(wipes hand across mouth, laughs)

As an American, much of the appeal of life in Japan, this exotic land, shrouded in mist and mystery, comes from those cultural elements that, while intellectually impenetrable, feel bizarrely seductive. You know, like having health care and not getting shot at the mall.

@AudreyPorne Not much. Sup over there?

Sup

how insensitive do you have to be to ridicule women in abusive relationships rather than help them lmao

Retweeting this to prove that I'm amazing in bed.

@OonaMcGee I was just thinking, most celebrities who come to Japan only really get the Japanese TV-show press experience, so if all you saw of Japan was owarai geinin and Kyari, it's no wonder the wacky Japan trope stays so strong. Good on Keanu.

Gotta love how Keanu heads out to far-flung prefectures away from Tokyo and Kyoto when visiting Japan for press junkets. He even stopped by Okayama to meet with a denim designer on this trip. soranews24.com/2019/09/10/kea… #KeanuReeves #キアヌリーブス #japan #JohnWick3

@uspellCoUrTNey Sure. If you're still doing it.

Respond to this and I’ll tell you what high school clique you were in

I'm grateful for Instagram because without it, I would have never known that I only have two acceptable facial expressions.

Daughter just told me she was going to "poop in my heart today." Honestly didn't expect her to do that until she was like 16.

@MsCongealiality I want to read the rest of this thread where you list thIngs you love.

@friendoftoads this is a very good tweet

Yup.

Hey check out this picture of Snoopy and... some fucking guy.

@pablopsaura @Party_Harderson And you replied with the same cockpit joke that every elementary school child has thought of since airplanes have been around. Also your subsequent reply makes NO SENSE in the context of her thread...

@pablopsaura @Party_Harderson I'm sad that it wasn't obvious the first time, but... I wasn't being sincere. @Party_Harderson created a multi-level work of art that satirizes social media influencer culture, the batshit insane "health trends" that flourish bc of it, and corporate sponsorship of it.

@uspellCoUrTNey If he tried to hit on you after, then I'm pretty sure that this is some seriously involved long-form negging.

Hey twitter an “artist” at the bar last night asked if he could draw my portrait as I read. Everyone say courtney you look nothing like that

@utachy @BobbyJudo Yes... But the English says "lifelog."

@meatshill @BobbyJudo Hello. Generally 生涯 means whole life but depending on the situation, its means lifetime which after someone retired their job. Accordingly, 生涯学習 means that keep learning while entire lifetime including after retired.

THE LIFELOG. LET ME TEACH YOU ITS WAYS.

@LuvPug @justsomegirl81 twitter.com/benfrenchman/s…

Unless it is sung by an actual seal, I never want to hear Kiss from a Rose ever again

@pablopsaura @Party_Harderson Patti, I thought that this thread was the funniest thing ever until I saw this reply. You've been outdone. Please turn your account over to Pablo immediately.

@Party_Harderson So that’s why they call it the cockpit?