probablylostmykeys

Merriam-Webster’s human editors have chosen ‘slop’ as the 2025 Word of the Year.

This was categorically false

@1998ToyotaSimp Pain of Truth

@probablylostmy who the hell lmao

Best response to a fight at a show Vocalist just said “pause and start it again after this set. I wanna watch” and they did. lol.

I get emotionally attached to people who drive the same speed as me on long trips on the highway and the small heartbreak whenever we don’t take the same exit never gets easier.

“You can’t punch down on me when I’m standin on this full stack” - @first2burn

Me showing up at the function where everyone’s girlfriends are dressed cute and demure.

Was just reminded that Bruce LePage blocked me and I feel like i was given a little treat.

Opening band wall of death is craaazy.

There’s gotta be a direct correlation between old head Death Metal guys and androids. These phones busted af.

Evan’s wallpaper on any given day: picture of a river Evan’s wallpaper on tour: my boobs

I’m tired of talking shit and being a hater. I’m retiring.

I love seeing people standing in line for merch while the band they paid a shit ton of money to see is playing.

Imma get forklift certified just cause I got a few people id like to run over.

DREGGS from Little Rock, AR

@infinitegaze Never you. I will spell shit wrong tho

@probablylostmy Even me 🥺🥺🥺

I’m gonna start charging for writing set lists for all these fuckers.

Left handed and dyslexic and these asshole have me writing the word “sacrificial”

The vibes are leached from my body when a band asks the crowd to “put those fucking hands together.”

Newton’s 37th law: For every best band bracket there is an equal but opposite worst band bracket.