Chris Eagan

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Chris Eagan

Chris Eagan

@ceagan

Technogeek

Blacksburg, VA Присоединился Şubat 2008
201 Подписки141 Подписчики
Chris Eagan ретвитнул
Peter Girnus 🦅
Peter Girnus 🦅@gothburz·
I have two stacks on my desk. The left stack is financial disclosure forms from members of Congress. The right stack is waivers for members who filed their financial disclosures late. The right stack is always taller. On Wednesday morning, I watched a soldier get arrested on CNN. I am a Disclosure Analyst for the House Ethics Committee. I have held this position for eleven years. My job is to receive the forms, verify their completeness, and file them. I do not investigate. I do not flag. I do not refer. I file. I have a lanyard. The lanyard says ETHICS. The soldier's name is Gannon Ken Van Dyke. He is thirty-eight years old. He was stationed at Fort Bragg. He was Special Forces. In December, he created an account on a prediction market called Polymarket. On January 2nd, he bet $32,500 that the president of Venezuela would be removed from power. On January 3rd, he helped remove the president of Venezuela from power. He collected $409,881. He has been charged with five federal crimes. Commodities fraud. Wire fraud. Unlawful use of confidential government information. Theft of nonpublic government information. Unlawful monetary transaction. The Department of Justice called it "the first-ever insider trading prosecution on event contracts." I watched this on the television in our break room. Then I walked back to my desk and processed a late financial disclosure from a member of the House Financial Services Committee who purchased $250,000 in bank stocks eleven days before his subcommittee held a closed-door hearing on proposed capital reserve changes. The filing was forty-seven days late. The STOCK Act requires disclosure within forty-five days. The penalty for late filing is $200. I waived it. I waive most of them. In 2021, fifty-four members of Congress and senior staff violated the reporting rules. The fines were minimal. Most were waived. I have a form for the waiver. The form has a box that says "Reason." I write "administrative delay." In ethics, "administrative delay" means the member's office forgot and then remembered when a reporter called. My approval rate is one hundred percent. In any other field, that number would trigger an audit. In mine, it is called thoroughness. Let me show you what I processed this year. January. A senator on the Armed Services Committee sold defense contractor shares worth $1.2 million. Three days later, his committee received a classified briefing that the Iran campaign had exceeded its projected cost by 340%. The stock dropped 8%. He filed the disclosure sixty-one days late. I calculated the fine. $200. His chief of staff asked if it could be waived. He did not ask what the senator traded on. Nobody asks that. The form does not have a field for it. I waived the fine. The senator's portfolio returned 23.4% in 2025. The S&P 500 returned 16.8%. February. A representative on the Energy and Commerce Committee bought pharmaceutical stocks worth $400,000. Two weeks later, her committee advanced a bill that would extend patent exclusivity for the exact drug class she purchased. The stocks rose 14%. She filed on time. There was no fine. There was no investigation. There was nothing to investigate because buying stocks in companies regulated by your own committee is not illegal. It is legal. The STOCK Act made it legal by making it disclosed. In Congress, disclosed means legal. In my office, legal means filed. March. A member whose spouse manages a portfolio worth $9.2 million reported forty-three separate transactions in a single quarter. Twelve of them were in sectors directly affected by legislation the member co-sponsored. The timing on eight of those twelve was within a two-week window of committee action. I logged all forty-three. None were flagged. We do not flag. We file. I asked my supervisor once what would happen if I flagged a filing. She said we do not have a form for that. I never asked again. In 2020, I processed 847 disclosures. In 2023, 1,211. In 2025, 1,614. The number of enforcement actions in each of those years was zero. The numerator changes. The denominator does not. I want to tell you about the soldier again. He made $409,881. He tried to delete his Polymarket account by calling customer service and saying he lost access to his email. He moved his profits into a foreign cryptocurrency vault and then into a new brokerage account. He used his real identity. He placed thirteen bets. Every single one was connected to an operation he personally participated in. In my eleven years, I have processed disclosures from members of Congress who traded on: Pending FDA approvals they learned about in committee. Defense appropriations they voted on. Trade policy they negotiated. Pandemic response measures they drafted. Interest rate decisions they were briefed on before the public. None of them have been charged. None of them have been investigated by the Department of Justice. None of them have been referred to the SEC. The STOCK Act has produced zero prosecutions since it was signed on April 4th, 2012. Fourteen years. Five hundred and thirty-five members. $635 million in trades last year alone. Zero cases. My daughter asked me once what happens when someone breaks the rules. I told her we write it down. She asked what happens after that. I said it depends. She was nine. She is twenty now. It does not depend. Nothing happens after that. The soldier made $409,881 and faces decades in prison. Nancy Pelosi entered Congress in 1987 with a portfolio worth approximately $785,000. It is now worth $133.7 million. That is a return of 16,930%. The Dow Jones returned 2,300% over the same period. Professional fund managers who beat the market for three consecutive years are considered exceptional. She has beaten it for thirty-seven. If a hedge fund produced those returns, the SEC would subpoena the records on a Thursday. She produced them from a building with a chapel and a gift shop. She announced her retirement last year. No investigation