Saluzar Stephenson

@MurrayHillGuy1 Did you feel powerful typing this out?

Was at a bar this weekend and the line was insane. Bouncer goes: “Ladies are free, guys are $200.” Group of 8 hot girls pull up with one INSANELY gay dude. Bouncer stands his ground: “Ladies are good. He still has to pay.” Dude’s voice immediately jumps 4 octaves: “ARE YOU SERIOUSSSSS? YOU ARE SO HOMOPHOBIC” Whole group left. Never respected a bouncer more.

@JeffPassan What?

"One dry hump is OK. Two dry humps does not feel very good. I have been dry humped three times once. I felt like I couldn't move my arm for about eight hours." Pete Fairbanks on what it's like to for relief pitchers to get dry humped.

@fanofstu @mikenbacba He could theoretically. But who are you trading? It’s not a very useful tool to push a team into contention because it hard caps you at the first apron. The only sizable contract that would create significant room is trading DW. But why trade him just to use the TPE?

@The_Locksmith10 @mikenbacba I’m not the most well versed on NBA tax/trade rules but could Brad not just make a couple of trades in the off-season to get further under the apron before making a few separate TPE trades finishing off the roster with FA or buyouts later?

Boston at $188M with five trade exceptions totaling $45M is a war chest hiding in plain sight. The $27.7M TPE alone can absorb an All-Star caliber player without sending a single dollar back. Add the $8.2M and $4.7M exceptions and Boston can add three rotation players through trades using only exceptions. Tatum and Brown are locked in. White at $17M remains one of the best value contracts in the league. Pritchard off the bench at a fraction of what comparable scorers make. The roster has two gaps: center (Queta on a team option is a placeholder) and wing depth behind Tatum and Brown. The $27.7M TPE is perfectly sized to address the center position. Boston's front office has spent three years turning departing players into trade exceptions instead of dead money. That discipline is now paying off in the form of $45M in cap-free acquisition tools during a championship window.

@KodyParker10 @mikenbacba No, you can’t use the TPE on a transaction that would bring you over the 1st apron. If you use it any point you’re hard capped at the 1st apron threshold. If you’re $8M under the 1st apron, you can only use $8M of the TPE. If you were to try and use it for $12M, invalid

@The_Locksmith10 @mikenbacba pretty sure you can go into the aprons with the tpe. once in the apron you can't use them. so yes they should be able to use the larger TPE for one high caliber player

@mikenbacba 4. TPEs cannot be combined or “stacked” together. Each TPE must be used for one incoming player in each transaction. If they want to contend, they likely will go over the first apron. In which case they won’t be able to use these exceptions as you’re describing

@mikenbacba … They can’t just use a $27M TPE and acquire an all-star level player because that incoming player’s salary will assuredly put them over the 1st apron, making the transaction ineligible. 3.) They really have about $20M of the TPE to use, not $45M (2/x)

@MoggedByTatum @rathernot948 You have no clue what you’re talking about. If they use the MLE they’re hard capped at the first apron. How would they acquire Giannis in this case? They certainly do not have $20M in cap space

@rathernot948 Yeah but they’ll basically have the equivalent if not, more, because ability to use MLE’s, and the TPE they have.

White, Hauser, Pritchard match up to a max contract player. Jaylen Brown + Draft Capital matches up to another upper echelon max contract player. Celtics get Vooch off their book and add $20 million in cap space all while being under the luxury tax. 6 available 1st round picks to part with. If Bill Chisholm gives Brad the greenlight to spend, the sky is the limit for next years team. Not sure what you’re getting at Brett.

All are factors 1.) They weren’t as good as a 56-win typically is (for whatever reason) 2.) They had flaws in the roster construction that were exposed in a series against Embiid 3.) Shot generationally poor from 3 4.) Philly was better than a 7 seed 5.) No Tatum in G7

@AcademyOzuna Wake up pal. I’m trusting you

R7: 7 win 7,9 ex box

This is what Cora saw when Crochet got fuggin shelled. Bullpen game for the ages. #DINOSAURS

@BarryOnHere Yeah idk what your point is here, obviously Tatum had a bad series. It was mainly a group of factors though. RWIII was hurt and Looney dominated that matchup. As a team the C’s averaged around 15 TO’s a game. Stagnant offense which is the JT issue. Wiggins played all time D tho

@SOrangeJuice I just can’t sometimes man. Last year we publicly stated we would “weigh all options” when asked if we were hiring a GM (when it was the clear and obvious decision). Now we finally hire one…the day the portal opens? But when 2/3 best players are gone? Why not last week?

Now official, Nelson Hernandez is in place as Seton Hall GM, with portal set to open tomorrow.

@ScoutWithBryan No dude, you are not smarter than the internet as you’re making it seem. Hold the fucking ball and Boozer is at the FT line. Danny, Izzo, or Pitino’s teams would never make such a moronic mistake. But you’re almighty and know everything about hoops!

You literally know less about coaching basketball than your average 4th grade coach. Guys are WIDE OPEN down the court. All Boozer has to do is throw the ball 20 feet in the air and the game is over. But the fact you actually think players are following “instruction” or a “coaching decision” in this situation shows how completely clueless you are as to how the game of basketball actually works.

@MurrayHillGuy1 I’m as conservative as it gets but I’m also waiting in a line at terminal B of LGA that is estimated to be 3 hours. What you talking about pal?

Liberal media lies to you. Zero line at LGA at 5pm

In Ames, we don’t chase banners. We become the kind of team people remember long after they forget who won. But tonight, we fight. And fight we do. Because it feels like something. Can you smell it? Can you hear it? Can you taste it? It’s 1944. #OTZBALL #MOMMY

@CBKReport @ZachHodes @MattBrownEP So why have a picture of De Vries like that was his budget? Extremely misleading. We won’t know the number he worked with until next year

@KnowB70034 @ryansalfino He says “give him the resources” like they’re intentionally limiting what Sha has to work with🤣 It’s no secret they lack donor funding compared to top tier BE schools and this will continue until there is regulation on how much teams can spend on rosters

@KnowB70034 @ryansalfino He doesn’t understand what he’s talking about. They fully maximized their rev share amount (athletic department generates ~$8M in revenue a year) which allowed us to build a roster worth $3M-$4M this season. They will do so again next season. Baby steps

The university and athletic department need to politely but clearly step up right now. Extend Shaheen Holloway, give him the resources, and let him build this the right way. Coaches like this don’t come around often. He should retire a Pirate.

@RayOffenburger @off_one_tenth @ryansalfino Enlighten me, I’d love to know Ray. What are they spending this money on that supposedly exists?

@off_one_tenth @ryansalfino The resources exist. They are “choosing” to spend them on other things