Major🎆Mustard

It's that weird bit between Good Friday and Easter Sunday where you don't know what day it is...

@Penny_Underbust Uppies?

Can anyone guess what three questions I get asked the most when walking around in public? 😜

@battyscarl If I could rewrite the alphabet, I'd have you sitting on my face. What's a pick-up line? 😬

GAME TIME 🥳 Drop your best cheesy pick up line, the one that makes me laugh the most, gets a surprise in their dm 👀😉

As if I just got ID’d here

Can't sleep, thoughts will eat me

@artofstumbling That's a magical ass photo you took there 🤩

@artofstumbling Better than mine, dude. Lookin good!

Happy Halloween... And moustache update. It's doing its best

Post a picture YOU took. Just a pic. No description.

Why is that first r even in February? Fucking pointless letter. Just embarrassing.

I radiate so much fucking heat, I hate it. I could make a living by hiring myself out to pensioners to stand in their living rooms all winter

@Lunamayj 20

Rate this curvy alt girls selfie on a scale of 1-10

@Frannyann I can technically do simple maths but it takes me longer than it used to and if im doing it in front of someone I just fall to pieces. Sometimes in my job I have to do calculations for customers and I just reach for my phone cause it saves time.

@israeldfirzt Yeah, I'm really fuckin lonely. What am I just supposed to miss out on movies?

Going to the cinema alone is a different level of lonely

@nerdylilpeach The Sundays - Wild Horses

what covers do you think are better than the original song?

@Frannyann Take it from me, it's not just women

I love watching The Thing reactions on YouTube cause the person has no idea what’s about to happen with the dog. This is my favorite reaction of it

@Frannyann Crazy right?

@Frannyann You won't be able to see it obvs, but facebook says we've been friends for 12 years 😜

@Lunamayj I'd buy you whatever you like 😍

Be honest if you saw me out and about would you buy me a coffee?

@Frannyann Bit shit!