just discovered this.