*burp*

@ghoulbasement Toothpaste, it'll look worse but it will play.

This disc is doner than done, Mr. eBay Guy...

@TheWealthMill @AdviserCounsel It's real estate, the same as mattress stores.

@AdviserCounsel My father in law is a construction PM in Maryland. He says they’re building a “large, automated” one with a quote of $16M 😂 Don’t see a path to profitability with that building cost unless its sole purpose is washing money.

There are 2 car washes within a short distance of each other in our town. Someone is building a brand new one. I just don’t see the demand to support it. Do these things print money? Is it like self storage?

@TaryxShadow @Indikur No

@Indikur Thats why we gotta bring the institutions back. Some of these people are never gonna help themselves.

remember niggas tried to help him and he was like "fuck no we geeked" so real

@johnstaff @mikeman4w Is that really the point?

@mikeman4w Why don’t you get your doc to call in a prescription?

I’m in the middle of the country and I decided to buy a motorcycle two days later enjoying my cross country ride I realized I’m hyper allergic to bee stings and I don’t have an EpiPen! I walked into CVS talked to the pharmacist, she said the only way to get an EpiPen is to go see a Dr. and get a prescription. Secretary, Kennedy, you realize how ridiculous this is right? Please fix. @SecKennedy

@ErinSpksLoudr @mikeman4w You can get epinephrine in an inhaler over the counter. You are talking out of your ass.

@mikeman4w It’s epinephrine friend, it’s not an over the counter thing. And shouldn’t be. People would abuse it and die more readily than on heroin. I’m a physician, I know people and addicts. Don’t forget an epi again or go to instacare and get a script.

@AllisonWeather It takes a tornado to wake me to, thanks.

Severe storms move into Cincinnati tomorrow night. The primary threat is damaging wind (~70mph) but embedded tornadoes are very possible within the line. Have multiple ways to get warnings that will *wake you up*. Timing is midnight-5AM.

@robi71269 @KullTheTortle @Maverick_SZN When I was 15 I could eat 4000 k a day and not gain a pound. I weighed 120lbs. It's mostly genetics in my opinion.

@KullTheTortle @Maverick_SZN Lmao. Define “how little”. 2000 calories? Or 10,000? 🤨

6’8 Slovenian with weight gain right after turning 20 I’ve seen this before

@ClipGD @Maverick_SZN If your dad was the most hated man in the world...

@Maverick_SZN What College does to a mf 💀

@Clobazamman @fleshsimulator @gape_gilbe24120 Just hope he doesn't find a girl that is obsessed. He could go back to regular schedule and she would decimate you fools.

@fleshsimulator @gape_gilbe24120 Is that what you would've named your band of rapelings if your girl didn't leave????

Let me walk you through how you got got lil boy >you link your spotify >has your first name, 5 following, 6 followers >no other identifying info >start finding the people you follow and who follow your spotify on FB >multiple of the 11 individuals connected to you went to Suncoast Polytechnic High in Florida >pull last ten years of yearbooks from your high school's website (no, that is not a "state resource" lol. You can literally google them) >catalog all Jacobs, start sifting through them >pick the most cartoonishly jewish one >Jacob Reid Baram >your dads name is Uzi >he's literally named fucking UZI lol > > > > >it was you

@joecarpenter678 Mock strawberries if they taste bad.

My yard, in town, has these little berries growing everywhere. They look like strawberries but I don't plan on eating any lol.

@gossamer630 @JasonBassler1 He gets paid when you ask him.

@JasonBassler1 If it took you two years and you can’t ask grok in that timeframe then why are you even on my feed. 👋 ✌️

Two years of researching Flock cameras and I still can’t tell you what these 3 mystery devices under the camera actually do. Any hardware nerds want to enlighten me?

@BenzoBuddyyyy @fleshsimulator What do you not understand substance abuse?

@fleshsimulator Dumping the mostly taken bottle of benzos you've most recently bought is so funny. 0 suits filed 4 bottles downed

@HeathDeMarco8 @ThorChiggins @jbillinson @jay_kobbe Nah, misery is for others.

@Elohyim1 @ThorChiggins @jbillinson @jay_kobbe Nope I’m pretty happy actually, I’m sure you’re a miserable prick though.

Wait is this whole thing happening in front of a fake facade of the White House right in front of the real White House

@AtomicErectus Only one way to find out!

Friends with more canning experience- probably shouldn’t eat these, right? Can was not a pop top, and didn’t hear a vacuum seal break when I opened the jar, so it was likely compromised, right? Gonna call them tomorrow and may suggest they switch lids.

@tobyemerald @xstinamendez My bosoms are full. Suck my tits

@xstinamendez I just fell to my knees! Mother where have you beeeeennnnnn

hello

@Abaraxoid Chick just really needed a drink

2/

Woman: “I want a drink (give me an excuse to fuck)” Man: “let’s go watch a movie instead” Woman: “this guy is an imbecile, I’m gonna go fuck my side dude instead” Yeah you blew it dude. x.com/brian_t_muldoo…

@CryptoCyberia Psychological. Can't stop thinking about bovine mammaries dipped in manure.

I will never understand people who go through life disliking or even avoiding milk. It's so fucking tasty and has great macros and micronutrients. I feel like maybe they only have had 1% or skim milk, and they don't realize that shit is not milk, but some sort of milk extract.

@fireflysonata @washghost1 You pour it into a milk container at home. It's akin to using paper straws. It sucks.

@washghost1 I want to see someone use it in their home, why a wobbly bag?

Bagged milk will always be weird to me

@darkvdred Grandpa ate them in Ohio back in the 80s. I liked them. I refused to try the Limburger cheese though. Smelled like tonsil stones.

I used to eat these in Alabama when i was like 7 years old. Not bad lowkey. If i ate one now my innerds would disintegrate.

@BigDadEnergyX I read all of that just for you to say something stupid at the end.

bag groceries + stock shelves get off work at 3pm it's saturday grab our skateboards and travel across 3 neighborhoods and highways get to our buddy's house hop in the car go back to the grocery store get the meat dept guy to buy us cheap vodka and malboro reds cowboy killers or get the hell out drive and drink across the pennsylvania line arrive at the bridge we're zonked bridge jump into a stream/river where there's boulders risk cracking your head open go around the corner an steal a rope from a barn be a dummy and scale a 30' tree tie it off create a rope swing cops arrive 'WHATRE YOU KIDS DOING?' 'drinkin, smokin cigs, being idiots' 'YALL BE CAREFUL NOW' no social media no phones no distractions just cheap bottom shelf vodka and cigs anyone born past 2000 will never get it we aren't the same