The Michelle Slaughter

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The Michelle Slaughter

The Michelle Slaughter

@The_Michelle_S

A #poet in the streets An #author in the sheets #WIP at all times Look at me! I made a rhyme!! 🤷🏽‍♀️ ✝️🌿🍄👽🤯❤️ Insta @themichelleslaughter

Illinois, USA Katılım Mayıs 2011
3.8K Takip Edilen1.7K Takipçiler
The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Told my son this morning if I ever get in the music biz, my name will be Lil Onion because I'm a rapscallion. He was not impressed. What do kids know anyway?
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
@wiseconnector He said, "I love you." I said, "Thanks. I had a good night." And proceeded to get out of the car. He was dropping me home after our very first date. 🥴
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
There is no one else quite like you. No one. You are the one and only unique you. The fingerprint of your life will echo countless through the ages. And isn't that just f-cking amazing?!? 🥰
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Microwave instructions on the side of foods are so stupid. Like, listen up Taquitos, we both know I'm not going to eat only THREE of you so just tell me how long to heat 10 of you and stop trying to shame my life choices.
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
@SteaknShake Hadn't been to your place since pre-pandemic and was soooo excited to see you again. Walked in today and -pardon my language - but WTF. You've really let yourself go. What a shame. 😕
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Realized what I wanted in this relationship was a 4 course meal at a 3 Michelin star restaurant and all I got was an off brand expired box of mac n cheese. 😕
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
@DelbertThomas10 @USPS A letter from the state that I needed in January for documents I needed to provide and then everything after that was delayed because I never got the letter. It's all been sorted out since then but this sure would've saved a big ass headache.
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Got a letter in the mail Saturday from the state. Busy weekend so I put it to the side til now. Just realized the letter is dated January 5 and the envelope is postmarked January 6. @usps what the actual eff, bro.
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Forgot the word "ink" and so I just had to check the "printer juice" levels. 🤔 How's your day going? 😂
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haley 🐁
haley 🐁@halphelan·
@TiaMoeller Morbid! It was part two of their spooky castles episode, from Oct 2022. I was listening for research haha.
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David is querying 🤘
David is querying 🤘@rollins_green·
You've been kidnapped! Your rescuers are the characters from the last TV show you watched. Who's coming? It's not gonna go well. Maybe I'll be able to sneak out the back?
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
@GailSpeculates Thankfully I don't have to touch it. Just wanted to make sure I don't end up all itchy if I accidentally have contact.
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Gail Sproule 🇨🇦
Gail Sproule 🇨🇦@GailSpeculates·
@The_Michelle_S Virginia creepe. Some people, like me, are not good with it. I need to use gloves when I rip it off of things. It can choke out all sorts of good shrubs & trees and it is tenacious as hell.
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The Michelle Slaughter
The Michelle Slaughter@The_Michelle_S·
Can someone please tell me what this plant is? Google pics say it's not poison ivy, sumac or oak (and "leaves of 3, let them be" doesn't apply) but the mere suggestion is making me itchy 😭
The Michelle Slaughter tweet media
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