smoops

@thirdmetax Wild of I was in a relationship with a dude rich enough to need a prenup then I would absolutely be expecting all of these things

Divorce lawyer James Sexton reveals the most outrageous prenup demands he has ever seen that ended the relationship “her lawyer called me and said you’re gonna wanna put me on mute so you can laugh out loud when you hear this list” “she wanted a personal monthly allowance for cosmetic procedures Botox,lashes,hair and nails a certain number of vacations per year that had to be private or first class and a push present for each baby” “he went yeah no it’s not happening no problem I just won’t even marry her if that’s what she wants”

@thegrandame Well I tried to get her hired

lmao which hw fan made up the rumor about Jennifer Tilly?

@fairyprxncess Bogtrotter

what's the first word that comes to mind when you see this cake?

@1ssve I don't. I just mispell theirs

How do you professionally say “please spell my name correctly in an email” in corporate?

@Quartzjixler If you can't join em fuckin beat em

Trying to finish this love poem. What rhymes with "Pythagorean Theorem?"

I will take all credit if this ends up being true

@dontcrosscrease @bravooomg @JenniferTilly Amen, I have been campaigning for this for weeks!!!!

@bravooomg Don’t play about this. If you’re making this up you’re hurting people. Stop the violence. @JenniferTilly can you confirm? #whitelotus

Allegedly, #RHOBH’s own Jennifer Tilly is in early talks to replace Helena Bonham Carter in ‘THE WHITE LOTUS’ Season 4 with an official announcement expected later this week.

@sachabrady @MerriamWebster Seperate is actually absolutely my nemessis

@MerriamWebster Separate v desperate. Only learned how which has the middle 'a' and which a middle 'e' by exaggerating their pronunciation.

What word is your spelling nemesis? This is a safe space.

@dorindadeadly Ridiculous, if it's not @JenniferTilly I'm not watching

Britani Bateman has been approached to replace Helena Bonham Carter in Season 4 of ‘The White Lotus’ #RHOSLC

@SomaKazima2 The outcome fyi

That narrator can BACK up a little bit omg???

Only 7 people on Facebook wished my Happy Birthday today, down from 21 last year. Is this a sign of social media usage shift or have I just been a c*nt

@BigBirdfyx Hahaha most men would be lucky to get it down a leg

so...penis having people...y'all just...walk around...with ur penis in one leg of your jeans? how do u choose? can u switch leg sleeves in public? does it get caught in your zipper? does it chafe?

@CrazyDaysPoster They had to fire her to make room for @JenniferTilly to join the cast of White Lotus season 4

Saturday, April 25, 2026 Blind Item #1 The foreign born actress is just on too many meds which is why she was fired from a hit show.

@DanReese21 Sir, I am Australian and I think you underestimate just how many pies I eat with sauce

When I used to run Heinz Ketchup I was always pushing to do "lifetime supply" promos. It's brilliant bc of the massive gap between customer excitement and actual cost to the company. People would FREAK OUT after winning a lifetime supply of ketchup. You'd think they won the lottery. Usually it just ends up being a large gift card. For a lifetime supply it'd only be ~$500-$1K. And that's retail, not product cost (true cost to the co). An even easier promo almost any biz can run is "a year's supply of X". Customers still freak out and the cost is quite low, esp relative to other marketing tactics. If you build a solid campaign around "Free X for a Year" promise you'll get great engagement. Ketchup is great bc it's a low ticket item. A year's supply of Heinz Ketchup is like $50 retail. 😂 Highly encourage you to give it a try if it makes sense for your biz.

@kyle4prezident Omg does this mean there's still time to cast @JenniferTilly for White Lotus?!

so what’s the helena bonham carter tea. in mike white we trust but what’s up

@FoxNews I literally can't tell if this is satire

BREAKING: Justice Department announces it's readopting the firing squad as a means of execution

@omgsidewalks I got a stomach bug in Thailand. Shat out everything I had ever eaten in the previous 5 years over 2-3 days, could barely keep in water. Lost heaps

what's the fastest way you've ever lost weight ?

@YourAnonOne Alcohol

Name a huge scam.

No. I AM fucking angry I just met a couple in their 60s that flew SINGAPORE business class, he works at a bowls club and she was in HR. Our generation will never be able to do that based on those jobs

@BrandiGlanville It's my birthday on Sunday and I'm on holiday in Thailand, and I am really hoping my boyfriend has bought me drinking and tweeting to read next to the pool!

so many ideas and I write all the time.