dashrealtor | Zetarium

Just met a cute girl at the wedding i'm at. like actually cute. genuinely attractive human being. we're talking. vibes are good. she's laughing at my jokes. i'm being charming. then crypto gets brought up, she says it "i use solana" my ears PERKED up i played it cool. i said "oh nice, what protocols are you on" she said "i have some SOL on Kraken" and that's where a normal person would have said "wow that's really cool" and gotten her number but i am not a normal person my brain immediately went into autopilot and i said "on Kraken? do you at least self-custody?" she looked confused i kept going "do you have a wallet? do you stake? what's your DeFi allocation. are you actually onchain or are you just sitting on a CEX watching candles" she said "i bought SOL and i check the price sometimes" and i said "so you don't actually use solana" the vibe was GONE her friend pulled her away. she didn't look back. i was standing there alone at a wedding holding a drink i wasn't even sipping doing MENTAL MATH on whether someone who's never left a CEX can even call themselves a solana user my friend walked over and said "bro she was into you what happened" i said "she holds SOL on a CEX" he said "so?" SO??? i would rather DIE alone than let a CEX-only price-checker who's never opened Phantom think we're in the same ecosystem she had a pretty face but a DISGUSTING onchain history because there IS no onchain history and i simply cannot overlook that could've had her number but she knows i'm running DeFi positions across Drift and Kamino at 3am while she's asleep and honestly that's worth more solana