Diana

@RealKenBruce @markgoodier @greatesthitsuk Congratulations and very much deserved.

Thanks so much for all the lovely messages about my MBE. I’m very grateful and I promise it won’t change me! I am still off on holiday for a further week so please keep listening to @markgoodier on @greatesthitsuk every morning.

@neale_morrison He's #rood

Pals him moved again and me tooked his place on de sofa now. How come he’s calling me de feefing rittle plick?!?!?

@Iggy86250842 It is a bit.🤣🤣🤣

Someone thinks this is funny.... #BTPosse

Did Sean Connery enjoy eating all herbs? No. Only partially. #sidesplittingsunday

First thing this morning, there was a tap on my front door. My plumber has an odd sense of humour. #sidesplittingsunday

@runalongwomble Just started The Mother by @TMLoganAuthor . Got that tingle of a great read coming up and can't wait to see what happens next.

I've written a song about a tortilla. Actually, it's not so much a song as a wrap. #sidesplittingsunday

@FintanTheWrong 249

@brit_battleaxe Easy to grow from seed on the kitchen windowsill too. The scent is said to deter flies and I think it worked, definitely used less fly spray this year.

Supermarket basil flops or dies? It’s designed not to last - too tightly planted - so you have to buy more! Divide it up & pot into 3 or 4 - that way it’ll last much longer - should see you through Christmas & into 2024 if you’re lucky. #YumYum

@PenguinUKBooks Blood Rites by Rachel Lynch. One in a series of excellent police procedurals set in the Lake District. Enjoyably readable.

QOTD: What are you reading this weekend?? 📚✨

@BrokenByWar Panic.

@minimooey I think you're right.

@didibs39 I'm sure its to make us all go away

BRING BACK TELEPHONISTS TO ANSWER THE PHONES AND PUT PEOPLE THROUGH TO THE RIGHT FUCKING DEPARTMENT, ALL THIS FUCKING ABOUT PUSHING NUMBERS PISSES PEOPLE OFF. When I was at work we use to have to answer by the 3rd ring. BRING IT BACK

@essexjackbt Happy Gotcha Day Wilbur.

It’s my 2nd gotcha day! I’m sure my Hoomans are finking thank goodness I came into their lives😂 Love Wilbs xxx🐾

@RobTemple101 There's never any need to muck about with cheese.

Wensleydale with cranberries is the worst cheese. Horrible stuff.

Ken Dodd was going to form a new supergroup with Jon Bon Jovi. They were going to call it By Jovi. #badjokeFriday

@SoVeryBritish Fetch a cloth Granville.

What’s a random quote from British comedy that you can’t help but say every now and then? Mine is: “God, I'm bored. Might as well be listening to Genesis” (Rick, The Young Ones)

According to the latest study there are 10,000,000 overweight people in the country and 5,000,000 extremely overweight people. Obviously though, those are just round figures. #badjokeFriday

Dave bought a 50-year-old box of After Eights on eBay for £500. They were worth so much because they were still in mint condition. #badjokeFriday

@Stevie5667 Dunno why they all get so obsessed with hairs. Hair sheds and apart from food prep areas, so what. One thing that makes me laugh is denial of dust even when it's there for everyone to see on film.

I hope Maxine comes last ! What an arrogant lady! #fourinabed