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Bazı Brezilyalılara göre 🇧🇷 Geraldao’nun 1986’da Cruzeiro formasıyla attığı bu frikik… Roberto Carlos’un Fransa’ya attığı o efsane frikikten bile daha iyi.

@SoVeryBritish Celebrating goals by screaming as loud as I can, with my Missus, 13 year old daughter and (woken up at 01:45) 8 yr old daughter. It only comes round once every 4 years.

Celebrating goals by silently raising my arm in front of a telly that’s on volume level 2 so I don’t wake my other half. #MEXENG

@fesshole These people walk amongst us.

They say that cats will happily eat your eyeballs after you die. I wish vets offered a service where they cut up the dead human body into cat meal sized portions and vacuum freeze them. I'd be delighted if I could feed my 2 kittens for a couple of months after I die.

@AndyRobsonTips It’s not about liking if it should be giving or not. The problem is consistency. Davies in the first leg was giving as a penalty and was a very similar situation.

What we saying folks? Penalty or no penalty? Personally not for me, don’t like players being punished for handballs they can’t do much about.

@BigTomD Just watching King Gary for the 3rd time. When are we getting a third season, my man?

@SimonBrundish Surely it’s time.

@UberEats I need you guys to DM me

HAHAHA

@IcelandFoods Guess who ordered 5 pepperoni pizzas and 3 cheese and tomato pizzas, but got sent this instead?!!?

@__karl__ @fesshole Yeah, you smashed it, with this comment. Fair play. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

@fesshole Was it Kelly Rowland?

I used to use Microsoft Excel to talk to a married woman when I was in my early 20s. She would share the file with me and we could see changes in the file. We would just erase and save new messages.

@fesshole THE ONLY CORRECT WAY.!

Wife and I are in a 15 year-long unspoken war about whether the soap dispenser goes next the tap or up on the shelf. I've even engaged her sister into my side of the battle. I refuse to give in. Took me 8 years to win the silent which-way-round-does-the-loo-roll-hang war

@fesshole Entirely reasonable.

Every morning, around 5:30am I drive past my work neighbour, walking in whatever the weather. I could easily stop and give him a lift but years ago we had a small fire in our unit and he refused to let us use his fire extinguisher, so screw him.

@SimonBrundish Never give two fucks about the LC, but we do need to start winning, otherwise self doubt will kick in left, right and centre.

No win for Slot tonight Other than an actual win and that would probably only be good today and would have fucked us hard in December That’s why you sack off this shite in the first round

@ukdelivery_Evri HAHAHAHAHA. You’ve used your wrong account. You silly cunt.

Who ordered 2 @CraigDavid? 🤣

@AssistJustuk Yeah, I’m good. You look like a scam. Think I’m dumb!

@______JC_____ Hello,If possible, could you please follow back and send us a DM with your reachable Whatsapp number and your email address with the full details of your current situation so our team can look into this for you? Thanks! - Tom🌐

Warning issued as dangerous jellyfish-like creatures wash up on UK beaches after recent storms. Known as Portuguese man o’ wars, their sting can still hurt even when dead and warmer, stormier seas may be bringing more. bbc.in/42ALuos

@vikktorrrre @premierleague Who…? The ‘Man UTD’ who scored 44 league goals last season, all season. Pahahahahah. Grow up.

@premierleague Man UTD will still cook them. They are a high school club.

Just the 52 goals between these two last season...

@ToonRG @Rele_mawelela @SkySportsPL Soon shut you up, didn’t he, Toon24. Ya muppet!

@Rele_mawelela @SkySportsPL There is a big supporter base for livapoo.

Liverpool's new No. 9, Alexander Isak 🤩🔴

@Lea_EFC @DominicKing_DM Yeah, absolutely gutted, Lea. 🤡🤡

@DominicKing_DM Well this has shut millions of you red clowns up 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

❌ Liverpool HAVE NOT agreed a £130m deal with Newcastle for Aleksander Isak. The clubs aren’t in talks and it’s misleading to suggest they are. The only deal Liverpool may complete before Monday is Kostas Tsimikas to Roma; significant chance there won’t be any arrivals.