wesley

After minimal though I have decided that today will be a good day

dont do it buddy it’s a trap they’re gonna make you email

Today’s to do list: 1. Bite off more than I can chew 2. Build Rome in one day 3. Poke a bear with a stick 4. Beat a dead horse 5. Skate on thin ice

computa help me

fuck you

jimmy neutron was based on a real boy from my church

kids these days don’t have role models to look up to anymore, when i was growing up we had master chief and the bionicles to teach us right from wrong and what it means to be a man

Just paid $1800 in taxes to the fascist government like a good little boy

a beautiful woman named beep is trying to contact me through my carbon monoxide alarm

tony hawk's po tater

Bob Dylan should do super bowl

The rats could get me at any moment today

There’s rats in my walls and ceiling

(daft punk One More Time voice) Auld Lang Syne

found the grinch was laying face down in my yard this morning. thought the little guy had just tuckered himself out stealing christmas again but - no, he’s fully dead.

cw// grinch i just woke up. he took everything. even the who hash.

I’d like to see those three ghosts try me tonight

Reggae Scrooge: jah humbug!

homer of a lonely bart

obama drake: you used to call me on michelle phone

saying 6 7 to my grandkids and they start beating me to death with a new kind of hammer they invented called Hammer 2