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In 1953, George and Barbara Bush lost their daughter Robin to leukemia. She was three years old. Barbara's hair turned white that year — she was 28. By anyone's expectation, mine included, their grief should have defined the rest of their lives.
Instead they made a decision: they would wake up every morning and be happy. It's an almost astounding level of mental discipline. The ability not to ignore your horrible loss but to say life is not over. I can choose how I feel.
It's not a coincidence that he became president and she raised one. More importantly, they stayed married 73 years. "You have two choices," she said decades later. "You can be happy or you can be unhappy. Just choose to be happy." This is what's key: that mindset wasn't influencing the outcome. The mindset was the outcome.
We tend to think of resilience as a trait people have, but it looks more like a series of small decisions, made unglamorously, that become habitual. Eventually, you'll even forget you're making them. The Bushes figured this out 70 years before the placebo sleep researchers did. Worth taking seriously.
Brandon Luu, MD@BrandonLuuMD
Literally just having a delusional golden retriever mindset measurably changes outcomes and physiology. Sleep badly? Convince yourself you're well rested. Stressful day? Convince yourself it's fuel. Failed? Convince yourself it's useful data.
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