DM Punk

Best night ever! #blink182 #ONEMORETIME #london

@cinbiote I'm just laughing at all these messages of people being offended on the behalf of wrestlers who have no problem with it 😂 what happened to society

transcript/description of the show since they’ve already started taking down videos of the WWE Wrestlemania Roast. disgusting

@DreamClothingHQ Pleaseeee I'd love one! 😎

@AmorimEra_ We paid £60m for an injury prone Mason Mount and £75m for Rasmus Hoijlund- you're deluded if you think Garnacho isn't worth £90m+

£60M for Garnacho is an unbelievable offer and we can’t even lie to ourselves lol.

@DanMarsala @JBonathan @StoryoftheYear Please please could you guys play Take Me Back in London (Brixton) 🙏🙏 It's my bucket list song and my favourite of all time. I will be forever grateful to you guys pleaseeee 🙏🙏

@Molson_Hart Did you eat a McDonald's quarter pounder?

I’ve been peeing blood for four days because I got a bidet. Monday night : I feel sick. Everyone in my family has a cold. NBD. Tuesday: man, why do I get so sick when everyone else is fine? Man flu, I guess. Wednesday: oh shit I am really sick. Why am I not getting better? Wednesday night: it burns…when I pee? Thursday: cannot get fever down. Now I’m doubled over in pain after peeing. Wife convinces me to go to doctor (gentlemen, marry a good woman!). Doctor (physician assistant actually and it was the 3rd place we drove to because 🇺🇸) has me do a pee test. There’s blood in your urine. You have a UTI. Ah now I see why I wasn’t getting better from the cold! It was the UTI all along! Get antibiotics and start taking them. There’s an unlikely chance that the uti is resistant to that antibiotic. We’ll find out later. Friday: feeling worse but am taking way more symptomatic relief so I’m functional. Take a shower, pee in my hand looking for blood to measure progress. Ohhhh that really hurts. Is that a booger? Oh no it’s coagulated blood. Oh shit. Go to the ER. Do another pee sample. Proudly produce a cup of urine, with blood and blood clots/coagulated blood for testing. They tell me the clots are probably just the infection not something worse because my kidneys don’t hurt. Young female doctor checks my penis. Says the word “excellent” while my wife is in the room. This gives me the strength to fight on. They prescribe backup antibiotics in case my uti is resistant to what I’m on but it’s unlikely. Go home. Today: feel better actually but still moaning hard every time I pee and peeing lots of blood! Get a call from Thursday’s PA. You have E. coli that is resistant to the antibiotics you’re on. Oh shit that explains why I ended up at ER. Infection was not being affected by drugs. How the fuck did I get E. coli? When you use a bidet it shoots water at your butthole and E. coli is in healthy people. Well I shot water into my butt which then ended up getting shot into my penis. That’s the best explanation I can come up with! Lessons: 1. Physicians assistants can be pretty good actually! The one I saw figured out root cause and addressed possibility resistance. 2. Teaching hospitals seem to give the best care. If you’re not sure which hospital to go to near you, pick the one attached to the good university. 3. Antibiotic resistance is real! Make sure you pick the right drug and finish the course, not just for you, but for whoever gets that bacterium next. 4. Marry someone who cares about you. Man…my wife has been juggling 2 kids plus me. I am extremely grateful. That said, having her drive me to the doctor was perhaps the scariest part of this experience. Also in-laws. My wife spent 4-5 hours with me in ER. Without in laws do we have our kids with us? It takes a village. 5. Bidet poop water can get in your pee hole at the right angle and this can give you a uti. Thats what I think I learned…but unfortunately this isn’t done. Im still peeing blood. Thanks to everyone who wished me well when I posted I was in an ER (0 people). Hopefully round 2 antibiotics work 🙏

@UtdDistrict @MailSport @ManUtd The issues with the mentality of the players we have. "Oh he was amazing in training and one of the best". It means absolutely nothing. Unless you can translate that onto the pitch through hard work, dedication and passion and into trophies, it's a waste of talent. Same for all 3

🎙️ | Paul Pogba on Ravel Morrison: "Let me tell you, Ravel is the best player of my generation that I have seen. No doubt. I saw stuff Neymar was doing at Santos - Ravel was doing that." [@MailSport]

@Nat_Upton Congrats!! Are you able to share your code please if you're done with it by DM? 🥹

@DBhailis @wiretaup Huge pop! What a reference 😭

Def Rebel's been hard at work for Bret's return

@richardajkeys In case anyone doesn't know- 'booked' is wrestling terminology for how a wrestler is portrayed on TV. So maybe Richard is just a huge wrestling fan 😂

What don’t you understand? He was correctly booked. It’s simple. He let himself and his team down. 🤷‍♂️

Few big deals set to be done before the end of the window. Need a catchphrase… Hit me with your best ones! (I’m dreading this)

@McDonaldsUK I'm so disappointed and disgusted right now- why are there egg shells in my McMuffin?? Really put me off McDonalds if the standards are falling this low

Embrace your ‘cheesy side’ and share one of our gooey messages with a loved one this Valentine’s Day

@views09 For every beautiful woman, there's a man, who's tired of her shit

@YaOnlyLivvOnce @DomMysterio35 Dom's wife is the most supportive wife in this planet

Always my hero… my Daddy Dom @DomMysterio35 😍❤️‍🔥

@TheTBiggz79 @MalcolmMuscle Hell Yeah!!! That was the I quit match right?? Absolute classic

@MalcolmMuscle Favorite Cena match is Him vs JBL at Judgement Day Least is Him vs Bobby Lashley Great American Bash it’s the match that turned me against Cena for the longest time

What's your favorite John Cena match?

@adamReames @SavinThePeeps @OTD_in_WWE It's a retractable roof

@SavinThePeeps @OTD_in_WWE No it doesn’t 😂

WrestleMania at Wembley Stadium ☔

@MohammedAston07 @UtdPlug @lauriewhitwell I thought it was Eric Steele??

@UtdPlug @lauriewhitwell This was the guy that was coaching Van Der Sar when United won the champions league and Premier league in 2008

🚨 Richard Hartis, who has been United's goalkeeping coach since 2019, is to leave the club. @lauriewhitwell

@UtdFaithfuls Are McLaren and VD Gaag still there?

🔥 YES, THIS IS IT. Man Utd FINALLY have a proper football structure.

@WrestleOps Can someone explain Joe Hendry to me please? I've been out of the loop so want to get on to the hype. Like what is his character/deal? First impressions are Ken Doll/annoying advertising guy. Maybe even a bit of Homelander

Joe Hendry’s arrival in WWE now ranks as the 3rd highest viewed tweet on WWE’s official Twitter in 2024 (9.3M). The only tweets ahead being the RAW to Netflix announcement (14M) and The Undertaker’s surprise appearance at WrestleMania XL (11M).

@WrestleOps Can someone explain Joe Hendry to me please? I've been out of the loop so want to get on to the hype. Like what is his character/deal? First impressions are Ken Doll/annoying advertising guy. Maybe even a bit of Homelander

Joe Hendry’s arrival in WWE this week is now WWE’s most liked video on their official Twitter, post-WrestleMania XL season. 89K Likes | 7+ Million Views. Surpassing Uncle Howdy’s arrival this week.

If you're right-brained, you'll see a chicken laying an egg. If you're left-brained, you'll see a man riding a horse.