Jaybird

@zahrantica Sous vide for poor folks

I'm calling the police...

@TheStingisBack Dudley Moore would have made a good Bilbo Baggins

The moose head scene in Arthur took 27 takes because Dudley Moore kept cracking everyone up with relentless ad-libs. Burt Johnson got genuinely angry; his “Why don’t you forget the moose for a moment!” was unscripted, and Moore’s stunned reaction is 100% real Happy birthday, Dud.

@Jonas_Ceika 😂😂😂

I sent ChatGPT an audio file of a series of FART sound effects and asked what it thinks of "my music" and this is what it said

@Mappy6984 Joey and The Deaf Fatones

Time to hang it up

@Jacobtheclipper Nothing but net

Bronny from the logo 🔥🔥🔥

@FBGreatMoments I wonder how much money you could get if you sold his booger smear on eBay

Roger Goodell wiping his booger on a handicapped girl smh 😭

@AndrewGold_ok So heated 🙄

Heated race debate leaves Eni Aluko speechless!

Hyphenated. Non-hyphenated. The irony.

@barstoolsports Natty and the high knees is my new ska band name

WE GOT HIGH KNEES IN THE NATTY!

@EndWokeness And that’s a bad thing?

Joy Reid's warning about the far-right: "Their plan? 0 income tax, 0 regulation, earn as much as you want, your family inherits it all!"

@WrestlingMark16 Stupid

Fixed it for you 👊

@ChrisMurphyCT You should subpoena them and do a hearing

The refs have taken control of this game. Fouls are 11 to 4? Ridiculous. Only reason Michigan is in this game.

@StephenKing Your next book should be a long walk off a short pier

In February, the average price of a gallon of regular gas in the United States was $2.91. Now it’s $4.22 . That's what you get when you elect an idiot the president of the United States, allow him to start a war without congressional approval.

@RickyDoggin A new Guinness record

@7Veritas4 😂

Famous Wartime quotes by US presidents: “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are." - Washington “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." - FDR "A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on." - Truman “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall” - Reagan “Open the fuckin’ Strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell - JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah” - the crazy one

@charise_lee Hilarious

bahahahhahahhahaha 😂

@mattvanswol Get a new timeline

I'm seeing thousands of Americans in my timeline on X today: a) rooting against America b) hoping Trump is dead c) rooting against THE RESCUE of an American pilot Where do we go from here?

@ErikUnchained So, who got gold?

A preview of what to expect at the Olympics in Los Angeles.

@LibOrNormal With no vocals it’s pretty good

Can we all agree that the song "Rock Lobster" from the B52's is the worst song ever?!?!

@KTrain939913 A great talent

Today in Rock History April 5, 2002 Layne Staley, the 34-year-old lead singer of Alice in Chains, was found dead in his home from a heroin and cocaine overdose. Isolated by addiction, Staley had lost contact with much of the outside world. At the time of his death, the 6-foot (1.8 m) musician weighed just 86 pounds (39 kg), and his body was so decomposed it had to be identified through dental records.