Ally G🌵

I didn't know I was a Knicks fan.

I’m going to need a cardiologist after this Knicks game. Holy shit.

KNICKS KNICKS KNICKS!!!! LFG!!!!

When I’m eating shared nachos I’m always thinking 3 nacho moves ahead of my opponent.

and for the lady, perhaps a deep cleaned house, cancelled plans, a new series to watch, and zero human interaction?

‘adhd is a superpower’ don’t piss me off i drank 4 shots of espresso then fell back asleep and slept through my alarm

Hey man, do you mind if we push this call til next week? I’m thinking one or both of us might die in the upcoming nuclear holocaust, which would pretty much solve this whole problem for us

bro why am i crying at a rocket launch

give me a tote bag so ridiculously large that when i’m looking for something and say “one second,” i climb inside it and you just hear echoes and stairs like it’s an apartment building in there.

@ashhhk25 Yes and we haven’t changed anything in our home. We were floored when we opened the bill yesterday.

Okay is it just me or has anyone else’s Xcel Energy bill like tripled over the last few months??!!

@RodKahx She’s just going to regular hell 🔥

There is a special place in Twitter hell for Olivia.

@oliviakrolczyk_ Surprise, a catholic who is just a mean girl 🙄

i think sitting on the front porch while watching a severe thunderstorm will cure me

@GlowSurfing I just renew mine online every year and they mail our tabs. It’s still expensive though and the roads near me are always in terrible condition.

I’ve been at the DMV for over an hour just to pay over $800 for a three year-old vehicle! MN sucks!

Remember, if you’re losing an argument, just yell really loudly about the stock market.

I didn’t realize until I became a parent, but the worst part of being a mother is other moms.

@OutofGalaxyy Wow, I didn’t know it was a widespread issue until I saw this tweet. I thought my phone was breaking and have had to use my iPad as my alarm.

Apple must seriously address this issue. This has happened to me and many others. It’s EXTREMELY annoying 😭

When you accidentally become important at work

Aliens (completely bewildered): so the groundhog Me: is clairvoyant, yes