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analogjam
19.2K posts
@benjamin_horne Lived there for 20 years. You’re doing it all wrong.
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NYC is no longer a city, it is an algorithm.
If you live in, say, Cincinnati, when you go to get ice cream with your friends, you really are just going to get ice cream with your friends.
In NYC, this is not possible. You cannot just go to get ice cream, because, against your will, you are very self-consciously “someone who lives in NYC, going to get ice cream with their friends, in NYC.”
You are never able to achieve full presence of mind because you are constantly placing yourself inside a chapter in some made up, schizophrenic and highly disorienting book.
Put another way, as a New Yorker, you do not live in a city, but a massive, procedurally generated simulation of one. You are nothing more than a vapid unit of flesh and bone trapped since a Baudrillardian infinity mirror, where the references have their own references.
You become more of a vague concept than a real person—some strange, soulless mix of ambition and violent/sexual impulses—and in your constant confusion you fail to ever become a true subject.
You pay $17 for the ice cream cone. Then, you pull out your list of saved Instagram Reels which tell you where to get reservations for pasta later.
When you arrive, you find yourself stuck in yet another long line, with people who look just like you.
The longer you wait in lines like these, the harder it becomes to ever recover the soul of the person you were before you moved into your East Village studio.
Connor Paton@connorpaton
nyc has a froyo epidemic line is pure insanity
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*cracks knuckles*
*drags soapbox to center stage*
*gingerly climbs atop soapbox*
*clears throat aggressively*
Nolan Ryan exists
Mike Petriello@mike_petriello
Wrote about Jacob Misiorowski, who is the hardest-throwing starter in the hardest-throwing year, and so .. we can confidently say that he is the hardest-throwing starting pitcher who ever lived. He faces the Cubs tonight. --> mlb.com/brewers/news/j…
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Fill in the blank:
"Hall of _____"
If you said "fame," then perhaps considering fan-voted All-Star Games is actually relevant. There aren't many more famous catchers that Salvador Perez in the game.
Sin City Roto@SinCityRoto
@notgaetti @BigLeagueDigest Using fan voted all star games to consider someone for the hall is insane
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@HeidiSmithEgan1 @Rob_Shenanigans Super Bowl is much much larger event.
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@Rob_Shenanigans So we hosted a Republican national convention for President but are too small for Super Bowl?
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POINT BEING... There is 0% chance Cleveland builds 60,000 hotel rooms. Goodell also recently said Cleveland has "roughly half" the amount of rooms needed to host a Super Bowl. 42,000 rooms @ 100 per hotel average = 420 hotels. That's not happening either. This means... (1/2)
Roberto Shenanigans@Rob_Shenanigans
Nashville is increasing their number of hotel rooms to 80,000 to accommodate a Super Bowl. The entire greater Cleveland metro area only has 21,000 rooms. Roger Goodell recently said Cleveland does not have the hotel capacity to host a Super Bowl. Better get building, Cleveland.
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@Fred_Butler I’m not a tough dude, but I’m confident I could take all eight of them at once.
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The "Hush woman! The Men are Talking!"conference.
Troy Frasier AKA Revived Studios@RevivedThoughts
People are making fun of this conference. But I don't get why you wouldn't want to go to a Christ is King conference about America after Trump 2 years before Trump leaves office. The "new Christian right" seems to be aiming for less Christians and less right. Oh and it's $250
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analogjam retweetledi
Hall of Fame Re-Vote
You hold the deciding vote in the Hall of Fame case for Jim Rice. Does he get in?
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Webbon, Partridge, Sears and Haymes all have children. Lying Jew.
Eyal Yakoby@EYakoby
The definition of conservative: 8 guys, zero of whom have children. 7 of which don’t have a wife. 8 of which sit in their basements complaining for a living. 8 of which never fought in the military. lol.
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R.A. Dickey won the 2012 Cy Young Award. Was it the right decision?
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Chud's bail is $1,250,000 for shooting a black man who attacked him.
The black man is still alive.
Karmelo Anthony's bail was $250,000 for stabbing Austin Metcalf unprovoked.
Austin is dead and buried.
“Black Privilege” is one of the biggest problems in America.
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@RightWingCope @ayeejuju He’ll love the love he’s about to get.
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@ayeejuju No shit, Chud committed a crime while OUT ON BOND with a firearm. Obviously your bond is going to be higher if you catch an attempted murder with a firearm in public while already out on bond
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Man, and to think I was an Edwin Diaz fan. A new article tying Diaz to an illegal cockfighting ring in Puerto Rico makes you wonder if MLB will address it or if it'll simply get brushed under the rug like Ohtani's gambling escapades. This is crazy.
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happy friday
if i have to hear the take my whiskey neat song one more time i will off myself there will be no more geeta
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