Official cicerone to King Charles III

@ClueHeywood @TheWapplehouse It's the code word for when you are overseas & think the Canadian you're talking to is an American with a maple leaf patch.

@TheWapplehouse what the hell is dijon ketchup

I am so fucking high and just had to listen to the lyrics to if I had a million dollars and I feel like I’m going insane

@ClueHeywood @atrupar How would he fucking know? He never went.

@atrupar "Vietnam took longer" is quite the flex

Trump: "Think of it -- we were in Vietnam for 19 years! I'm doing this for two, two and a half months."

@ClueHeywood @PFTCommenter Honestly, them flinging Skyline chill would be worse than feces.

@PFTCommenter Every gorilla has a no-trade clause covering the Cincinnati Zoo

FLEECED

@nuckfathalie I’m allergic to cocoa, so I both get the same treatment & feel the same way.

i’m allergic to shrimp so people always say this but i don’t feel like i’m missing out tbh.

An actor who played a character so perfectly that nobody else could ever top it. GIFS ONLY.

@thejudasicarus @proTWilliams

did you believe in Sinner & Saint?

@SoDuTw He didn't want to steal Danhausen's thunder?

Everyone's mind is going to the same place here.

@AJFrancis410 Ochocinco/Chad put it best when he said we wore that costume stuff for show but kept his real money invested. That's why guys like you & him get to have fun with their jobs now. wccbcharlotte.com/2020/10/15/cha…

I’ve owned an AP & I’ve owned a Rolex… I sold both within 6 months of purchase… Dumb ass uses of money, and if you think the Swatch AP somehow isn’t cool cuz more people can afford it, you’re an idiot. Your overly expensive watch won’t make your lame ass less lame.

@JustinMoris His escape pod worked.

Not everyone has been the commander of the Space Shuttle Challenger.

@ChrisParry @mgfleming12 We'd find out pretty quick who did buy them if the NDP brought in the scalping legislation.

@beerguyrob @mgfleming12 I honestly don't know a single local with a ticket

FIFA is selling a singular ticket to the final in New Jersey on July 19 for $32,970. This week, president Gianni Infantino said FIFA doesn't control high costs on its resale site. But this price comes straight from FIFA.

@ChrisParry @mgfleming12 “We’re helping our partners at Ticketmaster.”

@mgfleming12 "We dont control it, we just carve 30% out of it for ourselves."

@ChrisParry @Dallas_Brodie Yeah - like they'd admit her.

@Dallas_Brodie Nazi

By popular demand, reposting my attempts to read all the new school names:

@ChrisParry @JustinMoris

@beerguyrob @JustinMoris Again?

If you’re in line to complain about Pierre Dorion, STAY IN LINE

@melissacare01 Yay! More funding for my riding.

How to handle the 2026 census 🇨🇦

@ChrisParry @JustinMoris Aww man - we're getting the Eric Trump of GMs, aren't we?

@JustinMoris STOP THE COUNT

@ChrisParry @JenniferSey They’re too busy trying to hand the midterms over to the Republicans to figure that riddle out.

@JenniferSey You idiots can't decide if you should hate her for being rich or because she's criticizing the rich. Pick a lane.

This is the worst one at the Met Gala. Sarah Paulson’s dollar bill mask is some sort of protest against the 1% of which she is a part. If you want to protest the rich don’t go to an event that costs $100k per ticket. And give your $12m net worth away.

@timvofbodyslam This was a very sensible take. What is it doing on Twitter?!

Below are my thoughts on the reposts of WWE talent allegedly being asked to take 50% pay cuts. A thread : If the reports about TKO Group Holdings pushing WWE talent to take 50 percent pay cuts are true, it is hard to frame it as anything but a self-inflicted problem.

@MarksGonePublic It’s for Lapu Lapu, but I also choose to believe it’s for John Garrett

Why is this Canadian Flag at half mast? When I saw a kid we always knew why. It would be on the radio and talked about by all. Now no one knows & it’s value is at its lowest point. If I ask 100 people I bet no one would know. A quick search online nothing. Anyone know?

@nogamez_ @KamenRider808 @LDMenzies That’s what I was trying to say!

@KamenRider808 @LDMenzies people still are VERY bitter over that injury to E so any negative things that happen with the new day everyone will say stems from that injury and blame him

Don’t feel bad…

@Brendan_F_Wendt @HoratioCornblo3 @RAKEwBLAKE Witchcraft!

@HoratioCornblo3 @RAKEwBLAKE Also, the 2018 injury was from getting hit by a pitch that broke his arm; since it was ruled a hit by pitch by definition that means he was trying to avoid it, so how was that his fault?

Ever wonder why Judge just can’t stay healthy? Try swinging a 32oz bat, 75mph, at +90s heaters without decelerating the barrel around the body. Judges success is unquestioned. But just cause you can doesn’t mean you should. This patterning puts an extreme amounts of pressure on spine to decelerate the bat speed post impact. Once spine has had enough it outsources to “save” the spine. This makes him rely on quads, hamstrings, biceps, wrists, and obliques too often to get through the swing. Take a look at his injury history. Those aren’t “baseball” injuries for a SUPREMELY talented human. They are normal human injuries which speaks to the amount of pressure the swing places on the supporting muscle groups to sustain him throughout a season. Potentially why he hasn’t had much success in postseason. Body is hanging on rather than peaking. 🤷🏻‍♂️ x.com/yankees_fan_1/…