necrysi

*dunks u in Lava* thats for Not joining my Madness

Movie night 🩷

(indignantly) Japanese people are fucking weird (suddenly introspective) Probably because of what we did to them bomb wise

i cannot believe i am. here this is so Bazinga

oh my GOD so i was talking to a buddy in psychology and then this kid came in who looked exactly like him and gave him a book he'd forgotten at home and i went "holy shit you have a twin?!?" and he was like "yeah! his name is jason!" and i was like "????????” i thought YOUR name was jason" long story short i have one of them in my math class and another in my psychology class and i've developed a friendship with both of them but i thought they were the same person this entire time

‘Dune is about religious fundamentalism and the danger of charismatic lead-“ Actually it’s about the importance supply chain diversification

‘A little bird told me’? Well a huge fat one told me something else

(negging an ant that I’m talking to) You’re so small it’s probably not even worth talking to you lol you are so tiny Ant: noo im nottt

We did it!

answering the phone be like "hey" and then the CAGE COMES DOWN

I can't prove it but youtube is planting red bars underneath the thumbnails of videos that I definitely have not watched

(in love with you) (bursting at the seams to talk to you) (heart teeming chest aching) hey how are you

"you didn't tell anyone about pearl harbor" is of course wildly inappropriate but it's also socially ingenious as the president of america he's citing pearl harbor to the japanese . . . approvingly? you turn it over and over

“yeah but would u date urself” my guy i would go to war for someone like me

if that’s ur girl why she standing on my roblox head

Cranking hog or hogly cranking

when anyone else makes an easily avoidable mistake it’s totally fine it’s not a big deal and it’ll be ok. Unless you’re me which in That case i ruined everything i am a Failure and u can beat me with a cast iron skillet

Started watching Lord Of the Rings with my 8 year old daughter. After about 45 minutes she told me it's boring and isn't interested in watching it anymore... sometimes you just need to cut the negative people out of your life.

"you gotta play with the cards you're dealt" WRONG. i play pot of greed which lets me draw two additional cards from my deck

just overheard a woman say "i’m not being mean. i’m just not actively making you comfortable" and i'll be using that line forever

Reading God Emperor of Dune in public and scratching my head periodically to make sure people know I am unsure whether I agree with Leto II’s decisions or not