Dave Yates

Comedy Club pay hasn’t changed in 30 years.

What do I think of the Trump Elon split? It’s TARIFFIC!

It’s been bugging me, but I finally figured it out.

@BridgetPhetasy Honey you didn’t make me C - U - M

A hilarious thing about having a toddler is just randomly spelling words in conversation with your spouse even when the toddler isn’t around.

@tim_ungaro37 I got that part figured out hahaha

@YatesComedy Track spikes, used by sprinters mostly

Any shoe collectors have any info on these? Value? Found at an estate sale

@Intuitionskate @NickDePaula Thanks dude!

@NickDePaula 👀👟

Oh an economic black out you say? So the thoughts and prayers of school shootings. Got it.

These are the faces of people who jacked off to the files

@AliNotAlli I knew you were on it

If you’re writing jokes about Gene, you’re a hack, man.

Any #phish people coming to LA- just announced my Wook Comedy show. Get tix

Yo @LAFD

Spoken like a true neck beard music dweeb

@Thiessen90Xx @Osint613 @FBI Call the Feet Boy Inspector!

@Osint613 @FBI do your job and imprison the person or people that did this

NEW 🔴 Screens at the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development were hacked today, displaying the message: “LONG LIVE THE REAL KING.”

Finally the real computer dorks do something

@riverportgin Boulder and Chicago for me

@YatesComedy unfortunately im unable to :( gonna /try/ to hit some shows over the summer, and i’ll be at b&b!

I live in a super rural area and one of my favorite phish twitter experiences so far has been finding out that one of my followers lives literally 10 minutes down the road from me - what are the odds

Here’s the thing about “Free Speech” comedians- they just want to punch-fuck words into their acts to be edgy. You’re actually hurting free speech. By not writing actual jokes- you prevent good comedians from the freedom to use them. It still has to be funny. Ya fuckin’ dweebs.

I got to talk to Rosebud Baker for the LA Times about her new special The Mother Lode out on Netflix NOW and spoiler, it's sooo funny but read this first thank youuu! latimes.com/entertainment-…

Come see a show and buy hot sauce in LA or the Central Coast CA this week.