Andrew Bevan

Homophobia is the man sitting next to me on the train blasting his music while I’m trying to listen to the new Beyonce album

*adds 'award winning vo artist specialising in blathering on about kitchens to sell microwaveable burgers to football fans' to linkedin*

For sale: very sexy thongs, never worn (hopefully)

On Christmas Day, I like to search 'unwanted gift' on Ebay and sort by newly listed. It's a real treat to see the shit that people can't wait to get rid of. ebay.co.uk/sch/i.html?_fr…

@mollyEatsTofu Same but Desperate Housewives

If you’re feeling low may I recommend rewatching all 7 seasons of the Good Wife

@fasc1nate @mollyEatsTofu just a guy, maxing, waxing, relaxing.

The South American giant monkey frog massages its skin to secrete a wax that stops it from drying in the sun. twitter.com/Debbie_banks30…

This is a tweet to let any production/media companies who follow me know that I can indeed be bribed. You, yes you, could help bring my latest crappy campaign to life for the low low price of a eurovision ticket.

Wow. Incredible.

@ErlingRoIe @mollyEatsTofu His name is henny

Cristiano Ronaldo since Ten Hag took over

when my friend says their jacket is reversible

omg

So I decided to watch the live cast recording of the little mermaid because why are you judging me tho. Would you just look at what’s in store

The gays upstairs are watching Grease. How do I befriend them

Heading for the biggest, most prolonged heatwave the country has ever seen and none of the candidates for Prime Minister can get the words ‘climate change’ out of their mouths as they’re too busy talking about how toilets should be labelled. Vote them out. #ClimateCrisis

Madame Tussaud's Blackpool lugging their waxwork Boris to outside the job centre is an absolutely sensational bit of stick

“And the winner of #DragRace UK Season 4 receives a position in the United Kingdom Government”

INCREDIBLE SCENES “THE BENNY HILL THEME TUNE” IS BEING BLASTED OUT ON SKY NEWS.

@LuckyGenerals @Charandholl l o l

The new creative team rocking into the office