Rosemary

Doris is a four-year-old Texel ewe on a fell in the Lake District. Doris is, according to several recent opinion pieces, destroying the planet. Let's check in on Doris. 6:30am - Doris began grazing. The fell she is grazing is semi-natural upland grassland. It has existed in this condition for approximately eight hundred years because sheep have been grazing it continuously for approximately eight hundred years. Without Doris, the coarse grasses outcompete the finer ones. The wildflowers disappear. The skylarks that nest at ground level lose the open sward they need and abandon the site. Doris does not know what a skylark is. She has found some good grass near the wall and that is the full extent of her agenda. 7:45am - Doris walked into the bog. This was not the plan. There was no plan. Doris extracted herself, turned around, and regarded the bog with the expression of an animal that has decided the bog started it. 9:00am - Doris found a gap in the wall and went through it. She was now in Brian's field. Brian's field is, by any measurable standard, identical to Doris's field. Doris is aware of this and does not consider it relevant. 10:30am - Doris was returned to her field. The farmer repaired the gap. Doris watched the repair with the focused attention of an animal taking measurements. 11:15am - Doris rolled into a dip in the fell and got cast. This means she ended up on her back and could not right herself because the weight of her fleece shifted her centre of gravity past the point of recovery. She lay there in the dip looking at the sky with the composure of an animal that has decided the sky is quite interesting actually. 11:40am - The farmer found her, righted her. Doris walked away at speed. No acknowledgement. Complete dignity. As though the last twenty-five minutes had happened to a different sheep. 1:00pm - Doris grazed the area around the base of the dry-stone wall. The grazing keeps the vegetation short enough that the wall's base stays dry and frost doesn't work into the joints and expand. The wall is two hundred and sixty years old. It will outlast everything currently being written about livestock farming if the vegetation around it is managed. It is being managed by Doris eating grass. Doris does not know she is doing conservation work. Doris has found something particularly good near the fourth stone from the bottom. 3:00pm - Doris produced manure. The manure will feed the soil microbiome. The soil microbiome will grow the grass. The grass will grow back where Doris has grazed it. The grazed areas will remain open enough for the tormentil and harebells to survive. The tormentil and harebells are why people drive three hours from Manchester to walk on this fell. This system has no external inputs. It has been running since Texel sheep were brought to these fells from the Netherlands in 1970 and discovered the gaps in the walls shortly afterward. 5:00pm - Doris lay down. The fell was quiet. The skylarks were still up. The wildflowers were still in the turf. 5:47pm - Doris found a new gap. She was in Brian's field again. Brian has started keeping a log.

I’m disgusted by the repeated attempts to frame desire for proper scrutiny as being some sort of subversion of process due to ‘undisclosed religious beliefs’. I don’t care what people’s beliefs are - but I do care about our parliamentarians doing their job properly which is exactly what the Lords is doing.