JoJo Beans

Search is full of ads and wrong answers. Every other email is an ad. Prime Video charges you and shows ads. Paramount? Ads. Peacock? YouTube? Hulu? Ads followed by more ads. Netflix full of ads. Meta and X, every other thing is an ad. Pinterest is nothing but ads. AI is in everything. AI finishes sentences incorrectly and won’t stop. AI reads your email and search history to target you with more ads. Every time you open an app or visit a site there’s an update making it worse. In a hurry? First, click here to agree to terms you don’t have time to read and must accept. You need an account to do that. Change your temporary password. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email and enter that code. Now use a passkey. Your password is too simple to remember. Change it. No, not like that. Now log on. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email for a code… Welcome back! We’ve updated our terms of service and privacy policy (you have none). Subscribe to the site. Subscribe to Netflix. Subscribe to toilet paper. Subscribe to these groceries. Pay a membership fee for the right to subscribe then tip your driver who delivers the subscriptions your membership lets you subscribe to. Time to work? We’ve got to update your laptop and will slow down everything you do until you agree to update. But first, click here to agree. Update installed — your laptop’s broken now. It doesn’t matter, since your boss just replaced you with AI. Go to your phone to complain on social media. Wait, your phone needs an update so we can add more AI. Click here. Oh sorry, your phone can’t handle this update. Now it’s useless. Go get the newest phone. Here’s a text from a friend, an email, a voice mail they left three days ago but you didn’t see until now because of sync problems with the cloud. It’s their GoFundMe. Their MLM. Their Patreon. Never mind, you didn’t respond to their text within 9 minutes and now you’re no longer friends. They blocked you. Make new friends. Download this app to find people in your area. In your neighborhood. On your street. Two doors down from you. Do you know this person yet, we think you’d get along. You need an account to use this app. That username is taken. Enter a password. Not that one, you used it on another site. You need to be connected to WiFi to download the app. Allow the app to connect to other devices on your network. Allow the app to access your contacts, know your precise location, store your credit card details. Oops, sorry, we got hacked now all that info is available on the web. There’s a class action suit. You can join. It’ll take a decade to get your $3.73 share of the ten billion settlement. We’ll send it via PayPal or deposit it to your bank, just tell us those details. Oh no, another hack. That info is circulating now, too. Here’s a spam call, a spam email, a spam text. Why are you angry? Why are you talking about getting rid of your phone? Why don’t you like AI, it lets us make all of this easier? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? This is progress. You’ll be left behind. Do you want to be left behind? Do you???

@CinemaTweets1 If it means anything, I really enjoy your insightful tweets! Sorry you had a tough few weeks, my guy.

It’s Friday. We survived. I can only speak for myself personally, but this week was brutal. To be totally honest, the last few weeks have been brutal. Which is why I find myself turning to Cinema more than ever. Whoever is reading this, I hope your weekend is filled with Cinema.

@BigBlueDrew33 Tee Ball is the funniest sports experience on the planet. Total chaos in the cutest fits.

This is going to be a struggle. Basketball requires less equipment, runs on a timer and is climate controlled. Not to mention less of a snooze fest than this.

Now that I’m a Little League Dad an immediate observation is the psychotic new-age expectation of EVERY kid on the team having their own bat. 14 bats?! None of these kids can even hit. 🤦‍♂️

@PranavSriraman @KangGangPod BARS!

LMFAOOOOOO damn 😭💔🕊️

@TheCinesthetic Saw it at the student center at UCSD as a sneak preview. The raucous college crowd got absolutely LEVELED. We all staggered out.

Imagine watching the “What’s in the box?” sequence for the first time in a packed theater in Se7en (1995), the realization hitting the audience a beat early and the room going silent as it lands. Absolutely insane.

@itsrosesm My mother’s name is Bernadette. My daughter was born on her actual birthday. So, obviously, we named her Bernadette. We call her Bernie for short.

@lukify @CinemaTweets1 And I loved it, and pondered it, every single time.

@quinnpeaks @CinemaTweets1 I always figured the show runners were required to produce some "next time on" bit, and they just spun a wheel of 2-3 second clips. It was completely senseless, like every single time.

Mad Men is experiencing a long overdue rebirth now that it’s on HBO Max, as early streaming numbers have shown that this show is a massive hit for HBO. I’m always here to support Mad Men because it helped usher in a golden age of television that I’ll always remember fondly.

@CinemaTweets1 It feels like a vacation… at least for the first half!

The Talented Mr. Ripley feels like a turning point in cinema, in that so many young A List actors had a chance to shine in this film: Matt Damon, Jude Law, Gwyneth Paltrow, Cate Blanchett, and Philip Seymour Hoffman are all outstanding in this movie. This is a beautiful film.

Fun Fact: Many of the musicians on “Buena Vista Social Club” were in their 70s, 80s, and even 90s when they recorded. Their voices and playing carry decades of Havana’s musical history, and Ry Cooder captured it all in just six days of live, largely improvised sessions.

@PicturesFoIder I remember seeing this poster at Leopold’s in Berkeley… and just stopping in my tracks. Staring in disbelief.

Surely the best poster in history.

It’s starting to sound like firing everyone possible, fucking over our trading partners, crushing small businesses with tariffs, and completely kneecapping tourism hasn’t had the positive impact on the economy we all thought it would

@UnnecRoughness The bidding was there… Cal Alumni just stepped up with the NIL.

Jaron-Keawe Sagapolutele will return to Cal for the 2026 season So much for that off-season bidding war

@BFW Cal Lupoi

New coaching hire rankings, top 10 1 LSU Kiffin 2 Virginia Tech Franklin 3 Penn St Campbell 4 Michigan St Fitzgerald 5 Kansas State Klein 6 Kentucky Stein 7 Auburn Golesh 8 JMU SunBelt Billy 9 Florida Sumrall 10 Oklahoma State Morris

every generation sees their culture fade into the past & change into something else. it’s inevitable. but now it seems like instead of changing into another form of culture, what’s fading away is the concept of having a culture itself. we’re on a trajectory to *only having jobs*.

David Zaslav giving PTA $150 million to make OBAA is like making your dog a steak before you put it down

@maxkellerman on @BillSimmons was the best sports pod I’ve heard in years. THAT was a fun, ranging, and insightful conversation. Sign me up for more that, please, @ringer

@BaySean @ringer @BillSimmons @TheCousinSal He only included them so he could get off a Brady GOAT comp.

@ringer @BillSimmons @TheCousinSal Poor Chiefs fans who’ve seen 3 SB wins and 2 other SB appearances in the last 7 years. Read the room.

Steelers? Ravens? Lions? Chiefs? @BillSimmons and @TheCousinSal discuss which NFL fan base should be the most depressed.

@EvanSowards Too soon 😫

Lamar doing his best Brock Purdy impression