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matt!

@the_shmoob

the michael jordan of being a son of a bitch

Katılım Temmuz 2014
376 Takip Edilen386 Takipçiler
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abcdent
abcdent@abcdentminded·
I always said that Genius Dot Com should only show you two thirds of the lyrics and then make your phone really hot, it's so cool that they're willing to listen to their users' ideas
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refriedbuttsects
refriedbuttsects@refriedbuttsect·
𝐦𝐞: wow san antonio is so rich with culture 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞: 卍♡𝑗𝑒𝑠𝑠𝑒 + 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑎 ♡卍
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Greg Gallant
Greg Gallant@GallantGreg·
If only there were a term for getting so unexpectedly hit with devastating information
Greg Gallant tweet media
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Lurkin' Mom
Lurkin' Mom@LurkAtHomeMom·
Whoever named Red Delicious apples was off their meds that day.
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BlueJay, Tianqiao Star of #pinkytwt
If I was a serial killer I’d choose my victims randomly but they’d all have some sort of shared trait I wasn’t aware of and was maybe selecting subconsciously which would eventually be used to figure out my next target first and capture me. Fuck I get mad just thinking about it
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Wiretaup
Wiretaup@wiretaup·
Absolutely wild that WCW was sinking like the Titanic and million year old Terry Funk was like "Aw shucks, guess I'll give it my all"
Joe Gagne@joegagne

Terry nooooo

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Mr. Chau
Mr. Chau@Srirachachau·
Tom Waits is awesome because his wife by all accounts made him much weirder, turning him onto his hobo circus shit
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FOST
FOST@GeorgeFoster72·
Neighbor on his back porch randomly singing The Big Show theme song. It’s too early to be drunk…
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carter hambley
carter hambley@carterhambley·
getting a haircut at Great Clips feels like when a criminals bleeding out in a movie and goes to a vet
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wapital
wapital@wapital3·
i read that 40% of americans don’t have $500 and stopped honking at people, these people gonna blow my head smooth off
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josh (oldfriend99)
josh (oldfriend99)@oldfriend99·
"The Boys are Back in Town" is meant to sound celebratory. But to those of us like myself who considered the boys our friends, it can hurt hearing it second-hand, like I'm the last one to find out
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victor
victor@40sqft·
icl i ain’t know iggy pop had scoliosis i thought that was his swag lean
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Luke Weston
Luke Weston@lukeweston·
Monster is switched on enough to know they can’t muck around with grapefruit Monsty.
Luke Weston tweet media
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