James Stanley

That 200mg of caffeine in Celsius is actually 392mg in the US

I love my fans

Just when I thought birds couldn’t get more cool

Best part about break checking a jeep is watching all the ducks fly off the dashboard.

He is not bald he is unhaired

Headlights are too bright nowadays and it’s very unsafe. Last night someone had such bright headlights I started seeing those spots when I blinked. Very dangerous, could barely see what I was texting.

Your doomsday prepping vs my doomsday prepping. We’re not the same 💅

Ok you’re bleeding from the head. That’s good. that means you’re getting all the injury out

in the corner straight up “losin it" and by “it” , haha, well lets just say... My religion

the first rule of gun safety is to have fun

no country for young sheldon

Is Hank Hill the the first Fortnite skin to have a narrow urethra?

The people who are mad about the Vikings male cheerleader are ironically the same people who hate women sports. Wouldn’t they want all the cheerleaders replaced with better, stronger, faster athletes?

Ah welp, time to create art and content and stop being a consumer of slop. But first I need inspiration so ill scroll on my phone and cycle through the same 5 apps for three hours. Yes. This is good.

You know things are bad when your Uber driver doesn’t have Spotify premium.

When can we get a pinch bridge of nose emoji

U think fish ever see you reel up fast after a bad cast and think “what the hell that’s the fastest bug I’ve ever seen”

Yeah youre on fucking pot dude Im leaving

@hipearlrose @MaskedLizard_ Oh yes

@MaskedLizard_ @sweetbbjame this your kinda guy

His greed pleases me

Love going to a coffee shop to scroll on my phone right in front of my laptop.

Off an edible and throwing a pizza in the oven is the longest 14 min wait of ur life