was opened. No disclosure was flagged. Her filings were on time. In my office, on time means compliant. Compliant means closed. I want to tell you about the fine. $200. That is the maximum penalty for violating the STOCK Act's disclosure requirements. $200 for a member of Congress whose portfolio gained $4.7 million in a single quarter. I calculated what $200 represents as a percentage of $4.7 million. It is 0.004%. I could not find a comparison that made it meaningful. It is less than the price of the parking pass in the Rayburn garage. It is less than lunch at the members' dining room if you order the crab cakes, which I am told are excellent though I eat at my desk. Since 2012, thirty-one bills have been introduced to restrict congressional trading. I keep a list. The list is longer than the STOCK Act itself. On March 5th, 2026, a representative from Michigan introduced the thirty-second. He called it the "No Getting Rich in Congress Act." The bill would prohibit the President, Vice President, members of Congress, and their spouses from trading individual stocks, cryptocurrency, futures, and commodities while in office. The bill was referred to committee. The committee has not scheduled a hearing. The committee is chaired by a member whose spouse executed $2.1 million in trades last year. The bill will be reviewed. In my office, reviewed means read. Read means acknowledged. Acknowledged means a status has been assigned. A status is the absence of an action that has been given a name so it looks like one. The soldier used classified information to make $409,881 on a prediction market. He has been charged with five federal crimes. The Department of Justice announced the case on the same day I processed three disclosures from members who traded on committee knowledge worth a combined $3.8 million. The difference between the soldier and the members is not what they did. It is the building they did it in. He did it from Fort Bragg. They did it from the Capitol. He used a prediction market. They used the New York Stock Exchange. He bet on a military operation. They bet on the legislation they write. He did not write the law. They did. They wrote the STOCK Act. Then they funded its enforcement at zero dollars. Then they set its maximum penalty at $200. Then they gave my office the authority to waive it. Then they traded $635 million. The soldier flew to Caracas. He breached a compound. He put his body between a mission and a bullet. The people who ordered the operation were in a building with a credenza and sparkling water. They did not go to Caracas. They went to their brokerage accounts. The soldier made $409,881 and is now in federal custody. The people who knew what he was going to do before he did it made more and filed less. His prosecution is not a failure of the system. It is the system. One conviction per decade, at the lowest level, so the briefing slides can say enforcement exists. The $409,881 is not the crime. It is the cost of making $635 million look supervised. In my field, we call this self-regulation. The soldier's Polymarket account has been frozen. His military career is over. He will spend years in federal prison. My office will process every congressional disclosure filed this year. Every trade logged. Every $200 fine calculated and waived. The system is immaculate. Fourteen years. Zero prosecutions. $635 million a year. A 16,930% return. I have not leaked a document. I have not filed a complaint. I have not deviated from the process one single time. The process was written by the people whose forms I process. As long as the disclosures go up and the cases don't, my performance review says I am meeting expectations. My lanyard still says ETHICS. In eleven years, nobody has asked me to define the word.
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
This is going to help so many people.
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@truthandtesla Put it on FSD, then make a heart shape with both hands. They know not how their minds have been corrupted.
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Cybertruckmama
Cybertruckmama@truthandtesla·
I get flipped off on the daily driving my CT in the portland area. I cannot think of the way I want to respond- but I want to. I usually am just in a state of shock (similar feeling I had when I was 12 on my bike on my paper route when a guy pulled up next to me, honked and exposed himself). I digress. I don’t want to respond with more hate, but with some kind of thought provoking statement, that cuts through it. It can’t be audible because the exchange is so fast. And it has to be clever because it must disarm. Share this so more people can help me figure this out?
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@elonmusk It would be cool if there was one at Disney Springs in Florida…
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Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️
Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️@BaronDestructo·
It all comes down to this! The search for our ship's Techie concludes (The Championship) Choose -
Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️ tweet mediaJoseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️ tweet media
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@DSORacing @ayrtonsenna The scariest part of this is how he’s clearly driving on the limit and he has no helmet.
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David Sánchez Olmos 🇲🇽 🌳
Este es un recuerdo que dejó huella en mi vida. @ayrtonsenna rodando en el circuito corto de Suzuka manejando en el Honda NSX-R. Vean el punta-tacon y las manos saliendo de Spoon. Pueden guardarlo en sus favoritos.
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Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️
Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️@BaronDestructo·
The search for our ship's Techie continues (The Elite Eight) Choose -
Joseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️ tweet mediaJoseph Mallozzi 🏴‍☠️ tweet media
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Tesla
Tesla@Tesla·
Try the latest version of FSD Supervised!
Elon Musk@elonmusk

