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@Theholisticpsyc @_aaselenophilee This can be easily misinterpreted.

@_aaselenophilee Taking care of ourselves is never selfish

For years I was an “over-understander” I tried to understand where everyone was coming from. Made excuses. Told myself things would change. I thought it was my responsibility to accommodate. In reality, my responsibility is: to take care of me. Not to decode other people’s behavior.

@DrDoyleSays Quite a narcissistic take IMO. Morals are there for s reason, to regulate interpersonal relationships. You don't owe an apology for cheating on your spouse because you feel and need it? Think it twice.

You don't owe anyone an apology for existing. You don't owe anyone an apology for feeling. You don't owe anyone an apology for having preferences. Or wanting something. Or needing something. And you don't owe anyone an apology for NOT being exactly what they want or need.

@InternetH0F 🤣🤣

😭

@Theholisticpsyc That sounds like love to me

Maturity is giving up the adrenaline of chasing love to settle into the ease of a true partner. Someone who pushes you to be the best version of yourself. Someone who invests in “we” instead of “I.”

@sweatystartup Finding normal people is very difficult.

Successful entrepreneurs will tell you the key to success is "finding great people." That is bullshit and is not realistic for most. The key is building a company that can thrive and make money with perfectly normal people.

@sweatystartup I suppose these stats are just made up and not backed up by any reliable source? A very familiar scenario: working in a non-profit or any other sensitive problem (ie. Health or mental care). No resources for hiring and delegation, but you do care for the people affected.

If you’re working 70 hours a week you have one of three problems: 1) you are a poor delegator. This is the most likely scenario (95%) 2) you have too much ego, believe you’re too special, and incorrectly believe only you can do the job. This is very common (4.9%) 3) you’re in too hard of a business. There are some businesses that just can’t be scaled. The market sucks and nobody has done it before you. You’re solving a problem that doesn’t exist and trying to climb an impossible mountain. This is rare (.1%)

What is ignored or neglected by the media -- but will be studied by historians? Here's the full list of 25 examples:

@Theholisticpsyc Safe people also understand about boundaries and the importance of respecting others time. Consistently making people wait or not showing up is very disrespectful.

Safe people lack a sense of urgency and a desire to control. They don’t make demands or ultimatums because they value their own autonomy. They know compassion and connection is the way to get their needs met, not coercion.

@seconds_0 Adults too?

My most unsubstantiated parenting belief is children should be barefoot as much as possible from the moment they can walk to ensure their feet grow right

@Theholisticpsyc Saving love takes 2 people.

What is the most important thing you learned in your last relationship?

@JasonRo35771763 @Theholisticpsyc Letting go a little bit can help you. Talking about it is a way of letting go.

@Theholisticpsyc I always struggle with they idea of letting be yourself. So much in conflict with communicate your needs, or balance out the chores.

The best relationships: we take care of each other, and let each other be ourselves. We depend on each other without self betrayal. We respect each other and affirm our capability to do difficult things.

@Theholisticpsyc @saliabbasraza Everyone can change but many won't change. Particularly narcissists.

@saliabbasraza I believe anyone can change. BPD, narcissistic traits... these are attachment wounds. When people ask “can someone who’s narcissistic change?” They’re often actually asking... can I change them? The answer is no. Change is internal.

Narcissistic traits come from our childhood developmental years. We need a secure childhood connection to develop a sense of self. If: - emotional needs weren’t met -connections were unpredictable and chaotic - a parent was ‘hands off’ and the child raised themselves - a child became a parent to their parent (parentification) .... a healthy sense of self can’t develop. Narcissism is the lack of a healthy and full sense of self. The traits will mirror traits found in children: - emotional impulsivity - emotional reactivity - self centering - inability to self reflect - control/manipulation (an attempt to find safety) - entitlement Those with narcissistic traits are still stuck within early stages of childhood development. Stunted emotionally, they use relationships to feel some sense of control to mask their internal chaos.

@Theholisticpsyc I don't get this one, you never ask for anything? Like equally distributing the household load? Or maybe stop an addiction?

The number one sign a relationship won’t work is: you want to change something about your partner. The more you want them to change, the more friction and resentment will come. Ask yourself: if nothing about my partner changed, could I be ok with that?

@Theholisticpsyc Isn't it about meeting half way?

You don’t need to betray yourself to be loved.

@learnbpd Self-awareness is quite a step. Then therapy, do it for real, not to just chat with someone. Dig deep into the stuff that hurts. The more it hurts the closer you are getting to what needs healing.

do you guys have good tips or things in general that helps coping with borderline personality disorder? i swear it seems like no matter what i try it doesn't work

@VisceralVixen69 @Enciphered @narcsupport101 What I don't get is how can you self asses as BPD and not fix it? It has 85% recovery chance with therapy. The main problem with BPD in my opinion is the lack of self awareness. Said differently, most of the time if you are mad at someone you are misinterpreting.

@Enciphered @narcsupport101 Thank you. I hate the common misconceptions and rumors of borderlines. The stereotypes are just cruel and foolish. I hate when people think we are the monsters. If you're gonna spread facts, spread FACTS, not poor stereotypes.