Elgar

@PizzaExpress I'm sitting in Pizza Express now & there's an error message instead of the page. Now what am I meant to do?

@MrDanielBuck @cactusncookies It’s why I quit. 18 years of steadily declining behaviour. Being hit over the head by a metal bottle was the last straw.

@cactusncookies I've watched colleagues quick for this exact reason

Hear me out: If a student calls their teacher a "f---ing b-tch," they don't need a hug, a bag of Takis, and some time to cool down in a bean bag chair They need to get marched out of the school

@BayesGaussusw @gem_ste 🤣🤣

@coldasice58 @gem_ste I'm not getting into that with one of you people again, I'm no fool

Was once on a train to Blackburn and a bunch of lads got on at Bolton. As we pulled into Blackburn the Bolton lads started going "BLAACKBUUURN! AHM IN BLAACKBUUURN!" really loudly taking the piss out the accent. Bolton is 14 miles away, less than 30 minutes on the train.

@BayesGaussusw @gem_ste No one from Bolton pronounces Bury as Bury, it’s always Berry.

@gem_ste My colleague from Bury, when I pronounced it Bury and not Berry: "who do you know from Bolton? Who got to you?"

@Richard66173180 @SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn We were moved immediately but it still wasn’t a great experience.

@coldasice58 @SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn Agree there has been some slippage in quality. I haven't had anything as bad as a blood splattered room.

Hotel rooms booked for 6 nights for work, normally I'd use @TravelodgeUK but after reading about them in the news this week, I'm going with @premierinn as I know they have a lone traveller policy. I'm sure I won't be the only one. #SafetyMatters

@ja_dazza @SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn Rust around the handwash is pretty standard.

@SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn This is a premier inn bathroom. That’s rust all around the hand wash & mould on there shower head.

@Richard66173180 @SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn We have also used them for years. The standard has definitely deteriorated over time. Some are very tired now & last year we were allocated a room with blood up the walls.

@SwailesRuth @TravelodgeUK @premierinn We've used Premier Inn for ages. Comfortable bed, good sleep, good breakfast, massive network of hotels all over the country, easy to book, good price. And now we know there is another reason as well.

@SwailesRuth @juliasuzanne76 @TravelodgeUK @premierinn So had we until we were allocated a room with blood up the wall.

@juliasuzanne76 @TravelodgeUK @premierinn I travel regularly for work. I’ve had good experiences with them too.

@Priggione That’s the only acceptable way.

Mate's just sent me this, she's making toast and this is how she cools it before buttering it 👀👀 wtf is that all about?? 🤔🫣👀🤣🤣

@CllrMickDuff @Mr_Husky1 No they wouldn’t, they could follow the pavement. Still inconsiderate parking though.

@Mr_Husky1 In note double yellows on the other side, leading to your driveway. Your local Council could be requested to install same on the other side. It’s dangerous the way he parked as pedestrians would have to step out on the road to get past him.

Is that weird to block my driveway like this? I just moved into my new house over the weekend and I came down this morning to find this random white car had parked right in front of my drive way (the grey Hyundai is mine). When the miserable old fart came to move it I popped out and politely asked him not to block my driveway but he was adamant that this is public property and anybody is allowed to park there. So I’m curious, do you think this was a strange place to park or am I being overly protective? He’s clearly not stopping me from being able to get out if I needed to, it just seems a bit rude to me

@richardosman It’s not too late to reconsider!

Thank you for all your kind words as I step down from #HouseOfGames after 9 amazing years. It is honestly the most fun show to work on, with the most wonderful team, but, after 800 episodes it's time to hand over the keys to a new host. There are plenty of new episodes still to air though, and I'll even be filming one final handover week later in the year! It really has been a treat from start to finish.

@BenJu92386989 @memecucker @PietaPotato “Garbage” isn’t English.

@memecucker @PietaPotato We don't want to show off our English language skills, it just really hurts our ears to hear foreigners trying to speak Dutch because it usually comes out as verbal garbage.

is there a language where the native speakers actively discourage you from learning it

@JaapdeJong19 @memecucker @PietaPotato How arrogant of you.

@memecucker @PietaPotato Foreigners trying to speak Dutch is slow and inefficient. And I really have to concentrate to understand them.

@HerbsandDirt @BurgerLab12 So he’s not a human but a dummy. You really are deranged. Or you could just try using punctuation.

@BurgerLab12 He’s an adult dummy.

That was easy: My youngest son: “Mom, should I get the tetanus vaccine?” (It’s for a new job.) Me: “ Absolutely not! It won’t just be tetanus anyway . It’ll be the DTaP. Tell them no thank you.” Son: “I thought so. Thank you!” Sometimes they need reminders. The answer is always no. 🚫

@HerbsandDirt @bob026 When you start with the personal insults you’ve lost the argument.

@bob026 Why do you look like you’re on an FBI watch list? Weird.

@GwynneKate @BlackM1710 @MariaBaird13 It sounds as if you are comfortably off. Not everyone is. There’s some perspective for you.

@BlackM1710 @MariaBaird13 Compassion for a parking ticket? If I had survived cancer surgery, that fine would be the least of my worries. When my husband had cancer, I couldn’t have given a fig about the fine. Just a different perspective, that’s all.

I recently had major surgery for cancer at Coventry hospital. My husband came to collect me, drove around for ages, finally managed to park. Paid the fee on departure. Just received a parking fine for £100. Apparently parked in the wrong place. 2 81 yr olds Any advice.

@GwynneKate @MariaBaird13 Maybe they can’t afford to pay it.

@MariaBaird13 To be honest, just let it go. You’ve just survived cancer surgery and you’re worried about a fine like that? Save yourself the stress and just pay it.

@SarahCholwill @MillarMillar7 Do you have a problem with other organs being transplanted or just this?

@MillarMillar7 Somebody else thought the headline was misleading. It’s accurate. It is a dead person’s womb! Transplanted into a living person’s body. Insane.

Feel good? Makes me feel sick. It’s not like having a major organ transplant like kidney or heart transplant to improve and continue life….I don’t know if it’s just me but I find this horrendous.

@JDCowboys2 @JezButt91 Oh, that’s ok then 🙄

@coldasice58 @JezButt91 Everyone involved in this situation is a victim and I’ve seen people on both sides being dehumanized all over Twitter

@JDCowboys2 @JezButt91 I think it’s fucked up to be dehumanised for having a neurological condition but there you go 🤷‍♀️

@JezButt91 I think it’s kinda fucked up to be dehumanized in front of thousands of people and millions of people watching around the world no matter how much money you have even if the guy couldn’t control it

@queenie4rmnola @GetMeOutOfKY Then answer an honest question - why is the word used all the time in rap music?

@GetMeOutOfKY If you can't stop yourself from calling Black people the n-word, you shouldn't be around Black people. Saying the n-word isn't equivalent to saying "cunt" or "bitch"

Calling Black men the n-word is racism. If John has coprolalia and can’t control the slurs he says, he should watch from a separate area, not in the main audience where Black people are exposed to slurs