Emily Lehman

We gotta get rid of the re-entry policy man. These crowds for the start of the 3rd quarter are embarrassing. If you can’t run out to your car to slug a beer and get back within 15 minutes just be an adult and start sneaking in a flask

KANSAS STATE WILDCATS SPECIAL TEAMS!!

I wonder if the Irish are watching this game thinking that the team with the most fumbles wins

I swear no FOOKIN Iowa State fan better even THINK about looking at me wrong or else I’m gonna- *ISU fan bumps into me* “Ope sorry about that” “No worries bud have a good one” As I was saying I’ll absolutely BATTER the next clone I see I swear on me mum!!

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Has anyone tried turning the offense off and then back on?

“Pro-life” would be 20 Sandy Hook students voting for the first time this election.

"you let your cat sleep in your bed!?" brother i would let my cat shoot a gun if he wanted to

My sun and my moon already align perfectly thanks

They need to reboot “four weddings.” I wanna see some real haters in action.

I will never understand how my air pods have different battery levels when I have never once worn less than both of them at a time

the level of delusion needed to get the most specific category in nyt connections is actually driving me insane

country music by men: I love my tractor and beer and my pretty little lady country music by women: I am about to commit A Crime and it’s probably Murdering My Husband

Imagine having to explain to your great great great grandparents what a meme is

Going to need press box Willie tonight

Weather channel: try to delay your travel until the snow stops K-State fans:

A few reminders as we head into Thanksgiving: -Don't comment on someone's body, even if it looks different than the last time you saw it. -Don't comment on someone's food choices. Those are inside thoughts. -Don't assign moral value to food. You don't need to "earn" pie.