Water Malone

@MattsBestTweets I am ready for competitive grilling let me know

made a new friend at porchfest pregame/walking around. he told me he's hosting a "straight guys vs lesbians" grill off and asked if i wanted to participate and/or judge. marked that day in my calendar immediately.

@rome_nolimits Tim Settle never should have left

#Commanders 2026 Free Agency Moves so far: • Odafe Oweh — 4 yrs / $100M ($25M per year) • Leo Chenal — 3 yrs / $24.75M ($8.25M per year) • Tim Settle — 3 yrs / $24M ($8M per year) • Amik Robertson — 2 yrs / $16M ($8M per year) • Nick Cross — 2 yrs / $14M ($7M per year) • K’Lavon Chaisson — 1 yr / $12M • Chig Okonkwo — 3 yrs (Up to $30M) Adam Peters COOKING 🔥 #RaiseHail

@grantpaulsen Had to take my socks off my feet were sweating so much

I made it about five minutes watching Alex Honnold climb the sky scraper. I’m literally leaning back in my couch, stomach in knots. Couldn’t do it.

@grantpaulsen You're close

The correct order of deliciousness of starburst flavors: Red, pink, yellow, orange.

@ChuckFBass Geno smith is mismanagement

36.42 total points No injuries No bye weeks No mismanaging Just pure, unadulterated ass

@LaboratoryMan6 You're almost there

Have you noticed that John Fetterman, the senator with brain damage, is the most intelligent Democrat in Congress? That says all you need to know about the idiots running the Democratic Party. Sen. Fetterman should be the Dems majority leader.

Cam Newton looking like hes got dinosaur hunting in the morning and the Mad Hatter's tea party at noon and trying to thread the needle there

@MattsBestTweets That's what happens when you grill without me

My friend made thirty burger patties for everyone and burned them all. Really funny bit

@MattsBestTweets He sucks at swinging a broad sword and then he files it down into a scimitar and becomes a badass

@dmvdenizen my favorite part is when antonio banderas learns how to speak Danish or whatever in like a week just from listening to them

going to watch the thirteenth warrior tonight. classic movie about vikings and antonio banderas teaming up to kill cavemen.

@SleeperNFL Henderson, Hubbard, Conner in that order

Which RB are you targeting in this range?

@MattsBestTweets Don't forget to check up on Fishtown Phil

headed on up to philly. going to do all kinds of stuff this weekend. fun stuff. stuff you couldn't even imagine.

@FlamenDia1is @NoLieWithBTC No

@NoLieWithBTC And ? Is that factually accurate?

The Trump administration is now seeking to replace PBS with “Prager University,” a far-right propaganda organization that isn’t actually a university. One of their “kids videos” has Christopher Columbus telling them that slavery was “no big deal” and “better than being killed.”

@BStreetBurner The fact you got so many eagles fans in the comments believing this is actually hilarious

WHO ARE YOU THROWING TO JAYDEN DANIELS???? 😂😂😂😂

@Nationals One step further away from having an entire roster named Luis Garcia

We have acquired LHP Jake Eder and 1B Sam Brown from the Los Angeles Angels in exchange for LHP Andrew Chafin and RHP Luis García.

@caleb_blog I've been waiting for more goblin comic

share a piece of goblin comic lore about your self

@Nationals One step closer to having an entire roster of guys named Luis Garcia

We have made the following roster moves: - agreed to terms with RHP Luis García on a one-year Major League contract - recalled C Drew Millas from Triple-A Rochester - placed C Keibert Ruiz on the 7-day IL - optioned RHP Eduardo Salazar to Triple-A Rochester - transferred RHP Trevor Williams to the 60-day IL

@MattsBestTweets Drove 8 hours to the Adirondacks this weekend and sat around up there, pretty good time

Life is mostly about going to different locations so you can sit down

@AdamSchefter M mm mm mm m. N

Steelers’ Week 1 starting QBs since Ben Roethlisberger’s retirement: 🏈2022: Mitch Trubisky 🏈2023: Kenny Pickett 🏈2024: Justin Fields 🏈2025: Aaron Rodgers

@CodifyBaseball Bring the shift back

Tell me the one baseball rule you'd eliminate if you could.