Ashley Wade

The movie #Sing is the best thing. Both children love it and so do Mama and Papa. #win for #Netflix

Looking at 3yo’s painting, speaking in a voice that would suggest he’s the next da vinci, “What do you think it looks like?” 3yo: “POOP!”

People who have it together enough to do family-themed costumes, what is that like?

One Diversity Visa entry in 27 years commits a crime and we must change our laws swiftly, but 33,000 gun deaths each year and we do nothing.

When a kid gets sick in the middle of the night, pukes in your bed multiple times (splashing in your eyes) you have truly learned to love.

Two children with colds = record breaking levels of mouth-breathing

The only thing missing at my gym is a bed. For total wellness I need a workout, a nap, and a shower.

Today, I said in all seriousness, "When mama says NO MORE BLUEBERRIES, that means NO MORE BLUEBERRIES." I think I need a vacation.

Set up my laptop on a book shelf, seated on a toy chest. Because the table is sticky. And I just can't right now!

I see hundreds of great comics, images, memes etc about climate change every year and still nothing has surpassed this. It's perfect

Me: what should I do? Dentist: stop eating sugar, drinking coffee and wine, cut back on stress.. Me: right but like realistically

Me: You guys can start picking up without me. 3yo: Or we could NOT start picking up without you. Touché...

How can you NOT like tacos?! 3yo is eating a plain tortilla. Not even cheese tickled his fancy this eve. Naturally I had to eat his portion.

While at once easy and delicious, taco night requires an insane amount of dishes.

I hope my children will run to me like this someday! twitter.com/earnknowledge/…

This cause is close to my heart, please sign: action.groundswell-mvmt.org/petitions/vp-p…

If you run into a crowd carrying torches & swastikas, get away. Don't look for the "fine people" that Trump assures us are also among them.

5-year-old: No one else in the whole kingdom could fit in Cinderella's shoes. Me: I guess not. 5: What was wrong with her feet?

Wife and I discussing options for going out tonight and having fun that will still allow her to fall asleep around her usual 8:37 PM.

5-year-old: *puts a lightsaber in her backpack* Me: You don't need to take that to school. 5: Will they give me one there?