@wholemars Yeah, it’s like getting an iPhone after only using flip phones

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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@syouukkEVO5 I wanted this as my first car, but it was a bit too expensive at the time. I ended up with a manual civic coupe instead. I still have it and love it!
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翔
@ukksyouevo5·
よくよく考えたら、免許取って初めてのクルマがマニュアルでしかもランエボって頭おかしいよな🤪
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Soapbubble
Soapbubble@dratsfoiled·
We need a handicap parking toggle much like HOV lane. With FSD returning independence to many this seems like a sorely overlooked feature. I also would like to set a preference to reverse into parking but that’s just me wanting true end to end and not having to take over at home.
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Tesla AI
Tesla AI@Tesla_AI·
New release of FSD Supervised now starting to roll out This update brings 20% faster reaction time to further increase safety, among many other improvements Full release notes below Full Self-Driving (Supervised) v14.3 includes - Upgraded the Reinforcement Learning (RL) stage of training the FSD neural network, resulting in improvements in a wide variety of driving scenarios. - Upgraded the neural network vision encoder, improving understanding in rare and low-visibility scenarios, strengthening 3D geometry understanding, and expanding traffic sign understanding. - Rewrote the AI compiler and runtime from the ground up with MLIR, resulting in 20% faster reaction time and improving model iteration speed. - Mitigated unnecessary lane biasing and minor tailgating behaviors. - Increased decisiveness of parking spot selection and maneuvering. - Improved parking location pin prediction, now shown on a map with a (P) icon. - Enhanced response to emergency vehicles, school buses, right-of-way violators, and other rare vehicles. - Improved handling of small animals by focusing RL training on harder examples and adding rewards for better proactive safety. - Improved traffic light handling at complex intersections with compound lights, curved roads, and yellow light stopping – driven by training on hard RL examples sourced from the Tesla fleet. - Improved handling for rare and unusual objects extending, hanging, or leaning into the vehicle path by sourcing infrequent events from the fleet. - Improved handling of temporary system degradations by maintaining control and automatically recovering without driver intervention, reducing unnecessary disengagements. Upcoming Improvements - Expand reasoning to all behaviors beyond destination handling. - Add pothole avoidance. - Improve driver monitoring system sensitivity with better eye gaze tracking, eye wear handling, and higher accuracy in variable lighting conditions.
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tomo
tomo@ae86_twins·
日本の象徴と言えば🤔そうです‼️富士山🗻桜🌸AE86😑・・・調子に乗りました🙇‍♂️ 冗談はさておき😅今回特に外国の方からたくさんの“いいね”をいただけたのは🌸さくらの美しさに尽きると思うんですよね😌 まぁ俺のトレノがカッコイイ(※単なる自己満です)のは間違い無いですけど🤣
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倉津ゆえ
倉津ゆえ@YueKuratsu·
これ使ってた人いますか? 私の周りだとフロッピーディスクの次世代は圧倒的に3.5インチのMOが多くて、これの実物を見たことがないくらいです😅
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Sawyer Merritt
Sawyer Merritt@SawyerMerritt·
NASA’s Artemis II livestream really makes you appreciate @SpaceX’s launch broadcasts. Bad camera tracking, no onboard cameras, countdown timer disappeared, NASA even showed people in the crowd instead of stage separation lol. The screen also blacked out twice during the first 10 seconds of the launch.
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Chris Eagan ретвитнул
NASA
NASA@NASA·
We're going around the Moon. Come watch with us. Artemis II's four-astronaut crew is lifting off from @NASAKennedy on an approximately 10-day mission that will bring us closer to living on the Moon and Mars. The launch window opens at 6:24pm ET (2224 UTC). twitter.com/i/broadcasts/1…
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Elon Musk
Elon Musk@elonmusk·
Custom orders of the Tesla Model S & X have come to an end. All that’s left are some in inventory. We will have an official ceremony to mark the ending of an era. I love those cars. This was me at production launch 14 years ago:
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@elonmusk So many people STILL don’t know what’s happening with FSD and how it is going to change their lives for the better. When it goes unsupervised, there needs to be a Super Bowl ad.
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Elon Musk
Elon Musk@elonmusk·
FSD 14.3 is in Tesla employee beta now and will probably go to wide release end of week
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Chris Eagan
Chris Eagan@ceagan·
@tuke_tan You have so many beautiful cars! 🤩
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Tuke-Tan
Tuke-Tan@tuke_tan·
ここ最近🇺🇸ネタが話題だけど個人的に一番嬉しいのはアメリカ人に家を褒められること。先日もキリスト教の布教に来たWashington出身の青年にADTの看板が大ウケ。
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JC Christopher
JC Christopher@JCChristopher·
I went to the exact same location of the Cybertruck accident shown in the Fox News video. This is the US-69/59 Eastex Freeway northbound HOV lane at the Y-split near the Eastex Park & Ride exit (approaching from downtown Houston toward Humble). In the Fox News video, the vehicle failed to follow the right curve, going straight into the barrier. Well, I tested it twice today with Tesla FSD engaged the entire time with zero human intervention. And unless you think I am a hologram speaking to you from another dimension now, it worked out really well. Here is the video of me taking the exact same curve twice, with Tesla FSD v14.2.2.5.
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